bluenightowl Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I just noticed in these forums that people are often talking about being used because they date someone on the rebound who still have their EX in their life. A common response is you are being used to get over their EX and then they will get back with their EX or do. At the same time people say less than 10% of people get back with their EX? These two viewpoints seem to conflict to me. If we are all being used because they will get back with their EX, then where is the evidence to support that?
TigerCub Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I just noticed in these forums that people are often talking about being used because they date someone on the rebound who still have their EX in their life. A common response is you are being used to get over their EX and then they will get back with their EX or do. At the same time people say less than 10% of people get back with their EX? These two viewpoints seem to conflict to me. If we are all being used because they will get back with their EX, then where is the evidence to support that? I see what you mean, but maybe those that "get back together" are the off again on again types of people and they do exist. Some people break up with their SOs 5-6 times in a span of less than 2 years or so and they just keep doing the back and forth. so even if they got back together a bunch of times, they're really not gonna end up together, it probably wont last. I personally got back with an ex (he's my current bf now), but we had 4.something years in between the first and 2nd time. I think that's not quite the on/off relationships because so much changed in that time, and honestly if we can't get it right this time, there will be no round 3
grkBoy Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I think many people lie or stretch the truth in these polls. Look how many out there claim a blowjob isn't "sex". So two people break up, but they both hate the riggers of dating, meeting people, etc...suddenly here and there they end up hooking up just for sex. Seen many couples continue to have sex despite that they officially broke up. Now...I'm sure some would say they're back together, but they will say otherwise. Hence the low percentile. Plus I imagine some would feel embarrassed to say they are still banging the man or woman they know they shouldn't be having any "relations" with anymore.
Kelemort Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 grkBoy makes a good point - they go through all the motions of being back with an ex but try to hide it for a long time so it doesn't look like they can't make up their minds. An ex around is always a danger. I was my boyfriend's rebound 2 years after his ex dumped him. I know he wanted to be with her and if she were here, he probably would've been with her. Over the years, I believe he has fallen very deeply in love with me but unfortunately being someone's 'rebound' means my feelings are no where near as deep for him. But yes, I'd imagine people get back together A LOT, especially if there's no "no contact" period.
zengirl Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 You don't date someone on the rebound because they're not ready to really invest in a new relationship. It's not about them going back to the ex, perse. It's about them not being in a good state for the new relationship.
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