prophylactics

[Felixtheecat]

Condoms are so boring. Sensitivity definitely gets cut in half. My ex said that the pill made her really sick and she was afraid to get a IUD. Of course I loved her (still do actually) so condoms it was.

[zengirl]

Once I had sex without a condom...for two minutes. My boyfriend had taken Percocet that day (prescribed for severe headaches) and we all know what opioid painkillers can do to an erection. They make it last forever, in case you didn't know. So we started out with a condom as usual and I noticed that it was taking a long time. Finally he said he wouldn't be able to cum with the condom on, so I let him take it off. I was also on the pill and he said he'd pull out.

 

So he tries again without the condom and he was like "Oh wow, does that feel different to you?" I said yes, but honestly, it felt exactly the same.

 

Well, I'm not sure you can really feel the difference (from a female perspective) if you've already used a condom and been going at it prior, and if you're only talking 2 minutes. For me, the difference is more easily felt at the beginning (sex starts better) and over time (I can have a lot more sex and not begin to get sore). I imagine the male experience is different, as well as some female experiences, and a lot probably has to do with your level of sensitivity.

 

I really don't understand people who do hormonal BC AND condoms. I mean, unless you're both at the peak of your fertility and the gal is at the peak of her cycle . . . I cannot imagine it really being necessary to do both, even when I was paranoid (unless you always stay on BC and you just haven't been tested yet/don't trust the guy enough/haven't been with him long enough to go bare yet, which I totally get). I've heard of condoms failing (in life---I mean, I know people who had condom failure), but I've never actually met anyone who had a BC fail unless they did something they oughtn't (like take antibiotics and not use precautions, miss their pills, etc).

Edited August 11, 2011 by zengirl

[EmmaLou]

We didn't use them for years as I was scared of losing sensation, but we wanted to give them a try as hormonal contraception doesn't go well with me and didn't like the idea of coils inside me etc... so we tried a brand called Skyn, which are barely noticeable but strong, and we're both enjoying sex so much more as there is no worry there, it feels better for me as it's lubricated for that first penetration (which used to be a bit sore) and I don't feel burning afterwards which must have been from his cum. By his reactions he still feels everything just as well, and seems to cum harder as he knows I'm not worrying about pregnancy and so I enjoy it more...

 

I always thought condoms were like balloon rubber!

[bac]

As a man I think condoms take away almost half of the total sexual experience.

 

I'd like to hear from some of the women on this. Does sex feel better for a woman without a condom? Ladies, please tell us the truth on this.

 

My g/f is always telling me she doesn't want to use a condom but I don't know if she likes it better without one (says she does) or is hoping for an accident.

 

As a woman I think condoms take away about 5-10% of total sexual experience.

80% of total sexual experience depends on her own ability to experience sexual pleasure and 15% of it depends on emotions/attachment.

[zig]

As a woman I think condoms take away about 5-10% of total sexual experience.

80% of total sexual experience depends on her own ability to experience sexual pleasure and 15% of it depends on emotions/attachment.

 

You (and others) bring up the point I've been looking to hear. That it's not all about physical stimulation. It's about the moment, your commitment, love ect ect, that makes or breaks sex.

 

The stimulation that I receive without a condom is definitely superior but that is only a part of it. It's everything else. That fact that my woman trusts me, the risk involved (forbidden fruit), seeing my woman enjoy it for whatever reason... well the list goes on and on.

 

IME however, I'd place the emotional attachment much higher than 15%. As a man, I need the emotions to really love and enjoy sex. Otherwise I'd be just as happy to hump the sofa.

[eah]

To be honest, I can't feel the difference. And, I actually prefer to use them (as opposed to the pill which has side effects for many women) if we're not trying to have a baby. Also, it's cleaner. I find the wet spot left behind gross to lay in at night.

[FitChick]

so you are saying he should intentionally lie to his gf and get a life changing procedure? Getting surgery and than lie about it, is the worst thing he could do.

 

Isn't the worst thing to be tricked into fatherhood? It happened to a friend of mine, which is why I mention this cautionary tale:

 

Years ago, a friend who never wanted kids but had never gotten around to getting a vasectomy, was dating a much younger woman. She kept talking about how she wanted kids, but he told her he had never wanted to be a father. "Oh, you'll change your mind if you have them," was her constant refrain. It set off alarms, so when she was away visiting her parents in another state, he had a vasectomy but didn't tell her.

 

Fast forward about six months and she blurted out that she was afraid she might be infertile. Why? "Because I haven't been using birth control and I'm still not pregnant!"

 

Better safe than sorry.

[CatNtheHat]

Isn't the worst thing to be tricked into fatherhood? It happened to a friend of mine, which is why I mention this cautionary tale:

 

Years ago, a friend who never wanted kids but had never gotten around to getting a vasectomy, was dating a much younger woman. She kept talking about how she wanted kids, but he told her he had never wanted to be a father. "Oh, you'll change your mind if you have them," was her constant refrain. It set off alarms, so when she was away visiting her parents in another state, he had a vasectomy but didn't tell her.

 

Fast forward about six months and she blurted out that she was afraid she might be infertile. Why? "Because I haven't been using birth control and I'm still not pregnant!"

 

 

 

Better safe than sorry.

 

Getting surgery and lying about it is terrible. You have some warped ideas.

[FitChick]

I keep track of my cycle so I know exactly when I'm ovulating, and this has been completely effective.

 

Yes, the rhythm method is practiced by many. My college roommate, whose parents were Catholic, used it. The mother even taught the method in her church group. Oh, did I forget to mention they had 11 kids?

[CatNtheHat]

Isn't the worst thing to be tricked into fatherhood? It happened to a friend of mine, which is why I mention this cautionary tale:

 

Years ago, a friend who never wanted kids but had never gotten around to getting a vasectomy, was dating a much younger woman. She kept talking about how she wanted kids, but he told her he had never wanted to be a father. "Oh, you'll change your mind if you have them," was her constant refrain. It set off alarms, so when she was away visiting her parents in another state, he had a vasectomy but didn't tell her.

 

Fast forward about six months and she blurted out that she was afraid she might be infertile. Why? "Because I haven't been using birth control and I'm still not pregnant!"

 

 

Better safe than sorry.

 

 

He fully had the power to tell her NO, if she refused to use a condom. So that doesn't stand.

[FitChick]

Getting surgery and lying about it is terrible. You have some warped ideas.

 

Trapping a guy into unwanted fatherhood isn't? You have some warped ideas.

[FitChick]

Condoms are a good choice for premature ejaculators because it makes them less sensitive to stimulation.

[CatNtheHat]

Trapping a guy into unwanted fatherhood isn't? You have some warped ideas.

 

When did I say that? lol. I think something is wrong with you for thinking getting surgery and lying is ok.

[FitChick]

When did I say that? lol. I think something is wrong with you for thinking getting surgery and lying is ok.

 

I'm pro-choice. What people choose to do to their own bodies is nobody's business but theirs. I got a tubal ligation -- freedom! I knew too many men who'd rip off the condom in the middle of sex and too many who felt all women should have kids. No thank you!

 

To the women who don't like other forms of birth control, what about getting fitted for a diaphragm? It's natural, the guy can't feel it and you can insert it hours ahead of time, so no interruptions.

 

Do they still make The Sponge? Remember the famous Seinfeld episode where Elaine had a limited supply and had to decide if a guy was "spongeworthy?"

[CatNtheHat]

I'm pro-choice. What people choose to do to their own bodies is nobody's business but theirs. I got a tubal ligation -- freedom! I knew too many men who'd rip off the condom in the middle of sex and too many who felt all women should have kids. No thank you!

 

 

I was referring to a man and woman being in a relationship and the man going to get surgery without talking to his partner about it. Especially if they are married or talking about getting married and them talking about having kids one day. If the man I was with when got surgery without talking to me about it, thats a relationship ending.

[CatNtheHat]

I'm pro-choice. What people choose to do to their own bodies is nobody's business but theirs. I got a tubal ligation -- freedom! I knew too many men who'd rip off the condom in the middle of sex and too many who felt all women should have kids. No thank you!

 

To the women who don't like other forms of birth control, what about getting fitted for a diaphragm? It's natural, the guy can't feel it and you can insert it hours ahead of time, so no interruptions.

 

Do they still make The Sponge? Remember the famous Seinfeld episode where Elaine had a limited supply and had to decide if a guy was "spongeworthy?"

 

If you got surgery and your not with a man that wants kids, than that is great for you.

[Enchanted Girl]

Well, I'm not sure you can really feel the difference (from a female perspective) if you've already used a condom and been going at it prior, and if you're only talking 2 minutes. For me, the difference is more easily felt at the beginning (sex starts better) and over time (I can have a lot more sex and not begin to get sore). I imagine the male experience is different, as well as some female experiences, and a lot probably has to do with your level of sensitivity.

 

I really don't understand people who do hormonal BC AND condoms. I mean, unless you're both at the peak of your fertility and the gal is at the peak of her cycle . . . I cannot imagine it really being necessary to do both, even when I was paranoid (unless you always stay on BC and you just haven't been tested yet/don't trust the guy enough/haven't been with him long enough to go bare yet, which I totally get). I've heard of condoms failing (in life---I mean, I know people who had condom failure), but I've never actually met anyone who had a BC fail unless they did something they oughtn't (like take antibiotics and not use precautions, miss their pills, etc).

 

I really don't understand you. D= I've had condoms break and fall off multiple times. And also, I think you don't get HOW HARD it actually is to take the pill on time all the time.

 

So far, I've never missed a day, but I have been late by up to 8 hours. And its not on purpose or anything! Sometimes things are happening at the time when I'm supposed to be taking the pill or I just am not looking at the clock and even when I set my cell phone to go off at the right time, I often either won't hear it or it won't go off at all.

 

I would be using both, but my boyfriend can't keep an erection when he has a condom on. He loses it immediately and because condoms are supposed to be placed on the penis when its erect, the condom loses a lot of its usefulness so there stopped being any point to using it.

 

But I'd be really ****ing pissed if I accidentally got pregnant and my boyfriend blamed me completely for it when he placed all the responsibility on me. I don't want to have a kid and I try REALLY hard to remember to take the pill on time, but it still doesn't work out how its supposed to. I always have at least a few days a month where I'm late on taking the pill. And I suffer side effects (gaining weight and nausea and headaches are mine) for us not to have kids! If he got pissed at me after that, GRRRR, I just don't know what I'd do. And I don't know why you don't get this.

 

We didn't use them for years as I was scared of losing sensation, but we wanted to give them a try as hormonal contraception doesn't go well with me and didn't like the idea of coils inside me etc... so we tried a brand called Skyn, which are barely noticeable but strong, and we're both enjoying sex so much more as there is no worry there, it feels better for me as it's lubricated for that first penetration (which used to be a bit sore) and I don't feel burning afterwards which must have been from his cum. By his reactions he still feels everything just as well, and seems to cum harder as he knows I'm not worrying about pregnancy and so I enjoy it more...

 

I always thought condoms were like balloon rubber!

 

Were you guys using lube before you tried these condoms?

 

Because you may just be like me, where you don't get lubricated enough every time. We have to use lubrication every time (we don't use condoms) or it hurts a lot when he enters me and I burn a lot afterwards. It's not his sperm, its the fact that your vaginal walls have been rubbed almost raw from not enough natural lubrication.

 

I'm sure you have some wetness. All women do, but a lot of us don't realize just HOW MUCH you need for it not to hurt. Sometimes you need a little extra.

 

To be honest, I can't feel the difference. And, I actually prefer to use them (as opposed to the pill which has side effects for many women) if we're not trying to have a baby. Also, it's cleaner. I find the wet spot left behind gross to lay in at night.

 

I always keep my underwear next to the bed and put it on quickly to prevent wet spots from leaking onto the bed, even if I don't put on the rest of my clothes afterwards.

 

Getting surgery and lying about it is terrible. You have some warped ideas.

 

Trapping a guy into unwanted fatherhood isn't? You have some warped ideas.

 

Both people were terrible in that relationship to tell you the truth. Your guy wasn't a saint either.

[zengirl]

And also, I think you don't get HOW HARD it actually is to take the pill on time all the time.

 

Oh, I'm not saying the pill is for everyone, but I guess I cannot fathom bothering with BC if I were planning on always using condoms. Why put the hormones in my body in that case? (I do agree with what you said later about some sucky side effects.) I totally understand not wanting to go on it. What surprised me were the using-both-ers. And how many of them! Personally, I'm jealous of women who are fine with condoms (they really bum me out) because I'd love to not be on hormonal BC sometimes and have tons of sex with my BF regardless, but I just didn't think the person who'd only ever tried it for 2 minutes had a good judge of even if it would feel different for her (and everyone is different!) since . . . it was 2 minutes in the middle of sex. So, I think you're taking me way out of context.

 

However, I find it pretty easy---as long as you're taking a combination pill, you only have to take it within the same 3-4 (doctors/studies disagree, so I say go with 3) hour time period, not the exact same time to the minute, to be considered "perfect use." I really think that's pretty doable, and you know if you haven't done it (and can always go for the condom as backup if you haven't certainly and are concerned). Even skipping a pill/being late a day gives you pretty minimal risk if you look at the stats (I'm not suggesting being lax with this BTW, just saying some people seem to think it's WAY easier to get pregnant than it is). STDs are by far the easier issue to catch --- and ONLY protected by condoms (and not even always then) but that's why people should get tested. But if people want to use both, good on them; I just find is surprising how many are doing so. Seems intense to me.

Edited August 11, 2011 by zengirl

[FitChick]

Especially if they are married or talking about getting married and them talking about having kids one day.

 

My posts had nothing to do with marriage since the OP isn't married.

[CatNtheHat]

My posts had nothing to do with marriage since the OP isn't married.

 

 

I still think it is wrong to lie or with hold info like that to your partner.

[Cypress25]

I really don't understand people who do hormonal BC AND condoms.

 

LOL, I really don't understand people who don't use both! With perfect use, the pill is 99% effective. That means I'd still have a 1% chance of getting pregnant. With perfect use, condoms are 97% effective. That means I'd still have a 3% chance of getting pregnant. I don't like those odds, so I combine methods. That means I get to enjoy sex because I'm not worried about pregnancy or STD's.

 

Besides, if two people are having sex, then they're both responsible for preventing pregnancy and STD's. It's not fair to put 100% of the responsibility on one person.

 

Think about it: If everyone in the world used birth control AND condoms every time, that would be the end of STD's and unplanned pregnancies. I don't understand why people wouldn't want to be as safe as possible. It seems foolish to rely on only one method of protection; that's how accidents happen. It's like driving around and saying "I don't need to wear a seatbelt, my car has an airbag."

 

That said, I would not tolerate a BC pill that caused side effects. I had to try three brands before I found a pill that worked for me. My current pill doesn't give me any side effects and it shortens my period from 7 days to 4 days, so I plan to stay on it for life, whether I'm having sex or not. I wear a watch and I've got the alarm set to go off at 11:00 every night. When my watch beeps, I take my pill. Easy.

 

Funny story about condoms. We were learning about them in my sex ed class in high school, and a guy in my class asked the male teacher, "Can you feel sex with a condom on?" The teacher stretched the condom over his fist, smacked the kid on the back of the head, and said "Did you feel that?"

[zig]

This thread went on a bit of a tangent. That's fine, it was fun to read.

 

Even though for me wearing a condom takes away the total sexual experience I'm still more than happy with wearing one. All the reasons have been expressed in this thread.

 

I was just wondering why my g/f refuses me to wear one from time to time. The reason she gave me is because I don't cum with a condom. It's true, with a condom it takes me a long time, and sometimes not at all. Without one I can always cum in less than a minute. I think it makes her feel sexy when I can't last long. Make sense?

[Cypress25]

Without one I can always cum in less than a minute.

 

I don't know why any woman would want that, but maybe she's worried that you don't enjoy sex with a condom. Perhaps she dated men in the past who complained about condoms and convinced her that all men hate them. But if that were true, every condom manufacturer would go out of business. Maybe you just need to reassure her that you really don't mind using a condom.

[Enchanted Girl]

This thread went on a bit of a tangent. That's fine, it was fun to read.

 

Even though for me wearing a condom takes away the total sexual experience I'm still more than happy with wearing one. All the reasons have been expressed in this thread.

 

I was just wondering why my g/f refuses me to wear one from time to time. The reason she gave me is because I don't cum with a condom. It's true, with a condom it takes me a long time, and sometimes not at all. Without one I can always cum in less than a minute. I think it makes her feel sexy when I can't last long. Make sense?

 

Wait, what? D= How long does it take you to cum with a condom because that sounds like a lot of extremes.

 

My boyfriend can't cum at all with a condom on and never has which is why I don't allow him to use them. It just causes him to lose his erection and we'll be trying for two hours to do something and nothing will happen.

 

But without one, he'll take about 10-20 minutes, I'd estimate. Much, much better.

 

You seem to swing to the opposite extreme though.

[zig]

Wait, what? D= How long does it take you to cum with a condom because that sounds like a lot of extremes.

 

My boyfriend can't cum at all with a condom on and never has which is why I don't allow him to use them. It just causes him to lose his erection and we'll be trying for two hours to do something and nothing will happen.

 

But without one, he'll take about 10-20 minutes, I'd estimate. Much, much better.

 

You seem to swing to the opposite extreme though.

 

I can only cum half the times with a condom if I really clear my mind. Without one, I feel the urge in less than a minute but it's just the urge. I then stop because we both don't want an accident. I don't actually cum without a condom because I'd rather play it safe. There was one time I let my self go all the way and then pulled out. I'd say the whole experience lasted about 45 seconds.

 

My g/f complains to me that all her other past b/f could cum with a condom. Then again she also tells me I'm a sex god. Go figure, women are fickle. I'm sure it just that she feels sexy when I loose my wad.

 

I'd like to go all the way but I've read how the pullout method is a very poor way of birth control. Personally I know my body well and could pull out but it's not something I'm comfortable with. Is the pullout method really good or not?