ScienceGal Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 It's not the being alone, it's the knowing I am going to be alone for a long time. I can be patient if I know when something is to be expected. e.g., "the man of your dreams will come around in 2 years". Well that's kinda long and that sucks, but... ok. I guess I can stop thinking about it for now. If only someone could just tell me these things I would not cry half as much. I am dealing with some serious stress and frustration. I am such a loving person and I feel so stifled right now. I feel like I have all of this love with no where to put it. So I decide to fill my time with stuff. But even then I can't always get away from the thought of him... I am volunteering for a local event and without knowing it beforehand, I am working with two people that I met through my ex (and their spouses). And there I am, all alone. I am sure they know about the breakup, so they haven't mentioned him. I am glad for this, but it's still a little dagger to the heart to put on the happy face and act strong. And they're doing the kissy-huggy, volunteering with my partner thing. sigh. keep.it.together. keep.moving.forward.
dumpedandsore Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 It's not the being alone, it's the knowing I am going to be alone for a long time. I can be patient if I know when something is to be expected. e.g., "the man of your dreams will come around in 2 years". Well that's kinda long and that sucks, but... ok. I guess I can stop thinking about it for now. If only someone could just tell me these things I would not cry half as much. I am dealing with some serious stress and frustration. I am such a loving person and I feel so stifled right now. I feel like I have all of this love with no where to put it. So I decide to fill my time with stuff. But even then I can't always get away from the thought of him... I am volunteering for a local event and without knowing it beforehand, I am working with two people that I met through my ex (and their spouses). And there I am, all alone. I am sure they know about the breakup, so they haven't mentioned him. I am glad for this, but it's still a little dagger to the heart to put on the happy face and act strong. And they're doing the kissy-huggy, volunteering with my partner thing. sigh. keep.it.together. keep.moving.forward. i dont know i think i m destined to be single...been so many years, i never have a proper decent t/s im always used and dumped. not that these guys are players, but they were real serious with other girls.. i wonder..is it i simply suck?
smudge21 Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 Don't you're alone with these feelings. Oddly prior to my ex coming along I was fine and happy with being single, just enjoying life and doing what I wanted to do. After she came and went I now feel alone and empty, yet in reality I'm now different than I was before her. I guess that connection we get with someone changes us so much that it's very hard to go back to where we were before them.
antinko Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 You needn't be single, but remember you're fine just the way you are. Others can augment your happiness, but first you must make yourself be happy.
smudge21 Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 You needn't be single, but remember you're fine just the way you are. Others can augment your happiness, but first you must make yourself be happy. Well said.
Author ScienceGal Posted August 6, 2011 Author Posted August 6, 2011 I am happy with me. I am just someone that finds greater happiness when I am in a relationship. It doesn't mean I will be with just anyone for the sake of having someone... It's like Tom Petty sings, the waiting is the hardest part.
Bito Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 Don't you're alone with these feelings. Oddly prior to my ex coming along I was fine and happy with being single, just enjoying life and doing what I wanted to do. After she came and went I now feel alone and empty, yet in reality I'm now different than I was before her. I guess that connection we get with someone changes us so much that it's very hard to go back to where we were before them. The goal its not to get back to who u were before them but to become a new and stronger person. Take the relationship as a learning experience. You know what you want and what you don't want in a mate I know that I am going to be much more wary of red flags. I know I need to follow my gut instinct. I know I don't need to be in a relationship just to validate myself. What have you learned?
Author ScienceGal Posted August 6, 2011 Author Posted August 6, 2011 The goal its not to get back to who u were before them but to become a new and stronger person. Take the relationship as a learning experience. You know what you want and what you don't want in a mate I know that I am going to be much more wary of red flags. I know I need to follow my gut instinct. I know I don't need to be in a relationship just to validate myself. What have you learned? I definitely need to be a stronger person. I feel like I lead with my heart TOO much... and though I don't fall often, I do fall very hard for people. When I see the red flags I ignore them or I lie to myself about them. And I do feel like an awesome person on my own... I just CRAVE that connection. I will get there, I will meet someone who will treat me well... at least that's what I keep telling myself.
Recommended Posts