Virgil Posted August 20, 2011 Posted August 20, 2011 Should someone ever stop fighting for love? Or is it worth it to put up a fight? My ex and I shared a connection, and I'm fighting for it even though it's over. What we shared was special and worth giving a second chance to, to see what becomes of it. Now I just have to convince her of the same... Thoughts on fighting for love?
just_scott Posted August 20, 2011 Posted August 20, 2011 i think that's one tough decission some will tell you fighting for someone after a break up makes you seem needy or clingy and will say for you to keep your self respect and just let whatever is going to happen happen [she stays away , or she comes back on her own ] sometimes you got to know when enough is enough and accept that their not comming back
danceallday Posted August 20, 2011 Posted August 20, 2011 I fought. I fought like hell for 2 years and it blew up in my face. Try nc - it has got to work better then what I did. Chased, tried to convince, bargained, begged, everything. You can't convince someone to feel a certain way about you and you never really know what someone else is thinking.
Author Virgil Posted August 20, 2011 Author Posted August 20, 2011 I fought. I fought like hell for 2 years and it blew up in my face. Try nc - it has got to work better then what I did. Chased, tried to convince, bargained, begged, everything. You can't convince someone to feel a certain way about you and you never really know what someone else is thinking. I knew someone would say this. You're right- you can't force anyone to do anything when it comes to love. But you can influence them. Otherwise, how do you land them in the first place? So right now I'm trying to get my ex to realize that we had something and it's still worth a shot.
esteem-jam Posted August 20, 2011 Posted August 20, 2011 (edited) No matter how much I like Natalie Portman, dancing, walking on hands, slam-dunks, nice shoes, card magic- wont influence her decision. Nicole Kidman is lovable too, right? But this fighting for her love wont work. Youll just achieve spectacular image of fights, show, but not love. Thats why I dont believe this approach: maybe when you change we can try. Youll be just changing and fighting but this all for one person to judge, and when you come back and he/she says "not enough" it will leave you devastaded. Live for yourself, the rest will align. Edited August 20, 2011 by esteem-jam
Orianne Posted August 21, 2011 Posted August 21, 2011 This might sound counter-intuitive, but I had the best results when I gave up the fight. In hindsight, I think the "fighting" caused my behavior to be unnatural, and my ex didn't like that. Once I gave up, I somehow rediscovered myself and turned back into the girl he fell in love with. I can tell it's 100% possible to get back together with someone and have it work (I'm happily married to my ex now) but it will never happen as long as you're constantly focusing on them. Bring the focus back to you and they'll come back if it was meant to be, and if not, you're bound to find someone better.
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