Memphis Raines Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 I wouldn't take my dog over to someone else's house, but my dog does sleep in MY bed with me. It's either that, or listen to him whine all night. If this bothered my boyfriend too badly, we probably wouldn't be sharing a bed long term. well I got news for you, there will be very few guys that are willing to share a bed with pets. I am in that situation right now and my current gf wonders why we don't have sex that much. Well gee, kind of hard to get in the mood after other sex sessions were interrupted by getting licked in the face in the dark, or having an animal walk across your legs while doing the horizontal mambo.
Author greenappleeyes Posted August 31, 2011 Author Posted August 31, 2011 well I got news for you, there will be very few guys that are willing to share a bed with pets. I am in that situation right now and my current gf wonders why we don't have sex that much. Well gee, kind of hard to get in the mood after other sex sessions were interrupted by getting licked in the face in the dark, or having an animal walk across your legs while doing the horizontal mambo. Like I said I always remove the dog if I even think anything will happen. If we come back from a date, I don't let the dog in the bed for example. Or if we're just in a really lovey mood I will keep the dog away. If I didn't see it coming, I will still remove the dog before anything happens.
KathyM Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I've been seeing this guy for 6 months now. I have a 6 lb yorkie who I love to have sleep in the bed with me but my boyfriend won't have it! Occasionally he will give in (after lots of pushing from me) and let him sleep on a special blanket but that's it. He wants him to sleep in a cage or a bed on the floor. I have depression and nightmares and my dog has gotten me through a lot of hard times. I live separately from this guy so I offered to brush and bathe the dog thoroughly before I bring him over and then insist that he sleep on a blanket at the foot of the bed (so he can touch my leg, but not be up near our pillows). I've done research about pet dander (it's not the fur that causes allergies, it's a protein in the saliva and dead skin cells), but he still won't budge. This is an issue for me because I can't see marrying someone who will never let my tiny dog sleep on the bed with me. If it were a 70 lb dog, I would totally understand. My dog is very well-behaved, happy to share the bed with my guy, and will sleep at the foot of the bed or on my side on a special blanket if I tell him to. My boyfriend even has a HEPA filter in his bedroom.. but that's apparently not enough. He doesn't even have severe allergies. It's not like he breaks out into hives or anything. Occasionally he might be slightly sniffly in the morning, but I think that's because I haven't been diligently bathing the dog before I come over. (And anyway his apartment is dusty and even I get a sniffly nose and tickled throat sleeping there.) Instead of insisting that it's not as bad as he says, I usually just try to accommodate him somehow or refuse to come over. My family usually watches the dog for me but they're letting me live with them rent-free so I feel really guilty imposing. He's my dog and he should be able to go with me. If we were married, then I would definitely consider giving up my dog sleeping in my bed for the well-being of my husband. But I'm not ready to do that for a 6-month relationship that has had some serious ups and downs. Does that make sense? Am I just being selfish? I don't know what other ways I can compromise without flat-out doing what he wants. I think you're making a mistake by letting your dog come between you and your boyfriend. You're giving too much importance to the dog. Your guy wants to feel like he has your undivided attention in the bedroom, and is not sharing your attention with a dog. Lots of people develop a strong attachment to their pets, but it can put a strain on a relationship if one person is giving priority to a pet above their SO. I have a strong attitude about the importance of keeping your SO as the focus of your attention, especially in the bedroom, and not letting pets (or children) to take that priority away. That's why I've never let pets or children sleep in our bed with us. I consider that "our place", not to be shared by others. And I make sure my husband (who is a huge dog lover) realizes that no dog is going to be sharing our bed.
Janesays Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 well I got news for you, there will be very few guys that are willing to share a bed with pets. I am in that situation right now and my current gf wonders why we don't have sex that much. Well gee, kind of hard to get in the mood after other sex sessions were interrupted by getting licked in the face in the dark, or having an animal walk across your legs while doing the horizontal mambo. I must be lucky then, because I have never had a problem convincing a man to share my bed. Pets or no.
denise_xo Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Also... my dog will whine all night too if he's not in bed with me or my parents. That's why I can't just make him sleep in his cage at my bf's place like he suggests. My bf sleeps like a rock so the whining won't bother him, but I have insomnia so I would never sleep! Is there no way the dog can un-learn this habit? Yes, you might have to listen to whining for a few nights, but wouldn't he start learning after, say, night four or five?
OldSkool Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 But Ill bet my savings that if you show your bf that you arent dependent on him or the dog, he would show you some love real quick. Stop enjoying being a victim! Put your big girl panties on, and be someone your bf can be turned on by. ^ This just destroyed any credibility you might have had. Greenappleeyes, I wish you could have asked this question to this forum several years ago. You would have gotten an entirely different response. This forum has gotten so full of selfish, self-entitled people who don't give any semblance of advice, or insight but instead seek to spread their own personal misery on others. I have a cat, I have had her for 14 years. She has been with me through my marriage, my divorce and my business failures and my successes. She is a source of comfort and constancy in this rapidly shifting world, and I would never give her up for anything. Quite obviously the majority of the respondents are not pet owners and know NOTHING about the bond between a pet and their owner(s). Unfortunately, I know where your road leads and it is one that ends in heartbreak either way as I don't see your BF as making concessions on this one. Do you find more comfort in your pet who has always been there for you, or the man who may or may not be forever. And to the absolute IDIOT who suggested that a man could do more to help her than her pet.... You are a fool. There is a reason that autistic children and other severely ill patients respond extremely positively to therapy animals and do NOT do well with caretakers. Could it be that animals are Loyal Patient Lack an Agenda (except getting fed) Empathetic Non Judgmental Here is a great link to an article about the dog of a Navy Seal killed on Aug 6 waiting by his master's coffin at the funeral service. http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/44271018/ns/today-today_pets_and_animals/?GT1=43001#.Tl6bv13A2yQ
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