Tipto Posted August 23, 2011 Posted August 23, 2011 Thank you for clicking. I met a girl in Europe 4 years ago. We were housemates, we got together, she wanted to move back to the states with me, she did, we got married so she could stay longer, living together made the marriage real, I fell deeper and deeper in love, she fell out, I think... She had problems from the get go, but I am a very patient person. There were drinking problems, violence problems, emotional abuse, infidelity on both sides (she was first, but mine was worse), and we argued a lot. Thing is, all that **** really stopped over a year ago once we stopped drinking. A month ago we got drunk with some people and she said I got violent (no hitting, she said I bit her) and she moved out. After NC I broke it after a week of taking a vacation, and we met. Went well. Another week, met again, went very well (sex, spent weekend at her place). Next weekend, went ok (for some reason sometimes she just can't help being miserable). That weekend I think she met a guy, and she is now seeing him. I did NC after I heard about it, nothing the following weekend, but then she broke NC the following Monday and said she wanted to see me. I am an idiot so I said ok. We met, went well, she called the next day and was sick and wanted me to come over and comfort her. Spent the WHOLE week and weekend together. Had sex, even though I know she is seeing this new guy. Left her last night, crying, not saying she wants me back, but in her eyes she loves me and misses me dearly. I told her I probably wouldn't see her for a long time (I was assuming she would want to spend all this week with her new man, and I was planning to get serious about getting over her), but then today she calls and wants to ****ing hang out again tomorrow night! I am going to see her, because I love spending time with her, even if we don't ****, and she is leaving back to Europe in two weeks to continue schooling. There is a very likely possibility she will come back in the spring to intern here in the states. Anyone been in a situation similar, sharing an ex with a new boyfriend? The crazy side of me wants to call up the new guy and tell him what is going on, because I am pretty sure he is oblivious, but I know it should be her choice. Am I setting myself up to be royally ****ed? I want to get back together. I know any answers I receive here can only go so far, but I really feel lonely and need some other perspectives. (a side note that wrenches my heart, when we have sex now, she behaves very passively, with minimal output on her part - I guess she saves all her passion for the new guy...) Thank you again.
Author Tipto Posted August 23, 2011 Author Posted August 23, 2011 Is there a way I can turn this around? Should I cancel for tonight?
EgoJoe Posted August 23, 2011 Posted August 23, 2011 I would cancel tonight and try to clear your head. Maybe reschedule something a week or two out.
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