Bboy2007 Posted August 22, 2011 Posted August 22, 2011 so me and my ex got in a huge argument a few weeks ago. The way it ended she made it clear that she didn't want anything to do with me. I taught she was just saying that because she was angry but now i know she really meant it because there's been no contact between us and it seems like shes pretty happy with her life im not going to lie it feels like my heart was literally sliced in half with a dagger . The question is Her birthday is coming up in a few days and i was wondering if it was a bad to wish her a happy birthday nothing serious just a simple "happy birthday". This will probably be the last words that she will ever hear/read from me so is it a bad idea or not? Also if i do will this make her think that im annoying/clingy/stalking her because i dont want that at all
dylan797 Posted August 22, 2011 Posted August 22, 2011 Ummmmm...my advice is leave her alone. I don't know the details of what your argument was about, but it sounds like she's not interested in hearing from you, so I would avoid any contact. I know it's tempting, I've been there myself. I regret anytime I found an excuse to text an ex. It's not that it was received poorly. It's just it doesn't change anything. Once it's over it's over. If I were you I'd focus more on getting yourself whole again and moving on. It's tough, but take a deep breath, accept that it's over and move on. The sad fact is in two years, you prob won't even remember her name. I know it's doesn't feel like that now, but trust me, you'll move on.
Author Bboy2007 Posted August 22, 2011 Author Posted August 22, 2011 Thanks for replying Dylan appreciate it. But does anybody else have an opinion they want to share?
geegirl Posted August 22, 2011 Posted August 22, 2011 Thanks for replying Dylan appreciate it. But does anybody else have an opinion they want to share? I believe the only reason you want to wish her is because you'd like to get a reaction from her. She's left you in the dark and short of you being direct and asking her for an answer, this is a little window of opportunity for you to try and get a response/reaction. Testing the waters to see where she is so to speak. If she can't end it with you in a decent and civil manner, or grant you compassion and respect knowing you are hurt, why would you extend her the courtesy of wishing her a happy birthday. It is obvious that she really has no care to hear from you or talk to you. Respect yourself by stepping away and leaving her be. Her silence is a clear indication to you that she prefers not to have an interaction. She told you it's over. Respect yourself and her decision to move on.
radiodarcy Posted August 22, 2011 Posted August 22, 2011 (edited) don't do it. it will definitely make you look clingy and desperate - - esp since she made it clear that she's done. i've read a few stories on here of people who broke NC to wish their exes a happy birthday and in some cases it made the exes very uncomfortable. it's just awkward to hear from someone you've cut ties with. my ex's birthday was last month. and while part of me wanted to contact him, i stayed away. he was the one who dumped me and even though he still wanted to be friends, i didn't feel like running the risk of being ignored or have him tell me he has a new girlfriend or even for a cold, impersonal "thanks". it just wasn't worth it. i know it's hard not to say anything. but she did tell you to leave her alone so just respect her wishes and your dignity and don't say anything at all. Edited August 22, 2011 by radiodarcy
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