babyygirllhi Posted August 7, 2011 Posted August 7, 2011 After 11 months he breaks up with me only saying that he is still in love but needs to be alone. We had travelled all over together, fallen VERY fast and moved into a very serious relationship straight away, and we were just crazy about eachother. He is 22, im 24. The first sign that it would end bad is after 1 week he told me "i never wanted a girlfriend, i wanted to be 30 by the time i made myself into who i want to be and i wanted to be alone". Plus that he had no idea how to treat a girlfriend, he always wanted to be alone and independent. however when he met me, he couldnt stay away from me. he moved to me and even after the relationship began i tried breaking up with him bc i saw it ending badly, he wasnt ready. but i was so in love, and he couldnt break up, so he came straight to me. he couldnt stay away. even though he wanted to be alone. he is selfish i guess, however he himself is a giving guy and very kind guy. Just very into making himself into who he wants to be and just never cared about girls .. (which is why he never wanted a girlfriend). But after travelling he said he needs to figure out if he can give me 100% or if he isnt ready... he ended up breaking up even tho he still showed that he was still in love , and said that he was still in love, that im the perfect girl in every way, he misses my smile, thoughts on life, laugh, smell, etc. and i got it out of him that he could see us together again but not now, he wants to be alone for years. He has never really been "attracted" in like this "i want you now" kind of way to anyone except me (sounds like a load of bull crap but its true...) he even told me once "i see myself wanting to have sex only 1 time a week" and we had some arguments about me wanting mroe sex . (However towards the last month of us breaking up, he wanted me ALL the time ...) and he would say things while we were breaking up like "its YOU.. and my body wants you like crazyyy". After we finally ended things, he ran of with his friend to live in an aparmtne for 1 month and they are trying to find a buisness idea now. Last time i talked to him, he cried. he said this is the hardest thing he has ever done and been through. however he doesnt "miss me insanely" or anyting, and it feels good to be alone. To be honest, I could feel throughout 3/4 of the relationship that he wasnt happy, something wasnt right, and that he didnt treat me good. He is a good guy, horrible boyfriend. and he wasnt happy with where he was in life. But what the hell??? I was INSANELY in love... and now he wants to see me before I move (we were planning to move to Flroida together..) but im going alone now. He still cries and says if its meant to be it will be. And he wnts to see me to say bye and when i asked him what he expects out of seeing me...he said that when he sees me he will pick me up, hold me and cry. but he needs to be alone, for years he says. at first i told him no, and he said "well think about it before u decide". then i told him no again and his reaction was this pleading "but my parents got to say bye to you!" its like he doesnt understand ... i told him that i want to , but i have to take care of myself and it might make it harder on me. he respected that. Is this just bull crap? I keep thinking we will end up together, we had a blast together and we truly became best friends, and he says im his best friend and he has never gotten closer to anyone than he has me, but if he hasnt been happy throughout all of it (for whatever reason, not being alone or where he wants to be in life..) then doesnt this mean that i just wasnt good for him? or can he seriously be that unhappy with himself that he cant have me even tho he finds me perfect? we have been broken up for 1.5 months, I found out that he has kissed another girl, and from what i know he isnt the type to just kiss random girls. plus he keeps adding a lot of girls on facebook. Is this just so he can get over me? he asked if i had done anything with anyone and sounded scared. but i told him no, i havent. to be honest, i can see him doing things with girls just to get over me. Im thinking of seeing him, being non emotional, confident, and happy just to show him what he is leaving. (because 1 week after iw ill be moving anyway...). i think this will be best for me, like to feel like i showed him heeey, this is what you are missing, now that it will be 1 month after not seeing eachother plus that i wont be crying and pleading for him to stay. i will be the opposite, confident and show him i can live without him and im doing good! Any ideas on whats up wtih this?? He is very independent and very into making himself into a person he invisions. also, he is very strong with himself, so i could see him actually having such this STRONG need to make himself into this guy he invisions that he wont let ANYTHING get in the way of that. even love. he is definitly not into himself lookswise and cares NOTHING bout looks. he isnt full of himself, so dont mistake selfish and into himself with full of himself. he must have some sort of problem? to have to build himself into who he visions or he cant be happy with just letting himself not be "perfect" ? Like i said, im insanely in love with him, but that he can be so unhappy with himself to leave me and do things with other girls to get over me, seems like i should say "f*ck him" and move on. but honestly, we are amazing together. have a blast, talk and talk about everything and agree, etc. any advice?? am i just not good enough for him ? also, he has never been in love. and the one time he told me he was , i found out that he wasnt even attracted to her, only saw her 1 a month and didnt long for her ... so what the hell? haha but he told me that he has never felt anything like the way he does for me. plus that he couldnt handle not touching me etc. and has never felt that before. more i talk about this, more i realize he has a huge problem. he is trying to make himself into a robot instead of letting emotions take over. he says "i want sex only 1 a week" but then couldnt keep his hands off me." he spent 1 month breaking up with me, but when i woudl see him i felt how in love he was. he is forcing me away... he doesnt follow what his heart says, he follows his "plan" in making himself into this person. will this ever change? will he really get to that place in life where he feels "ok, now im who i want to be" or will he never be happy. and like i said, dont get me wrong, he is a very kind, fun, adventurous, caring guy with an emotional, sweet side. we have even had a lot of unprotcted sex that neither of us can explain why, and he sees me being the mother to his kids, etc. He is just super wierd, isnt he? More i write, more i realize...
citrusdrop1688 Posted August 8, 2011 Posted August 8, 2011 you shouldnt see him at all. he doesnt deserve it and you dont need to put yourself through that
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