Fab001 Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 Well, we have planned no contact for a couple of months then we will update on the situation. In the time being I' m making my dues: I try to get out of the house, meeting people (not easy since I happen to move where I know nobody [as yet]). I did loose weight not because of a diet or exercise but I totally lost my appetite after the breakup.. I want to do something meaningful while we are separated I want to show myself (and him) i can manage on my own and I have plans but i lack motivation...among others i am also jobless in this moment...so nothing in my life is working properly at this time. How can you get motivations when you have no drive? Where do/did you find the strength to do stuff? Thanks.
blakjak Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 Gosh, I am in the process of sorting my life out after a breakup too.... I currently go to the gym 5 days a week... I go out with my mates all the time(parties,clubbing,trips etc)... I wear suits and nice clothes... Stopped drinking.... I still find I am in incredible pain lol... And it will hurt for some time. The way I motivate myself sounds pathetic but it's the only way I can get myself out of the house and be active. I tell myself my former gf is having a good time and probably not thinking about me. If she is feeling great and living life without me why should I be miserable over her? I motivate myself by trying to prove to myself that I don't need her and that I can live life without her. I am determined to prove myself tht regardless of how i feel, I am attractive, I am in shape, I am popular/ well liked and that I have alot going for me in life. I know it's not exactly the most positive form of motivation... And even 3 months after the breakup I still feel miserable... But at least I am not inside all the time, getting fat , alone and wallowing in self pity. That's not attractive and it's not healthy.
Author Fab001 Posted August 13, 2011 Author Posted August 13, 2011 I am determined to prove myself tht regardless of how i feel, I am attractive, I am in shape, I am popular/ well liked and that I have alot going for me in life. I know it's not exactly the most positive form of motivation... And even 3 months after the breakup I still feel miserable. Why do you think it's not the most positive motivation? I think it's the perfect motivation you might have. it's the same motivation I am trying to collect myself: regardless the fact whether we will get back together or not (as in the subject: we are on a break, a pause - or how you call it in English) it is always essential being able to go on without anyone else in our life. Having said that, that's correct, this does not ease the pain neither. So my question should have be instead: how do you ease the pain? thanks for your reply.
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