starla33 Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 So I'm in my late 20's and so is this guy. We have gone on a few dates now, BUT one of my deal breakers is starting to show. He usually takes 3-4 hours to text back to anything even when hes the one that asks me something and I respond. He also doesn't tell me what time we are going somewhere till the last minute (or till I ask about it) Now I know he hasn't flaked out on me once or anything, but it still is getting on my nerves. Maybe I want too much attention or maybe some of you will call me needy, but I do not see how it is possible to always take 3-4 hours to get back to someone. NOBODY is that busy sorry. Going out with him tonight. How do I bring this up?
NursingGirl Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 So I'm in my late 20's and so is this guy. We have gone on a few dates now, BUT one of my deal breakers is starting to show. He usually takes 3-4 hours to text back to anything even when hes the one that asks me something and I respond. He also doesn't tell me what time we are going somewhere till the last minute (or till I ask about it) Now I know he hasn't flaked out on me once or anything, but it still is getting on my nerves. Maybe I want too much attention or maybe some of you will call me needy, but I do not see how it is possible to always take 3-4 hours to get back to someone. NOBODY is that busy sorry. Going out with him tonight. How do I bring this up? ARE you going out tonight? Did he ever call?
FitChick Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 If he doesn't feel that what you texted was an emergency, he probably thinks he'll just get back to you when he has the time to respond. He obviously has a busier, more full life than you do. Perhaps you should develop interests of your own so as not to totally focus on him. You could say, "If I need an answer immediately, I will call you. If it's something that can wait till later, I will text."
sweetypielovely Posted August 26, 2011 Posted August 26, 2011 well my BF did that in the beginning and i straight up asked him why he took so long to text back and he explained he often put his phone down and thats why he didnt always respond right away or it took him awhile. He would send a text and then got busy doing other things. I told him that it bothered me when he texted me something and then i texted back and then it took him a long time to respond when he initiated the text. Id tell him how you feel or simply say, "you know sometimes when you text me, ill respond back but then it takes you forever to text me again. Why is that? Id love to have a text conversation with you. Its just a little hard to have a conversation that way."
Cypress25 Posted August 27, 2011 Posted August 27, 2011 Texting is not Instant Messenger. Not everyone is glued to their phone 24/7 and not everyone wants to have conversations via text. Just because he texted you first doesn't mean he's obligated to respond to your text right away. You're not obligated to respond to his texts right away either. Maybe he just wanted to text you to say hi or to ask you a quick question. He probably didn't think it would spark a lengthy back-and-forth text convo. Some people find that tedious. You know what I do with my phone when I'm not using it? I put it down. Sometimes I even walk away from it. I rarely respond to texts right away, unless it's an emergency. If you want to have a conversation with the boy, call him or see him in person.
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