PTba21 Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I'm new to this website and honestly was simply bored surfing the web, reading people's threads when I decided to join. I have always wondered why people lie, cheat, and have affairs. Maybe I am nieve in believing that it is possible to be in a relationship with someone and never break the trust of the other person, or maybe it was just the way I was raised. Can someone please shed some light on this subject? Maybe you have been cheated on or are the one who took part in the cheating. And please try to give valid reasons. Simply stating "it's human nature" is not an answer. (And I am asking about cheating in a serious, long term relationship, not a fling that lasted a few months.)
bentnotbroken Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 I'm new to this website and honestly was simply bored surfing the web, reading people's threads when I decided to join. I have always wondered why people lie, cheat, and have affairs. Maybe I am nieve in believing that it is possible to be in a relationship with someone and never break the trust of the other person, or maybe it was just the way I was raised. Can someone please shed some light on this subject? Maybe you have been cheated on or are the one who took part in the cheating. And please try to give valid reasons. Simply stating "it's human nature" is not an answer. (And I am asking about cheating in a serious, long term relationship, not a fling that lasted a few months.) What is a valid reason? Some of us think there are never any valid reasons. Others think lack of sex, a step up on the money ladder, or just because they are bored are all valid reasons. Still others dont' beleive in marriage(theirs or anyone else's) and simply don't give a damn.
Author PTba21 Posted August 19, 2011 Author Posted August 19, 2011 Sorry I should of wrote explaining your reason instead of valid
Linda9999 Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 There are as many 'reasons' for cheating as there are cheaters. My husband cheated because of a combination of factors - lousy marriage, sex addiction that he was a master at supressing, and not having the skills to try to fix things instead of running away from them. What it boils down to is that he chose to cheat when things got rough. Cheating is a choice that people make when faced with a certain set of circumstances unique to them. In their own heads they may think of it as the only choice, or the easiest choice, or the most desirable choice, or the lesser of many evils; they may plan it all out even before they're married, or they might convince themselves it isn't really cheating if they don't kiss/have sex/meet in person/ever do it again etc etc etc. They may think that's what everyone does to their spouse, they may resist for years and then finally give in. Like I said, there are as many 'reasons' as there are cheaters. Each set of circumstances will be unique, leading to the decision to cheat.
wheelwright Posted August 19, 2011 Posted August 19, 2011 There are as many 'reasons' for cheating as there are cheaters. My husband cheated because of a combination of factors - lousy marriage, sex addiction that he was a master at supressing, and not having the skills to try to fix things instead of running away from them. What it boils down to is that he chose to cheat when things got rough. Cheating is a choice that people make when faced with a certain set of circumstances unique to them. In their own heads they may think of it as the only choice, or the easiest choice, or the most desirable choice, or the lesser of many evils; they may plan it all out even before they're married, or they might convince themselves it isn't really cheating if they don't kiss/have sex/meet in person/ever do it again etc etc etc. They may think that's what everyone does to their spouse, they may resist for years and then finally give in. Like I said, there are as many 'reasons' as there are cheaters. Each set of circumstances will be unique, leading to the decision to cheat. Absolutely. No other answer.
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