lonelynyc Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 I came on here Saturday to vent about the distress I was feeling because my ex no longer wants to have any sort of connection with me (it seems at least). I was very angry and felt pretty injured/weak. Well, since yesterday I have been feeling much better. I realized being suspended in a rollercoaster non-relationship with my ex in which she continuously alternates between wanting to be friends and wanting zero contact has made me miserable. I feel ready to ignore her calls/texts because I know they'll come. It's just not worth the grief. I have enough people who won't waiver in their love and support of me. It's time to live again. I screwed up by being so invested in someone who is emotionally unstable. As strange as it sounds, for now I feel like I'll enjoy being alone. I'm in my early 20s, and as cliched as it sounds, I never really took the time to grow alone and understand who I am as a man. I kind of jumped from one relationship to the next. I'm not even interested in playing the field, been there done that. I'm sure I'll want romance and intimacy at some point, but right now I feel contented and almost joyful to go without it. I saved up a bunch of vacation time and am going to travel to Panama to visit a good friend later this week. Bought the tickets impulsively and didn't have to go through any sort of hassles because I am a SINGLE man now. I still have love for my ex, but I feel like I might be falling out of love with her. Or maybe I'm just realizing I need to love myself more. For everyone going through what I'm going through right now, trying to rediscover who they are after a very crushing break up, I really recommend doing something similar to what I'm doing (if you have the ability to). Travel, get on a plane, take a road trip, appreciate how vast our world is and that there's more out there for you than the pain of a lost love.
TaintedHeart Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 I came on here Saturday to vent about the distress I was feeling because my ex no longer wants to have any sort of connection with me (it seems at least). I was very angry and felt pretty injured/weak. Well, since yesterday I have been feeling much better. I realized being suspended in a rollercoaster non-relationship with my ex in which she continuously alternates between wanting to be friends and wanting zero contact has made me miserable. I feel ready to ignore her calls/texts because I know they'll come. It's just not worth the grief. I have enough people who won't waiver in their love and support of me. It's time to live again. I screwed up by being so invested in someone who is emotionally unstable. As strange as it sounds, for now I feel like I'll enjoy being alone. I'm in my early 20s, and as cliched as it sounds, I never really took the time to grow alone and understand who I am as a man. I kind of jumped from one relationship to the next. I'm not even interested in playing the field, been there done that. I'm sure I'll want romance and intimacy at some point, but right now I feel contented and almost joyful to go without it. I saved up a bunch of vacation time and am going to travel to Panama to visit a good friend later this week. Bought the tickets impulsively and didn't have to go through any sort of hassles because I am a SINGLE man now. I still have love for my ex, but I feel like I might be falling out of love with her. Or maybe I'm just realizing I need to love myself more. For everyone going through what I'm going through right now, trying to rediscover who they are after a very crushing break up, I really recommend doing something similar to what I'm doing (if you have the ability to). Travel, get on a plane, take a road trip, appreciate how vast our world is and that there's more out there for you than the pain of a lost love. Good for you! Have you got room for me in your suitcase?
Christian79 Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 Totally agree man! Travelling works, I am going to visit a friend in Berlin at the end of the week. I have met some awesome people travelling (girls included) since I broke up with my ex but unfortunately they live in other countries, just have to keep moving with your life until the right person comes along. New experiences are the key!
Author lonelynyc Posted August 8, 2011 Author Posted August 8, 2011 Totally agree man! Travelling works, I am going to visit a friend in Berlin at the end of the week. I have met some awesome people travelling (girls included) since I broke up with my ex but unfortunately they live in other countries, just have to keep moving with your life until the right person comes along. New experiences are the key! That's exactly right! I've been craving new experiences for a while now. Here in NYC everywhere I go is just routine, reminds me of all the things I used to do with my ex before our break up. I'm tired of feeling sad, and ready to explore a new place. I'm not even interested in meeting women, just want to appreciate the beauty of an unfamiliar place.
sookiie Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 dats d spirit m8..nw u r free 2 do watevr u feel lik..d thngs u cudnt..nothng holdin u back..so al d bst 4 d new life n new YOU...
Christian79 Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 That's exactly right! I've been craving new experiences for a while now. Here in NYC everywhere I go is just routine, reminds me of all the things I used to do with my ex before our break up. I'm tired of feeling sad, and ready to explore a new place. I'm not even interested in meeting women, just want to appreciate the beauty of an unfamiliar place. "So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun." — Jon Krakauer (Into the Wild) If you haven't seen the film of the book 'Into the Wild' you should watch it!
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