sweetypielovely Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 My BF lives about an hour away from me. We discussed eventually moving in together. I live near my parents who are in their 70s and am very close to them. He is remodeling a house and wants me to live there with hi an hour away. Im with a room mate and can go any time i want to. I personally dont wanna live an hour away. I think we should find a common ground half way in between us to live. He said he wants to be near his kids in case they get sick at school so he can go get them easily. His parents live near there and im sure they could get the kids if need be and he has to drive from where we live. Anyone been in this situation and what did yall do?
KathyM Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 My BF lives about an hour away from me. We discussed eventually moving in together. I live near my parents who are in their 70s and am very close to them. He is remodeling a house and wants me to live there with hi an hour away. Im with a room mate and can go any time i want to. I personally dont wanna live an hour away. I think we should find a common ground half way in between us to live. He said he wants to be near his kids in case they get sick at school so he can go get them easily. His parents live near there and im sure they could get the kids if need be and he has to drive from where we live. Anyone been in this situation and what did yall do? I haven't been in that situation, but I'll give my opinion for what it's worth. An hour's drive is nothing, really. I live in the Los Angeles area, and used to drive 1 1/2 hours to work every morning, and the same going back. Not that big of a deal, really. I can understand the guy wanting to live close to his kids for practical reasons, in case he needs to pick them up from school. You could more easily live a hour away and commute to work. With that said, I would not advise moving in together. I think it puts too much of a strain on a relationship with all the day-to-day nuisances cropping up. I'd stay where you are and continue dating the guy. Then wait for the ring.
BeyondtheClouds Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 Sounds to me like you two aren't married. Just to let you know, I wouldn't sell any property just to make any old boyfriend happy. IF you don't like the house that your boyfriend is remodelling, maybe you should find a new boyfriend, particularly one that doesn't have any children or living parents.
wild_urge Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 Poor you, it must be so hard for you to live 1 HOUR away from him, may be you should change boyfriends if it is so hard for to manage with the LONG DISTANCE !
creighton0123 Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 A one hour driving distance does not constitute a long distance relationship. Hell, most of us have commutes to work that are longer than that. When my boyfriend and I met, I lived 7 miles away from him. By transit, that took over an hour and a half (Boston, urban transit is very slow). That being said, kids trump parents. It is more important that he be close to his kids than you be close to your parents. After all, if you two continue in a romantic relationship, there is a good chance they will become your kids as well. Make the minor sacrifice. An hours drive to see your parents isn't all that much.
HeavenOrHell Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 An hour really is nothing, many people travel an hour to work. I'm sure you can work things out with such a small distance. What most of us here would give to live an hour from our partner You're so lucky, count your blessings!
LittleTiger Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 Come on guys, some of you are being a bit harsh. I think my SO and I hold the record for any LDR in terms of time and distance apart but I still feel for anyone who can't live with their partner if they want to - it is all relative. OP, we all have to make choices in life and if you think an hour is too far to move away from your parents then don't do it. You may have to continue living an hour away from your bf though in order to be near your parents. An hour isn't really very long either way, but what it boils down to is who do you want to be close to the most? As your bf's children are still at school then I can understand him not wanting to move any distance away. Perhaps you could suggest him moving 15 minutes from home and you moving 45 minutes from home. Sometimes a compromise is unavoidable.
CycleOfLove Posted August 24, 2011 Posted August 24, 2011 an hour? it takes 30 mins for me to get to work .. i wish my SO was living 5 hrs drive away from me. some people just dont know how to appriciate what they got, many of us would do anything in the world to be able to live an hr away from our SO's.whats the rush? keep doing the "long distance" relationship thing its only an hr away, see where it takes you.
Author sweetypielovely Posted September 2, 2011 Author Posted September 2, 2011 I am thankful hes only an hour away and the compromise is i guess i will move in with him down the road because he has the house already and all i have to do is move in. Yall are harsh, but i understand some of you are states away from your SO or even across the country so i shouldnt complain. Whats long distance to you isnt to me.
Rollercoasterr Posted September 2, 2011 Posted September 2, 2011 I would have given anything to be an hour away from my husband before he moved to the States. I realize that you think people on here are being harsh, and I'm sorry for that, but an hour distance is a cake walk compared to what most of the people on here are facing(most are in different countries than each other). I think it all depends on the area in which you live. Back in Kentucky I had to drive an hour each way to work, go to the movies, grocery store, ANYTHING. An hour for me would have been a completely normal relationship. I don't know where you live so I can't really say anything other than count your blessings. It could be a lot, lot worse.
creighton0123 Posted September 2, 2011 Posted September 2, 2011 I am thankful hes only an hour away and the compromise is i guess i will move in with him down the road because he has the house already and all i have to do is move in. Yall are harsh, but i understand some of you are states away from your SO or even across the country so i shouldnt complain. Whats long distance to you isnt to me. It's not only that. While I do realize that your SO and your parents are both important to you, being an hour away from either is not all that much make or break. Have you considered the possibility of simply visiting your parents when you're able? Perhaps spending one weekend a month with them? Are your parents in relatively good health? If so, there's no reason not to fly the nest and join those of us who aren't easily able to see our parents (4 hour drive for me to get to them, with my SO in Japan and me on the east coast). In the end, though, don't make any decision either way until you're completely comfortable with the decision. You've mentioned the opportunity to move in with him, but haven't spoken about either your willingness, desire, or readiness to live with him. At an emotional level, are the two of you prepared to move in together? That's a question for all relationships, long distance or not.
tigressA Posted September 2, 2011 Posted September 2, 2011 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t295322/ So is your boyfriend in this OP the guy you're cheating on your long-term partner with? And do you have two sets of parents? I ask because in the link I posted, you're apparently living with a guy you've been with for roughly a dozen years and your parents are living there too. Hmm...
Rollercoasterr Posted September 3, 2011 Posted September 3, 2011 Hmm..seems like a major part of the story was left out and some details were changed. Does your LDR know that you're cheating on your live in boyfriend with him and that you have 2 sets of parents? Poor him if he doesn't. And do your parents that live in your basement know about your other set of parents that live close by? Im with a room mate and can go any time i want to.And does your roommate know about your live-in boyfriend? You've been a busy, busy girl. Seriously. Why lie on a message board? Did you think no one would notice? It's the internet and anything you post is viewable just by clicking your screen name and viewing your posts. At least change your screen name if you're going to try and have a double life.
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