red_cloud Posted August 23, 2011 Posted August 23, 2011 I've been with my boyfriend for 10 months and at first I was convinced that he was the one and I was crazy in love with him. But we just went long distance though and I'm not so sure that I am in love or should stay with him. My boyfriend has a military background, so he's very closed off and unemotional. When we were living in the same area, this was alright since I'd see him every few days, and he's very physically affectionate. Now, that we don't see each other that often and just talk on the phone. He calls me every day but I feel like talking to him is more of a checking in with my parents than having a convo with my boyfriend. It was his idea to stay together when we went long distance, but there is no talk of the future or any expectations, and when I tried to ask how often he wants us to see each other, he said we'll figure it out later. He hasn't told me that he loves me, although, he has said that he thinks that it's un-romantic when a woman brings up these topics first (so me saying it to him won't go over too well). I was hoping that we could spend Labor day together, but he already made plans to hang out with him friends, because he assumed I'd be busy with school. I'm not a very emotional person myself, so before I really appreciated his composure and calm responses. Now, it's just driving me insane and I feel like he really could care less if the relationship works out. I'm not sure if I'm feeling this way because I really don't love him and am just trying to make this work for the sake of keeping the relationship or because the honeymoon phase is over and he's no longer perfect to me. I don't know whether to question his intentions, or just accept that his calling me every day and wanting to stay with me are his way of expressing his love.
Lucky555 Posted August 23, 2011 Posted August 23, 2011 It seems my relationship is long distance too. I only see him once a week. So after talking with others on here to talk to my bf. I told my bf he is unemotional and it's affecting us. He said it was hard since we see each other once a week. It has been 10 months for me too. I have not heard any talk of future, no introduction to family, and no I love you. So My bf told me he was willing to try to work on things. He also said he was unaware of the future with us and he is trying to take it slow. However 10 months of having an intimate relationship tells me it's time. I did tell him we could try but I now have my answer that he does not love me which I'm very disturbed and feel he an I are not on the same page. He claimed it was hard to feel close to me. I'm in a pickle here. I feel less desire to even talk to him now, I feel he had been feeding me lines by saying things on where would we buy a house ( just to keep me around), he is also uncertain of us. I believe if you love someone you know you try to make it through but im in a very confused state My suggestion talk to him and tell him what you need Then go from there I am at the go from there stage but feeling blue and unhappy...I'm not sure what I want to do...
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