GaelicSoul Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 Hi All, Well tomorrow im beginning my new life. I will be moving to the other side of the world for a new adventure, and will do things i never thougt was imaginable 8 months ago, when my Ex GF of 3 years broke my heart and and told me she didnt love me anymore. If your interested read my old posts. I have maintained a strict NC with her, and havent heard from her since Feb. She got GIGS pretty much, and wanted to party, making a fool of herself and hang around with losers. I now see all the red flags i didnt before. In another thread i wrote how i was receiving private calls recently and thought it could be my EX, in fact i got one again today, no answer again btw. So how do i feel after 8 months? TOTALLY INDIFFERENT! She really lost out big time. My emotions have calmed, changed my life for the better, left a crappy job and now taking on the world. Im happier, cooler, and my confidence is nearly back. Im nervous, anxious excited all rolled into one, and she is the last things on my mind. Thanks to everybody for all your advice and support this year. This place was always helpful for advice, and i listened to what you all had to say. Anybody who was Dumped and are going through a breakup should follow these simple rules. 1. Dont blame yourself, unless your a cheater or abuser and deserved it 2. You cant change the way a person feels about you. Only they can. 3. Begging, Spying, pleading doesnt work. It makes you look weak and pathetic 4. Delete and block them from facebook, save yourself the agony. 5. They left you, their choice. Respect it. 6. Do not contact them after the breakup. 7. Do not try to be friends with them. You will end up prolonging the hurt. 8. Talk to your close friends and family if your feeling down. Talk until your blue in the face from exhaustion.Get it out of your system. Some days are bad, that heavy feeling in your chest. Talk talk talk talk talk!!!! 9. Turn off the laptop, get out of your room and away from these forums and into the fresh air once in a while. 10. Make new friends and really learn about yourself and what you wont tolerate in your next relationship. Fix yourself first. 11........... if they contact you,and its nothing more than "hi" "i miss you" "hope your well" etc do not contact. Unless you hear, "i miss you and i made a mistake. I WANT YOU BACK!" THEN PROCEED WITH CAUTION! This knowledge is all over these boards, so what im saying isnt unique. Keep your heads up and like churhill said "when your going through hell, keep going" Things will work out for you, and you will move on and get yourself back. As my travels will continue, i will update you all with good stories and be here if you need advice. All the best GS:D
RedIvy Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 Wow. I'm going through a break up right now. I was the one who ended it because this guy who seemed perfect, turned out to be controlling, and emotionally abusive. The loss is hurting as we did have our good times, and the fact that I am "alone" is haunting me. However, I know that what I did was the right thing and I have no desire to be with him. I actually want to focus on myself and date myself. I'd like to know what it's like to truly love myself. This may be just the perfect time. Reading your forum was very inspiring and exciting! Thank you for your positivity, it shun a light into me
Flowerzzz Posted August 18, 2011 Posted August 18, 2011 Yes, this is awesome news and awesome advice! The dark days DO end! WHOOOOOO!
lalalandman Posted August 18, 2011 Posted August 18, 2011 Dude you rock! I'm feeling pretty damn good at 6 weeks NC. Some days are still kind of phasy, but overall good progress. Thanks for being an inspiration dude!
danceallday Posted August 18, 2011 Posted August 18, 2011 Great post! Glad you are doing so well and you your advise is good and rings true. Good luck with the new job and move.
loverboy1984 Posted August 18, 2011 Posted August 18, 2011 Great Post! Im proud of you and wish you nothing but the best. Have fun buddy!
Author GaelicSoul Posted August 18, 2011 Author Posted August 18, 2011 Damn. i cant edit my post for spell check:o Thanks Guys, heading to the airport in about an hour now!!! Dont give up, i know somedays you feel the pain is never going to end, but it really will. Whats for you, wont pass you in life.
MidnightinMadrid Posted August 18, 2011 Posted August 18, 2011 Good for you Gaelic!! Hope you are headed to Hawai'i where I am,thats where fun and sun is. I was thinking you also meant when they contact you,dont reply! Thats what I have to learn to be strict about it. Being friends with someone who doesnt want you is liek sticking around a job that you loved that you got fired. Wish you the best of luck. NC cocktails for for everyone!
betterdeal Posted August 18, 2011 Posted August 18, 2011 Good to hear! It's been 6 months NC for me too, and recently I have thought, "Of COURSE it couldn't have worked - what was I thinking?!?" and would not be upset to encounter her again. I wouldn't want to, but it wouldn't upset me. Just another someone I met on life's journey.
Author GaelicSoul Posted August 20, 2011 Author Posted August 20, 2011 Well, I arrived safely in Bangkok! Im not here a few hours and already i have met some cool people from around the world, and they are very friendly. I know what your saying betterdeal, im feeling the same way now. Its funny one day it just hits you, and you really begin to believe "it coudnt have worked out" Some people are not suited for each other, and you cannot change them. Anyway im heading North today! Later guys
Author GaelicSoul Posted August 20, 2011 Author Posted August 20, 2011 Good for you Gaelic!! Hope you are headed to Hawai'i where I am,thats where fun and sun is. I was thinking you also meant when they contact you,dont reply! Thats what I have to learn to be strict about it. Being friends with someone who doesnt want you is liek sticking around a job that you loved that you got fired. Wish you the best of luck. NC cocktails for for everyone! haha, id love too, who knows! Heading to Oz in a few months time looking for a job, might bump into you
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