Trimmer Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 Some of the responses on this are interesting. A boyfriend is an imaginary construct; it can be dismissed or created with a thought. A woman can wake up in the morning, decide the sky is green, and that her boyfriend of a year is no longer her boyfriend. No forms to fill out. It's not a binding agreement in any way. If a woman tells me she is engaged or married then I run the other way. A boyfriend to me is just the guy who is currently in first place in a race with plenty of laps to go. There is always competition, whether it's from the obvious suitors you can see or the guy at her job that she compares you too only he's taller, smarter and has a better job (and you never see him). Interesting points, but would you take your "competition" as far as the OP wants to, in that if a woman tells you directly, "I have a boyfriend", you would refuse to accept her statement as the fairly clear communication that most of us would (that being: "I will not welcome an approach...")? I can still see considering yourself being "in competiton" for that woman in the long run, but would you continue with direct approaches, and active attempts to woo her away from the boyfriend?
Mr. Slim Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 Interesting points, but would you take your "competition" as far as the OP wants to, in that if a woman tells you directly, "I have a boyfriend", you would refuse to accept her statement as the fairly clear communication that most of us would (that being: "I will not welcome an approach...")? I can still see considering yourself being "in competiton" for that woman in the long run, but would you continue with direct approaches, and active attempts to woo her away from the boyfriend? It depends on the situation. I am mostly talking about a situation where you have access to, or are on friendly terms with a woman, but she is unavailable because of a "boyfriend". If I am chatting up a stranger, ask for her number and she says "I have a boyfriend", then obviously I know this means "get lost". Let's say you are in a college class, and you end up sitting next to a nice lady, and a couple of weeks into the semester after chatting about the class and making small talk, you ask her to coffee. If she says, "I have a boyfriend" then to me all that means is I have the rest of the semester to try to change that. Now it's a subtle thing, I'm most likely not going to ask her out again or do anything disrespectful. But I will continue to flirt and be my normal charming self with hopes she will one day tell me she is suddenly single again (which obviously can happen for reasons that have nothing to do with me). So really it's not about stealing anybody as much as just staying in the game and providing some competition.
utterer of lies Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 Huh, I don't quite get the logic. He's failed to get any single women to hit him up so far. It's not logic, it's desperation. But don't worry - with his long track of proven successes, no one needs to worry about him destroying a relationship.
Trimmer Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 It depends on the situation. I am mostly talking about a situation where you have access to, or are on friendly terms with a woman, but she is unavailable because of a "boyfriend". If I am chatting up a stranger, ask for her number and she says "I have a boyfriend", then obviously I know this means "get lost". Let's say you are in a college class, and you end up sitting next to a nice lady, and a couple of weeks into the semester after chatting about the class and making small talk, you ask her to coffee. If she says, "I have a boyfriend" then to me all that means is I have the rest of the semester to try to change that. Now it's a subtle thing, I'm most likely not going to ask her out again or do anything disrespectful. But I will continue to flirt and be my normal charming self with hopes she will one day tell me she is suddenly single again (which obviously can happen for reasons that have nothing to do with me). So really it's not about stealing anybody as much as just staying in the game and providing some competition. I understand, and that all makes sense. Having said that, I don't think that the OP has such a nuanced approach in mind...
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