ilovedhim Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 My ex who I've been broken up with for months now suddenly wants to "talk". He says he wants to discuss everything that went on with us. No details. I'm seeing a guy now and my ex admitted to being with someone, maybe even while we were dating. Should I meet with my ex and see what he wants/has to say? Would it just be a waste of time and a huge setback (he really hurt me) to break NC just to hear him talk? Nothing will come of it, right? I have no intention of leaving the guy I'm with and certainly not after this ex admitted to basically cheating on me. I tried ignoring him but he was hounding me.
wilsonx Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 A lot of people here are going to say wow give it another shot, listen to what your ex has to say. If your ex hurt you as bad as a lot of people on the forum, nothing he says will matter. Let him deal with his guilt all on his own. Its only going to hurt you more. NC is about you, not your ex. Don't listen to a word he has to say as it doesnt really matter Good Luck with your new guy
Chinook Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 I agree with Wilsonx. Keep the NC going. All your ex is doing is yanking your chain to see whether you can emotionally be reeled in again. The fact that you are both in new relationships shows that the only concern he has is for himself. If he was genuinely bothered about his girl or your guy, he would leave well alone and move on.
geegirl Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 Me thinks things are not going good with his current and he is looking for someone to fall back on. Let him hound you. It's annoying because you let him annoy you. You don't have to pick up his calls or entertain him if you don't want to. In time he will get the hint. I also think it is unfair to your current bf to get your emotions distracted by this ex. Your life is going well with this new guy. Keep going. No need to jeopardize or complicate things. So what if you connect all the dots after talking? If you have no intentions of going back, let this sleeping dog lay. And your ex cheated? Why would you even want to entertain someone who betrayed and lied to you? Even more of a reason to keep him in your past.
radiodarcy Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 i vote "no" as well. it would be one thing if you were both single. but the fact that he's asking to meet you while you both are in other relationships shows how inconsiderate he is. clearly he wants to feel you out to see if you'll take him back and if you don't then he can use his current flame as a fall back. this is definitely not the type of behavior you want to indulge. be the bigger person. ignore him and stick to NC.
Jdw_Icequeen Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 I also agree with wilson.. If he knows your in a new relationship he probably felt that pinch of jealousy and realizes your not hoping for a future with him anymore.. So he is probably looking for an ego boost hoping you still have some sort of feelings for him.. Its a wash, if you don't feel like you need closuer from him I would just forget about it. Some people are overly concerned with getting closuer even though the real closuer comes from with in you. Let him stew with his own guilt don't give him a chance to lay any more crap on you.. Congrats on your new guy
poorguy Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 It means that things arent working out as well as he had hoped with his girl. Tell him to just F off..I get this garbage from my ex. When things arent going her way. She was always notoriously selfish..hes just showing you that himself all of again...poor him
Author ilovedhim Posted August 26, 2011 Author Posted August 26, 2011 Wow, honestly I'm surprised it's a unanimous no with you guys. Maybe I was expecting an apology from him but I know I won't get it. He's very selfish. In one of the emails he wrote he'd break up with her at the drop of a hat if I asked him to. Of course i never would but just goes to show he doesnt know how to be in a realtionship. And doesnt believe in karma I do like my new bf. For a time there I had forgotten what it's like to be treated with love and respect.
Author ilovedhim Posted August 26, 2011 Author Posted August 26, 2011 (edited) Also, he did ask me if I'd leave my current bf and i said absolutely no. He wont be getting an ego boost from me. Probably thinks I'd cheat also. Hitting ignore. Edited August 26, 2011 by ilovedhim
Jdw_Icequeen Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 I just wanted to say that I understand you want an apology all dumpees do atleast at first.. You want to know he cared enough and realized he hurt you and feels bad for it.. If he truly wanted to give you an apology though he would have txt it to you or emailed you.. He dosen't need a whole conversation to tell you I'm sorry even if it was followed with an explanation.. The fact that he asked if you would leave your current bf says it all.. He still wants to know he is the "one" to make him feel good.. If he bothers you again tell him to get bent!!
Nohbody Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 Sounds like you've made the right decision for yourself. Good for you!
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