Jaina19 Posted August 16, 2011 Share Posted August 16, 2011 I have found a wonderful man. We have been seeing each other for about a month and in the last week became BF and GF, and met each other's families. Last Sunday he said he was falling in love with me. I can see myself falling in love with him and feel very strongly about him. The problem is I have been hurt in the past and am afraid of getting hurt again. Even a break up is painful, and I'm afraid of getting too emotionally attached to someone and then it not working out and being hurt. Especially in the early days of a relationship where you don't really know if it will work. I fell in love with someone about a year ago that I dated for about 3 months and took 8 months to get over him. My questions are: Is it too soon to have these feelings and can it really be love? And how can I get over the past and enjoy being in a relationship? Because I really want to let myself fall in love because I really like this guy, and I think it's better to have loved and lost than never loved at all. But I can't seem to let go of the fear that I will just end up getting hurt again. Thanks for reading. Link to post Share on other sites
Duckduckgoose Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 Read the book "How not to date a jerk". It has helped me a lot, by breaking down the dating process, and how you should be getting to know a partner. I would say one month isn't time enough for those kinds of feelings. Only after three months do patterns start to emerge in behaviour that you need to pay attention to. I have fallen hard for a couple guys in the past and it didn't end so well. What takes off like a rocket crashes and burns. Link to post Share on other sites
reimeivn Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 oh no its not too soon. your heart has its own reasons to fall in love, some of which you will never get to understand. you really need to throw yourself out there and think that even if you get hurt, at least you live true to your feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
John Michael Kane Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 I have found a wonderful man. We have been seeing each other for about a month and in the last week became BF and GF, and met each other's families. Last Sunday he said he was falling in love with me. I can see myself falling in love with him and feel very strongly about him. The problem is I have been hurt in the past and am afraid of getting hurt again. Even a break up is painful, and I'm afraid of getting too emotionally attached to someone and then it not working out and being hurt. Especially in the early days of a relationship where you don't really know if it will work. I fell in love with someone about a year ago that I dated for about 3 months and took 8 months to get over him. My questions are: Is it too soon to have these feelings and can it really be love? And how can I get over the past and enjoy being in a relationship? Because I really want to let myself fall in love because I really like this guy, and I think it's better to have loved and lost than never loved at all. But I can't seem to let go of the fear that I will just end up getting hurt again. Thanks for reading. Having feelings are natural. Link to post Share on other sites
reimeivn Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 you just take it real slow. if you do something and you feel like you are not ready to get that close to him, tell him. Link to post Share on other sites
Nohbody Posted August 17, 2011 Share Posted August 17, 2011 You are aware of the situation you are in. Be honest with yourself, and when it's appropriate be honest with the guy. Nothing precludes you from having a relationship with anyone else. Remain cognizant of the fact that you are not going to be at your best sometimes. You are going to fall in love with someone someday, there's probably nothing you can do about it. Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
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