Author Severely Unamused Posted August 27, 2011 Author Posted August 27, 2011 You don't want your marriage and husband does? Wants to work on it? Correct. You still want to be his friend because you don't want to lose that part. Yes. What about your husband? He wants more. So you get to choose the marriage is over and you expect him to be your best friend. Yes. Lots of wants on your side. True. Did he cheat on you? Yes. Did he beat you? No. Or is this a case of him not meeting your needs and you got sick of it? Yes. Have you guys gone to counseling? Until I started throwing the D word around, he was rather unresponsive. Did you "really try" and work things out? I've been lenient for nearly two years. He's been testing my patience. I'm assuming he didn't cheat or beat you as you still want to be his friend.Answers are bolded. I am not sure which of us you are talking to Most likely me.
Craig2425 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 I am not sure which of us you are talking to SU's husband cheated and then left to be with OW, now he wants to work on things. My H is described in the post above. Now I feel like a dick. It was for su. I didn't read her thread just that she wanted the divorce and stil be friends. That's why i asked in the last post.
Craig2425 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 I'm probably projecting my own feeling into your thread. I didn't cheat but disnt meet my w needs until it was too late. All sorts of drama now and I'm not going to thread jack you. I'm going to go out for a walk. Good luck.
dreamingoftigers Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 I'm probably projecting my own feeling into your thread. I didn't cheat but disnt meet my w needs until it was too late. All sorts of drama now and I'm not going to thread jack you. I'm going to go out for a walk. Good luck. Yay;) walking is so good for cardiovascular health. No sarc.
Author Severely Unamused Posted August 27, 2011 Author Posted August 27, 2011 I'm probably projecting my own feeling into your thread. I didn't cheat but disnt meet my w needs until it was too late. All sorts of drama now and I'm not going to thread jack you. I'm going to go out for a walk. Good luck. It's fine. Yay;) walking is so good for cardiovascular health. No sarc. I'm a fan of aerobics myself.
dreamingoftigers Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 If you want to see someone have no rhythm, trip over themselves and writhe on the floor in pain: try to get me to do aerobics.
Author Severely Unamused Posted August 27, 2011 Author Posted August 27, 2011 If you want to see someone have no rhythm, trip over themselves and writhe on the floor in pain: try to get me to do aerobics. I'm reminded of when I first started doing aerobics as a teen. Let's just say that leaving a pair of dumbbells on the floor wasn't the most intelligent thing I've ever done.
Author Severely Unamused Posted September 2, 2011 Author Posted September 2, 2011 Well, it seems that you were all correct. Any attempt by me to be "nice", my husband sees as a chance for reconciliation. Disappointing.
Saul Goodman Posted September 2, 2011 Posted September 2, 2011 Well, it seems that you were all correct. Any attempt by me to be "nice", my husband sees as a chance for reconciliation. Disappointing. There are a few divorced couples that I know of that still get along well. But they are in the minority. Some people seem to get along better when they are divorced than when they were together, funnily enough. Or they use the logic that "even though they have failed as spouses, they haven't failed as friends". As others have suggested, it's sometimes about reconciliation or kids. The way I see it, a lot of it has to do with the nature of how things ended.
LifesontheUp Posted September 2, 2011 Posted September 2, 2011 My xH and I are not enemies and see each other in passing at work frequently. It took a while to get there as my xH wanted to make a go of things but I did not. My friends don't understand why I can be "ok" with him after how he was to me. But we had 18yrs history and he wasn't all bad. Depends on the people involved I reckon.
Author Severely Unamused Posted September 8, 2011 Author Posted September 8, 2011 That's good news. Still seems impossible in my case, but I'll give it some time. Maybe a year or two?
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