Sweetheartt Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Hey LS I was out yesterday evening walking my cute little fox terrier & this guy kept jogging past me & looking at me so I knew he was interested or w/e lol. He was a cute latino guy in his 20s somewhere & I always get good vibes from latinos because I think they gotta thing for italianas lol. Anyway he stopped me & my dog and commented on it. He was nice so I chatted him up for like a minute before he asked for my number. Um I was gonna say no because I didnt know him but then when I saw how my little dog was so into him I said w/e let me give him a shot & he called me up the next hour! I was like wow & we chatted for about 15 minutes & then he asked me on a date to the movies. I said alright but then my best friend wanted to go shopping at the mall & then hit up some other spots so I said hell yea lol. I text him back & said I had to cancel because change of plans & how we could make a movie date next week & he got all huffy saying girls always cancel dates just to mess w/ a guys head. Im like w/e so I left it at that but now I dont know if I should be bothered w/ him thinking that way
dasein Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 You were rude, very poor reason to cancel a date, he had every right to be annoyed.
Professor X Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 (edited) now I dont know if I should be bothered w/ him thinking that way You shouldn't. However, why did you make plans with your friend if you already made plans with him prior? Edited August 19, 2011 by Professor X
Star Gazer Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 However, why did you make plans with your friend if you already made plans with him prior? Seriously. What you did was very rude. And if you told him your "change of plans" involved going shopping with your friend (not like some emergency or work related thing), then you were twice as rude.
Ginger Beer Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Seriously. What you did was very rude. And if you told him your "change of plans" involved going shopping with your friend (not like some emergency or work related thing), then you were twice as rude. Correct. I'd be mad too.
Professor X Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Seriously. What you did was very rude. And if you told him your "change of plans" involved going shopping with your friend (not like some emergency or work related thing), then you were twice as rude. ^^ It was exactly the point I was getting it.
Feelsgoodman Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Hey LS I was out yesterday evening walking my cute little fox terrier & this guy kept jogging past me & looking at me so I knew he was interested or w/e lol. He was a cute latino guy in his 20s somewhere & I always get good vibes from latinos because I think they gotta thing for italianas lol. Anyway he stopped me & my dog and commented on it. He was nice so I chatted him up for like a minute before he asked for my number. Um I was gonna say no because I didnt know him but then when I saw how my little dog was so into him I said w/e let me give him a shot & he called me up the next hour! I was like wow & we chatted for about 15 minutes & then he asked me on a date to the movies. I said alright but then my best friend wanted to go shopping at the mall & then hit up some other spots so I said hell yea lol. I text him back & said I had to cancel because change of plans & how we could make a movie date next week & he got all huffy saying girls always cancel dates just to mess w/ a guys head. Im like w/e so I left it at that but now I dont know if I should be bothered w/ him thinking that way You sound like a total airhead, so I guess he has a right to be upset. However, he shares part of the blame, as his "flake radar" is obviously malfunctioning.
Mrlonelyone Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 ^ This I agree with. He said something stupid in anger. However that anger was understandable and righteous. You made plans, enthusiastically, then cancelled on him for no logical reason. Suppose he cancelled on you so he could watch a soccer match on TV with his pals, how would that feel to you?
Easyguy14 Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Hey LS I was out yesterday evening walking my cute little fox terrier & this guy kept jogging past me & looking at me so I knew he was interested or w/e lol. He was a cute latino guy in his 20s somewhere & I always get good vibes from latinos because I think they gotta thing for italianas lol. Anyway he stopped me & my dog and commented on it. He was nice so I chatted him up for like a minute before he asked for my number. Um I was gonna say no because I didnt know him but then when I saw how my little dog was so into him I said w/e let me give him a shot & he called me up the next hour! I was like wow & we chatted for about 15 minutes & then he asked me on a date to the movies. I said alright but then my best friend wanted to go shopping at the mall & then hit up some other spots so I said hell yea lol. I text him back & said I had to cancel because change of plans & how we could make a movie date next week & he got all huffy saying girls always cancel dates just to mess w/ a guys head. Im like w/e so I left it at that but now I dont know if I should be bothered w/ him thinking that way Im curious as to why you blew this guy off? I also wonder if you would've kept a date with him for next week or blow him off again. this seems to be a norm with young girls these days between your age and 30. not sure of why this is other than yes, you do wanna mess with his head. Im guessing he's already been through it before. I think you should call him back to be sure you wanna see him. if you were attracted to him theres no need to change plans so suddenly.
Mrlonelyone Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 ^ This I agree with. He said something stupid in anger. However that anger was understandable and righteous. You made plans, enthusiastically, then cancelled on him for no logical reason. Suppose he cancelled on you so he could watch a soccer match on TV with his pals, how would that feel to you? I didn't mean to agree with the "airhead" comment... I meant the post above it.
sm1tten Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Poor guy, no wonder men are so afraid to approach women these days -- this is what they have to deal with. Although at least you offered to reschedule, it was still rude of you.
Author Sweetheartt Posted August 19, 2011 Author Posted August 19, 2011 Poor guy, no wonder men are so afraid to approach women these days -- this is what they have to deal with. Although at least you offered to reschedule, it was still rude of you. I dont think I was that rude ok. He just said lets go to the movies. To me it seemed like something just off the top of his head. He wasnt specific to me about it. Anyway he text me just now & wants to know what Im doing tonight ugh. Cant he wait til next week like I said?
somedude81 Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Yes, it's very rude to cancel a date without a good reason.
Professor X Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I dont think I was that rude ok. He just said lets go to the movies. To me it seemed like something just off the top of his head. He wasnt specific to me about it. Anyway he text me just now & wants to know what Im doing tonight ugh. Cant he wait til next week like I said? You have here 7 people telling you you were rude, I think you should accept the fact that you were one instead of saying "I don't think I was that rude ok" - or the very least contemplate about it.
sm1tten Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I dont think I was that rude ok. He just said lets go to the movies. To me it seemed like something just off the top of his head. He wasnt specific to me about it. Anyway he text me just now & wants to know what Im doing tonight ugh. Cant he wait til next week like I said? You don't think it's rude to make plans with someone and then cancel for no really good reason? You must not have been very interested in him if not only did you cancel to go shopping with a friend, but then put him off until next week. But I don't feel sorry for him anymore because he's apparently willing to put up with that.
somedude81 Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 But I don't feel sorry for him anymore because he's apparently willing to put up with that. And that's a big part of what's wrong with dating. Girls who act like brats and guys who put up with it, telling them that it's OK.
vsmini Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I dont think I was that rude ok. He just said lets go to the movies. To me it seemed like something just off the top of his head. He wasnt specific to me about it. Anyway he text me just now & wants to know what Im doing tonight ugh. Cant he wait til next week like I said? So I'm confused - did he ask to go to the movies sometime in the near future and didn't say the day? or did he ask to go that night? Wouldn't you clarify that before agreeing yes? From my POV the guy sounds strange. You show him you're fully capable of flaking out on the plans the same day he meets you and then he just comes back for more? He sounds kind of spineless.
Author Sweetheartt Posted August 19, 2011 Author Posted August 19, 2011 You don't think it's rude to make plans with someone and then cancel for no really good reason? You must not have been very interested in him if not only did you cancel to go shopping with a friend, but then put him off until next week. But I don't feel sorry for him anymore because he's apparently willing to put up with that. I told him sorry gee. Cant I change my mind? Im not obligated to go on a date w/ him since I wasnt the one planning it & its not that serious its to the movies not puerto rico lol. Maybe next week Im gonna feel different. And why does he have to text me back the next day? Its so soon & didnt I speak to him yesterday already? Why do guys always do this?
serial muse Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I dont think I was that rude ok. He just said lets go to the movies. To me it seemed like something just off the top of his head. He wasnt specific to me about it. Anyway he text me just now & wants to know what Im doing tonight ugh. Cant he wait til next week like I said? I think what you did initially was rude too. I don't like his response either. Personally, I don't see this going anywhere. But I'd say that he asked you for tonight to test you. He wants to know if you're really interested in going out with him or whether you're just the type of person to blow people off until they get the hint. I was going to say that he probably should've waited until next week...but then it occurred to me that, from his point of view (and, frankly, mine) you might have just blown him off again if something better came up. So, why should he? I think this is his last-ditch effort to see where you stand. Ball's in your court now. If you don't want to go out with him, just say so. Edited to add: "maybe next week I'll feel different" - yeah, exactly. Obviously, you might blow him off next week, too, if you feel like it. The poor guy's trying to set up a date with you!
Queen Zenobia Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I told him sorry gee. Cant I change my mind? Im not obligated to go on a date w/ him since I wasnt the one planning it & its not that serious its to the movies not puerto rico lol. Maybe next week Im gonna feel different. And why does he have to text me back the next day? Its so soon & didnt I speak to him yesterday already? Why do guys always do this? I think it's pretty clear you're not interested in him. Why don't you just tell him so? No one's obligated to go out on a date with anyone, but this guy is not here to entertain you when you have nothing better to do (i.e. "next week").
vsmini Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I told him sorry gee. Cant I change my mind? Im not obligated to go on a date w/ him since I wasnt the one planning it & its not that serious its to the movies not puerto rico lol. Maybe next week Im gonna feel different. And why does he have to text me back the next day? Its so soon & didnt I speak to him yesterday already? Why do guys always do this? Can you change your mind after you've already agreed? Sure - but I guess now you can't get pissed when some guy in your future does the same thing to you. You can change your mind if you want - that's fine....but to act surprised that he and we think it's rude shows how little awareness you have about yourself and others. And about him contacting you the next day: I feel like this post is just a platform for you to let everyone here on LS know how "into" you he is. We get it...we're all very impressed with you and your cute dog.
phineas Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I dont think I was that rude ok. He just said lets go to the movies. To me it seemed like something just off the top of his head. He wasnt specific to me about it. Anyway he text me just now & wants to know what Im doing tonight ugh. Cant he wait til next week like I said? If you don't think you did anything wrong, why are you even posting this here? You KNOW you were rude & you are just looking for someone, anyone to agree with you so you can justify your poor behavior. Honestly if I were the guy I wouldn't of responded & ignored any more attempts by you to contact me.
proactivedreamer Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 Frankly, you sound full of yourself. No, you are not obligated to go out with this guy, but canceling on him to go shopping seems...je ne sais,rude. I can dig your feelings around guys being too eager, personally I don't like it either, but it does seem like you are playing games. Sounds like the beginnings stages of mind ****ing to me...ugh.
Author Sweetheartt Posted August 19, 2011 Author Posted August 19, 2011 Can you change your mind after you've already agreed? Sure - but I guess now you can't get pissed when some guy in your future does the same thing to you. You can change your mind if you want - that's fine....but to act surprised that he and we think it's rude shows how little awareness you have about yourself and others. And about him contacting you the next day: I feel like this post is just a platform for you to let everyone here on LS know how "into" you he is. We get it...we're all very impressed with you and your cute dog. LOL vsmini u sound like my friend. She always asks me why Im on LS w/ it & yada yada but its a cool place to see what ppl think on stuff & feel whats right & wrong. Anyway I was interested in him at first cause he was cute & he impressed me w/ my dog & my dog dont always run up to ppl. Sometimes my dog is scared & hides behind me but he was happy around this guy so I felt kinda good about it but now Im annoyed that he wants to take me out so bad!
Imajerk17 Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 You know what, thank goodness for posters like sweetheartt and the like, those who think it is OK to flake on people and who don't get how rude it is. Seriously. They don't cause us harm, because we don't actually interact with them in real life (probably). They are instead giving us benefit, because from their posts they are giving us real insight into what mindset they and the other flakers (whom we are coming across) have. And as a single guy, I am equally thankful for posters like smitten, Queen Zenobia, and vsmini, who seem to live by the Golden Rule. It's so refreshing to run into a girl who thinks as these three seem to think. To answer the OP sweetheartt's question, yes what you did was extremely rude.
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