texasgirlatheart Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 So I'm pretty sure my boyfriend and I have reached the end of our relationship. We've been together/living together for about a year and a half now. We are both from Texas and I moved out to Maryland with him about 4 months ago and before that we were living in Kansas for a year due to his job. We've been fighting so much lately and it's ALWAYS about small things. I feel broken. I love him to death and have learned so much just in the time we've been together. Literally thought I found the love of my life. But, he's quite manipulative and can be pretty mean sometimes. He's mentally/verbally abusive. For example, this past Saturday night he went out with one of our room mates and his girlfriend to watch the UFC fight and I decided to stay home because I was exhausted from staying out late with him the night before and cleaning all day. When he got back I was passed out on the couch. I woke up to him giving me kisses and told me to go to the room. Before he left he had implied that when he got back we were going to hang out. So I go to the room, brush my teeth and then walk out into the living room and he's sitting on the couch with the room mate drinking. I asked him if he asked me to get off the couch so he could sit there and then he came into the room and we basically got into a yelling match. Ridiculous. He refuses to believe that I thought that we were going to hang out and that just because I had fallen asleep that was supposed to mean that "he was being sweet by telling me to go to the room so i could sleep comfortably". I told him I understood after awhile but I wanted him to see where I was coming from and he kept insisting that I was wrong. (This is always the case with him. He's "always right". He's even admitted to me that he has a problem with thinking that he's always right and that it's something he really needs to work on. He eventually ended up taking it back by saying that I needed to trust him for the sake of our relationship, that he knew what he was talking about.) He ended up telling me that I was crazy? and started saying that he couldn't handle this anymore and walked out. After awhile I went into my room mate's girlfriends room and started talking to her and she told me that she hears us fighting a lot and it's usually him screaming at me and that he's sometimes not a really nice person. I don't really know what to do. I thought that this would work for us because when we're good we're really good, but we can't seem to get rid of the meaningless fighting and I don't know if he'll ever change his manipulative ways. Now this leaves me 24 hours away from home with no where to go. I thought about waiting till my mom flies here in the beginning of November and then driving back home with her, but then I'm stuck. What if I never find this kind of love again?..
CopingGal Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 I think it would be good to never find that kind of love again. Find a better love- someone who won't scream at you or say mean things to you. I wonder "what I if never find someone who I get along with like I did with my ex?" But my ex is an ass. I don't want to find that kind of love again. I want a better kind of love. That is what I want for you, too. I believe that may me more than just one love for a person. There may be lots of people out there that can love you and treat you with respect. I went full NC with my ex. I miss him, but I don't call, email or text him. I read the book "It's Called a Break-up Because it's Broken." That's a really good book to help women process break ups with men and help women get their confidence back.
Mack05 Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 Texasgirl you need to listen to best thing we have at our disposal. Your 'inner voice'. You inner voice is telling you to leave. You have 2 options.. 1) Ignore you inner voice and believe things can change and instead u can make things worse, only to realise years down the line u made the biggest mistake of your life. 2) Listen to your inner voice. Face 'the fear' and give yourself the best opportunity to find someone, who is far more compatible with you. People stay because of 'the fear' and lives get ruined..
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