Junkshakemail Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 I got introduced to this girl from a friend and we had an amazing first date and an even better second date (we connected and we have soo much in common) and she genuinely enjoyed my company and so did I. During the second date, she brought it up saying that she wants to take it slow cause of her priorities for school etc and I said thats what I want to and if it leads to a relationship then it does and no pressure. I texted her after an hour when she got on the subway saying hope you are home safely, had a amazing evening would love to meet you again. She texts back saying im, you too I suppose.(weird right, yet during the second day she mentioned how much she liked the first date) Then the next day I texted her asking if she was free this weekend and she said she has made plans to go out of town with her friends, I replied saying let me know when you are free next. She has not replied to that nor made contact. Should I contact her to make plans for a later date or wait till she does(that was on Monday) Any help is appreciated
Mr. Slim Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 For some reason, not necessarily one that spells doom, she threw on the brakes with the take it slow statement. Personally, I would not contact her again until she responds. When I ask a woman out, it's a big deal for me and usually involves planning and expense. It's certainly not an open-ended ticket to be taken for granted. Even at least picking a day a couple of weeks in advance is fine, but showing no urgency is not. Plus, if she does break a silence of a few or more days you will at least no she has some interest. On the other hand, I'm often quick to criticize women for going to the "he's just not into me" excuse just because a guy isn't going bananas over her... so since she technically hasn't told you to get lost or been inconsiderate (yet), I could also say to just proceed as if things are fine and give her a call to see how she's doing. I know, not much help am I?
Sanman Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 I would simply wait. She may just be trying to fade out and not be interested. She may be interested in something more casual. It is possible she is seeing other guys and evaluating those dates before she gets back to you. In any event, I don't think this is serious for her. IF you want casual dating or fwb go for it if she contacts you. However, any girl seriously into you would have contacted you by now.
theseeker Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 I think the "I suppose" might have been in response to the question: Did you get home alright? But as far as your question is concerned, I wouldn't text her until she texts you. She might have things going on in her life, you know? More so than just school. I think she probably really likes you, but she is obviously hesitant. I wouldn't get yourself into a mental bind and get all weird and self conscious about it. Just relax & go with the flow.
Author Junkshakemail Posted August 12, 2011 Author Posted August 12, 2011 That is what I was thinking too, if she wanted some thing more than just friends she would have contacted me by now since I asked her to let me know when she is free next. My dates are a big deal as well, for both my dates I had planned every thing and it worked out expensive as well. I will wait a few days and may be tell her I was waiting for her reply?
Imajerk17 Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 That is what I was thinking too, if she wanted some thing more than just friends she would have contacted me by now since I asked her to let me know when she is free next. My dates are a big deal as well, for both my dates I had planned every thing and it worked out expensive as well. I will wait a few days and may be tell her I was waiting for her reply? That was your mistake. Expensive dates early on say "trying too hard". What was wrong with going to the zoo? Or getting some ice cream and people-watching? Call the girl and tell her you'd like to see her. Do it tomorrow. Hopefully she will do the right thing and get back to you.
Author Junkshakemail Posted August 12, 2011 Author Posted August 12, 2011 She texted back today after I texted her saying she had changed cellphone and said sorry that she couldn't get back. She wants to meet on wed. I said I will call later on today to confirm it. Another question guys, after I call and confirm today should I call alterrnate days to chat up with her (it's going to our third date) so I guess no point in waiting days in between calls if not how often should I call, she is not a texting person and I just started texting.
Mr. Slim Posted August 12, 2011 Posted August 12, 2011 She texted back today after I texted her saying she had changed cellphone and said sorry that she couldn't get back. She wants to meet on wed. I said I will call later on today to confirm it. Another question guys, after I call and confirm today should I call alterrnate days to chat up with her (it's going to our third date) so I guess no point in waiting days in between calls if not how often should I call, she is not a texting person and I just started texting. That's a judgment call. She obviously doesn't seem to be Chatty Cathy here. My normal philosophy is that for the first couple of dates if you already have plans made then talking on the phone is not needed and only gives you a chance to get that date canceled by saying something stupid. But with this girl... Wednesday is a long time and the way things have gone she might forget you ever existed. So yeah, you're gonna have to give her a call at some point.
Author Junkshakemail Posted August 12, 2011 Author Posted August 12, 2011 Well I called her and we made Plans for wed. And I told her we should do some thing she likes ( since I planned both the dates, of course I will pay during the date guys) i thinking of calling her alternate days till we establish our relationship? Is that right.
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