P&R Posted August 9, 2011 Posted August 9, 2011 My girlfriend taking things out of context has been an ongoing problem in my relationship. I will say something that I mean no harm by and she will take it out of context and cause a huge problem. This has led to fights once or twice but I'm more worried about this causing her to shutdown. Whenever this happens she shutsdown for a few days then is back to normal. An example of one of the things she took out of context was her favorite author. The other day we were driving back to her house and I asked who her favorite author was. It turned it was a author that wrote books geared towards teenage girls(fantasy novels revolving around female protagonist). The reaction I gave was one of suprise; the kind of reaction you would give if you found out a long time friend had hobby you would have never expected. After I gave this reaction she said she was feeling awkward and that we should stop talking about it, then she shutdown for a little bit (only a few hours). I honestly felt bad but I also felt like I should not feel bad about this whole episode. My guess is she probably felt insecure because she's a 23 year old reading these books and maybe I hit a raw nerve? Is this a common problem in relationships? How do I make sure it happens as little as possible?
CatNtheHat Posted August 9, 2011 Posted August 9, 2011 My girlfriend taking things out of context has been an ongoing problem in my relationship. I will say something that I mean no harm by and she will take it out of context and cause a huge problem. This has led to fights once or twice but I'm more worried about this causing her to shutdown. Whenever this happens she shutsdown for a few days then is back to normal. An example of one of the things she took out of context was her favorite author. The other day we were driving back to her house and I asked who her favorite author was. It turned it was a author that wrote books geared towards teenage girls(fantasy novels revolving around female protagonist). The reaction I gave was one of suprise; the kind of reaction you would give if you found out a long time friend had hobby you would have never expected. After I gave this reaction she said she was feeling awkward and that we should stop talking about it, then she shutdown for a little bit (only a few hours). I honestly felt bad but I also felt like I should not feel bad about this whole episode. My guess is she probably felt insecure because she's a 23 year old reading these books and maybe I hit a raw nerve? Is this a common problem in relationships? How do I make sure it happens as little as possible? She sounds like me - extra sensitive.
Author P&R Posted August 9, 2011 Author Posted August 9, 2011 It doesn't feel like I'm walking on egg shells around her though... It's just everytime this happens she gets afraid to tell me things.
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