DSVET9091 Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 It's my ex again, we go months w/out fighting and than he starts up again. I have two kids from him so I have to deal with him for the next 6-7 yrs. Kids are 13 1/2 and 12. This is the story he married his (mistress of 8 yrs) troll and my kids despise her and her kids. They begged him not to marry her, she had caused much problems between me and him and he went ahead and married her without caring what they thought he didn't even tell his kids they found out through someone else. So here's the story they are at the age now where they are fighting me to go for visitation and I'm sick of fighting them, they just don't want to go. He tends to treat her kids better than his own and they see this. She isn't nice to my kids either and when I confront his on things she says to them when he's not around she denies it and he sticks up for her. Is there an age limit in Maine when the kids can decide to go for visitation? I make the kids call him to tell him when they don't want to go and he than calls me threatening me saying it's all me making them stay home, trust me I'd like them to go I need a break. My son almost 14 fights me and yells, my youngest will make plans just to stay home. These are things I can't control I just feel they shouldn't have to be made to do. I've always felt my ex was narcissistic and his behavior is getting worse. He's like a yo-yo one min. he's nice than watch out next he's yelling and tearing me apart. He blames me for everything. My ex drinks all the time and when they do go he ignores them, call them names and what not. His step kids will brag to my kids all the things he buys them. I do my best to buy them what they need and they don't go without. I tried talking to him but all he does is hang up on me and call me a bitch. I don't have the money right now to take him to court about this matter what should I do? Again this weekend their suppose to go to their dad's but are refusing, last night I made them call him to tell him their not going and he threaten me with contempt of court. Any suggestions?
whichwayisup Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 You document everything. Go to court and if your kids are serious about not spending tons of time there, and are willing to go on the stand and speak up for themselves, do it. Talk to your lawyer, hopefully you have one. Somehow is it possible to borrow the money from family? Or get a loan from the bank. your kids are miserable and don't want to be around their dad and his new family. Do the kids tell HIM how they feel?
Author DSVET9091 Posted August 17, 2011 Author Posted August 17, 2011 My kids tell him all the time they don't like it there, and he just yells and gets mad at them. He tells the kids it's all my fault and I'm the reason for everything. Truthfully my kids are scared of him. I'd love to borrow money from the bank but I'm in no finical condition to pay anything back right now. Still paying my lawyer off and my family just don't have the money.
Owl Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 The odds are, the only way you're going to resolve this is through legal channels. I understand you can't afford more legal fees...but frankly, there isn't much other option. See if you can do some online research for the state laws concerning child visitation. The problem you face is that LEGALLY, you may be responsible for ensuring that YOU have them available to him when he's scheduled to have them. The courts don't allow for the children to refuse to go...as far as I know.
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