nikkig Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 I need a little advice -- My boyfriend and I were dating for 5 1/2 years. He told me he wanted a family and to get married to me. But we got into a big fight one night and the next day I told him "we're done, i've had it" and then he asked me if i still had the same feelings for him as I did in the beginning of our relationship and I told hIm "No!" .. after I said that, he said "im lost" and he seemed devastated. I didn't mean that I did not love him anymore, I meant it wasn't as exciting as it was in the beginning. Anyway, he broke up with me. He was sobbing in the middle of the street saying "I wanted a family!" and "I cant let u go forever because I love you". I wanted to work it out but he basically said he doesn't want to be together right now. He told me maybe in the future we would be together because he might feel differently. He became very bitter, not talking to me but still coming to my house and sleeping in my basement. I also looked through his phone and saw he's been texting a girl he works with talking about his new apartment and she said "i cant wait to sleepover" he said "yeah! i cant wait, are u gunna help me decorate my apartment?". I was so upset! So I made him move all his stuff out of my house because I figured he can't live with me anymore if we're not together. He's been giving me mixed messages, when he came to my house to move out he said "I didn't want this, i just said time apart" so I told him "No, this is a break up...time apart would be different". so he moved out. BUT he left some extra stuff at my house and I texted him to get it and never answered me, I also called him and he ignored my call. He wouldn't come to get the rest of his stuff until my father called him. I just want to know if you think we will end up getting back together? I really love him and want us to fix this but I don't know if he wants to anymore. I texted him about 4 days ago and told him "after today you wont have to see or talk to me again but I wish you the best with life and with your new apt. I truly want you to be happy!" and he texted back saying "Not the way your acting, if so you would be different". Not sure what that is supposed to mean!!!! He's acting so bitter and angry, he doesn't even call or text me. He lost so much weight, he looks sickly. =/
HeartOfAPhoenix Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 you not only broke his heart... you crushed his ego when you said you didn't feel the same way now as you did at the beginning of the relationship. Him being bitter and acting like that is his way of defending his ego and heart from further abuse. You may end up getting back together, but I would place my chances on winning the lottery over the chance of you getting back together with him.
LovelyDaze Posted August 17, 2011 Posted August 17, 2011 Will he come back? Maybe. Anything in life is a possibility. From what I read, the two of you were not forthright with each other at all. Sounded like a lot of mind games and everything. He could date the coworker just fine but since he(and you) have tons of unsettled baggage, that relationship is doomed to fail and so is any reconciliation you two have anytime soon. Lay back for awhile and think about what you said earlier. No relationship stays the same as it was in the beginning...none. The newness and freshness of anyone wears off clean and you are left with whether the love you feel can sustain years OR if you both love fresh & new so much that you need to split and try someone else.
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