John Michael Kane Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 Off topic and does not help the OP. Off-topic and does not help the OP.
Lexygirl Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 Off topic and does not help the OP. :lmao::lmao:
nyrias Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 Off-topic and does not help the OP. Wow .. you are still at it. And doing it to multiple posters now. I know logic is not your forte, but you do realize that "Off-topic and does not help the OP" is "Off-topic and does not help the OP", right? If you can not see that, please let us know by posting another "Off-topic and does not help the OP", so we can all have a good laugh at your expense.
John Michael Kane Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 Wow .. you are still at it. And doing it to multiple posters now. I know logic is not your forte, but you do realize that "Off-topic and does not help the OP" is "Off-topic and does not help the OP", right? If you can not see that, please let us know by posting another "Off-topic and does not help the OP", so we can all have a good laugh at your expense. Off-topic and does not help the OP.
Memphis Raines Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 If you all want this back on topic, here it is: Ian, whether she lied about it being physical, you'll never know unless you uncover proof. But she IS a liar. NOBODY texts the opposite sex that much if there isn't some spark there. At the very least, she was having an emotional affair with him, or flirting big time.
Owl Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 If you all want this back on topic, here it is: Ian, whether she lied about it being physical, you'll never know unless you uncover proof. But she IS a liar. NOBODY texts the opposite sex that much if there isn't some spark there. At the very least, she was having an emotional affair with him, or flirting big time. On topic, and very helpful to the OP. Thank goodness someone finally got it going back that way. Ian...it may end up being very difficult to prove one way or another how far this went. What OTHER steps are you taking to try to reconcile your marriage right now, given that you'd rather not take further action to seperate from her without proof of a PA? Have you considered marriage counseling? What are you doing to try to rebuild the relationship between the two of you, alongside keeping your eyes open?
nyrias Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 On topic, and very helpful to the OP. Thank goodness someone finally got it going back that way. Ian...it may end up being very difficult to prove one way or another how far this went. What OTHER steps are you taking to try to reconcile your marriage right now, given that you'd rather not take further action to seperate from her without proof of a PA? Have you considered marriage counseling? What are you doing to try to rebuild the relationship between the two of you, alongside keeping your eyes open? Sure. let's get back on topic. Here is the kicker though (i guess i will be the one bringing the bad news). Often it is NOT possible to uncover conclusive evidence in the past. Thus, if you decide to rebuild the relationship, CAN YOU LIVE WITH the uncertainty of not knowing exactly what happened? It does NOT matter how she behaves and what she says. You will NEVER get rid of that doubt in your mind. Are you prepare to live with that?
sweetypielovely Posted August 25, 2011 Posted August 25, 2011 Ive been in this situation before and it was certainly and emotional affair. He was giving her something you werent. She may not have had sex with him, but she got something from him you werent giving.
country_gurl Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Tap her phone. Im currently spying on my husband and its working. Iv picked up a few txt that my lawyer is excited about. He has been playing me for years now and i nvr knew a thing because i nvr checked his cell. Once I did he started to protect it with his life. Try this if your interested. [url=http://www.spymember.com/amember/go.php?r=49&i=l0/ No need to even touch the phone you get all there info via bluetooth Disregard posts by "Janett1." He/She is a busted spammer, read posting history. Is posting this same crap about spying in her husband's cell phone all over the forums here and other forums online. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t296280/
Tayla Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 Thanks Country Gurl, this character (JANETT1) has been on the troll/spam radar from day one. Persistant lil pest though, she needs to promote RAID or something that we can buy to get rid of him/her
RainDown Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 I recently noticed that my wife was using her cell phone a lot more lately and I got suspicious. When I checked her phone records I found that she had been calling and texting a male friend – a lot. In the month of July there were over 300 phone calls and almost 1,000 texts. I confronted her and she did admit that she has been communicating with him “too much” and that she knew that I would be upset at the volume but she denies that anything physical ever happened. She claims that it was all just normal conversations and that she really just liked talking to him about family, kids, exercise, politics, etc. She said that some of the texts did get a little flirty - if they were talking about exercise he would complement her by saying “you don’t need to work out”, “you have a great body”, etc. but nothing overtly sexual. I reviewed her cell phone records and most of the calls and texts were all during weekdays and usually in the morning to later afternoon (all before I got home from work). She is a stay-at-home mom and we have 4 young kids and the phone records show that most of the communication was before the kids got up and going for the day - almost as if she was up early and bored so would text him. As the day got later, the communication slowed considerably (but did not always stop). She has texted him and he texted her with me knowing about it – she would even mention some to me that were “interesting” and I was OK with what I knew – however, I had no idea of the volume. When I showed her the actual number of call and texts she was shocked, she said that she knew it was a lot but had no idea it was that much. She claims she just got carried away and he became the goto person to tell her everyday stories to. Apparently it all started with texts back and forth regarding our kids who are playmates with his kids. Then they just go more frequent, more topics, etc. One of the reasons she said that there was nothing physical is the fact that she is not attracted to him in that way, and frankly I believe her on that point – he is not attractive at all. She also says that one of the best things about our marriage is our sex life; she says she is completely satisfied in that area and is not/was not looking for that. She said that he was interested in her little daily thoughts and stories and that I was not (which I agree with). Based on the phone records, this is all new within the last month and a half and I looked back at our calendar and could not find any times where she would have been anywhere without me or the kids. I do realize that they could have snuck in some alone time….but it just doesn’t seem like that was likely, at least not for long or in a night/drinking/bar environment (which would concern me the most). She has apologized and understands my feelings, she has agreed to all of the conditions I have presented – deactivate her facebook account, give up her cell phone, no more contact with him, etc. She seems surprised that I would think they were physical (almost as if that was the furthest thing from her mind) but she does see my point of view and she does agree that the relationship was inappropriate in its volume and its encompassing nature (basically every day communications). My problem is that even though she denies anything physical, and I am leaning to believe her, there is still a doubt in my mind. On top of that, there is still the emotional affair (“addiction” as she called it) that bothers me too obviously. She is very remorseful, has agreed to my conditions and does not want to lose our marriage. My question is, without proof or an admission to anything physical how do I proceed? Do I assume they were physical and that she is lying or do I assume innocent until proven guilty? Until proven otherwise, yes you assume they were physical and she is lying. Everything your wife has said is textbook by a cheating spouse. "It wasn't physical", "I'm not attracted to him like THAT", "It was just friendly talk that went too far", etc etc. They ALL say that when caught. And most of them are indeed having a physical affair. You just don't know it yet and she is certainly not going to tell you until she is forced to (ie, you discover the evidence she is hiding) and many of them don't even come clean then. If I were you, I'd drop the subject entirely. Don't talk about it; don't ask about it; give her the impression you believe her and that she's off the hook. Then WATCH her. The truth will reveal itself because they simply can't stop. She'll go underground with a different phone, or email account, or some other means to continue the affair and it won't take you long to find out about it now that you are watching her. If I'm wrong and you don't find anything further, at least you haven't blown apart your marriage for no reason. For the sake of your 4 kids, take you time and find out the truth FOR SURE before you do anything. Good luck to you. I hope it works out.
Linda9999 Posted September 9, 2011 Posted September 9, 2011 My husband still denies anything physical ever happening during his foray into internet cheating. He paid an escort agency twice, plus sent other money to women, and was actually scammed. I do have proof of this. If I didn't there is no way I would believe him. Even with the proof I still find it extremely hard to believe. Then, after I found out and kicked him out, he ended up hiring a hooker. This he admitted to me months after the fact when we had moved back together - if he hadn't admitted it there's no way I ever would have known. Most days I believe I have the whole story. But there are times (usually after one too many glasses of wine) when I look at it and, to myself, I look like the worlds biggest idiot for believing him. I mean, the guy spent months on sex hook up sites where he obviously was looking for sex, he sent $1400 to what he thought was an escort agency, he went not once but twice to a hotel where he was supposed to meet up with a 'model', he had a secret cell phone for the only purpose of communicating with these 'models', he spent hours chatting with them on line. Yet he claims he never had any physical encounters during all this. Yeah, right. Yet I believe him.
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