What t do?

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I'm a married 36 year old man. I had a female friend of 2 years; who also did some work for me. we both have children that are 2 years old. All the suddon i started to like her more than a friend; I tried everything to not, and i don't know how she felt. Resently, she got back with her babies father, which i was hoping for her. A week ago she texted me and said that she's busy with her day job & can't do work for me anymore. A couple of days later i was drunk and alot of things came out. I lost my mine i said alot of mean things to her & told her how i felt about her & needless to say we arent talking. Now, all i want to do is say sorry a explain myself. I have alot of things going on with my finances, wife, house & it all came out at once. I'm so embarressed & feel like a weirdo. All i want to do is say sorry and explain myself sober & she won't even reply back from my text. More than anything i cared about her as a friend; like a little sister. What should i do or should i just do nothing. I love my wife so much; I never liked anyone else the whole time we where together & don't even know how this happen. Thank You