Desensitized Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Okay, so I told a girl I was seeing that I didn't like her - not even as a friend. And yet apparently, she still isn't getting it. She texted me today asking me if I would see her new apartment (she just moved in on Monday) but do I respond to that? I made it very clear that I don't want to be her friend because of many reasons, but she seems to want to keep talking to me. Why? Is she doing this because she thinks I wasn't serious, or is she doing this because she likes to play games? She's the type of girl that likes to play games, so yeah... Do I respond, or just remain silent? I still haven't broken contact since I've told her that I don't like her and that I don't want to be her friend. If I were to respond, I would say something like this: Hey *******, thanks for the invite, but no thanks. I'd appreciate if you'd respect my wishes of me not wanting to be your friend and stop contacting me. Thanks. Thanks for the advice in advance, guys.
Amanda327 Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Some women are crazy like that!! Id be upfront and tell her to back the Eff off!!
Author Desensitized Posted August 5, 2011 Author Posted August 5, 2011 Some women are crazy like that!! Id be upfront and tell her to back the Eff off!! Well, I thought I was pretty upfront about it before, but I guess I wasn't... Any other advice?
ShatteredReality Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Well, you've already told her...so I simply wouldn't respond. You shouldn't need to keep telling her. And if she's just after attention, then when you respond, even if it's negative, she's getting attention. You might even want to take the extra step and go ahead and block her number / e-mail / Facebook - etc.
CaliBabe Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 i simply wouldn't respond. if you totally blow her off with that message she might go psycho!
Pelican Paw Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Am I missing something here? Most of these posts on this site are from people on the other side of the fence to this particular post and in response we write "be strong" and more in the line of your ex is being a total tosser, now I read this post where the guy has broken up with his g.friend (no reason given) and how she is trying to make contact with him which he is finding annoying/irritating, and what is the response "tell her to eff off" and the like. Please explain ? I just dont' get it or am I at the wrong site ?
without Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Am I missing something here? Most of these posts on this site are from people on the other side of the fence to this particular post and in response we write "be strong" and more in the line of your ex is being a total tosser, now I read this post where the guy has broken up with his g.friend (no reason given) and how she is trying to make contact with him which he is finding annoying/irritating, and what is the response "tell her to eff off" and the like. Please explain ? I just dont' get it or am I at the wrong site ? yeah,right!!! You haven't given any reason and so far you seem kindda cruel...how long have you been with her?what has she done to you? I don't get why everyone just responded like that??
Author Desensitized Posted August 5, 2011 Author Posted August 5, 2011 Perhaps this will clear things up a bit: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t288965/
Kilty Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Ok i have read back and i dont really get it - and by that i mean why you come across as not liking this girl. You havent really went into much details about her apart from she was not contacting you, replying instantly or in detail or in your pocket 24/7 - really need some more background. Also in my opinion the fact you are on here asking for advice on how to deal with someone you "dont like" means that you are kidding yourself on that you dont have any feelings for this girl. Now if it is a simple case that you dont fancy this girl and/or she doesnt turn you on anymore then you do what everyone else does - tell her, break contact, dont reply and keep away from her and out of her life. No matter how much she contacts you after this you ignore it and/or change your number. Pretty simple really. However you have said that this girl is a "sociopath" "noted liar" and all but accused her of sleeping with everyone and anyone. Whether thats true or not it would be better if you could give some background on this as im afraid not replying to a text in the way you like or going a bit cold after saying she loves you in the days that followed is not evidence. She has reached out to you and asked you what she has done wrong - so you had the opportunity to tell her all of her faults and if she had a conscience she would have left you alone or tried to change So im curious as to what this girl has really done to make you dislike her if its more than she doesnt turn you on or find her attractive
Author Desensitized Posted August 5, 2011 Author Posted August 5, 2011 I already made it very clear to her all the reasons of why I don't want to be friends with her. I straight up told her, "hey, I'm sorry, but I cannot be your friend anymore for reasons x,y,and z." I told her about the revelation that I had and how I couldn't think of any reasons of why I used to like her. Also in my opinion the fact you are on here asking for advice on how to deal with someone you "dont like" means that you are kidding yourself on that you dont have any feelings for this girl. I don't have any feelings for this girl, I promise. It's just very annoying because this is about the 4th time this week she's tried contacting me. I have blocked her on Facebook and e-mail, but I was sort of hesitant to change my number because that does cost money. But it seems that that's what I might have to end up doing. So im curious as to what this girl has really done to make you dislike her if its more than she doesnt turn you on or find her attractive Like I said, a revelation happened. I realized that I don't like anything about her, as weird as that may sound. She's pretty much everything I don't like in a person. For example, I don't like: people that party excessively, people that need to carry alcohol everywhere they go to "have a good time", a girl that sleeps with nearly every guy she has a "thing" with, girls that think about sex 24/7, people that disrespect others for no reason, and the list goes on...
Kilty Posted August 5, 2011 Posted August 5, 2011 Cheers It still seems a bit weird that you know someone well, especially of the opposite sex, for 2 years and then all of a sudden decide you dont "like" them overnight and lose 100% feelings Obviously you can fall out of love with someone or get into a rut and get fed up with them etc which is not unusual. And of course you can get beaten down in those two years so often that you decide you have had enough and not want to be friends so you can get over them. Now if she had been partying and sleeping around while she was with you in a relationship then your position would be wholly understandable. But all people have their flaws, especially when they are young. I doubt you will find many LS members who didnt party and jazz it up when they were younger and do crazy stuff - but obviously if you are in a relationship you have to calm that down. And of course people can change especially as they get older. This girl clearly likes you however and has reached out but you know what you need to do so you dont hear anymore from her if thats what you want.
ConfusedT Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 I wouldn't ignore her, but I would be firm with her one last time and tell her that you really DO NOT want to talk to her any longer. Be nice, but firm. Ignoring will get you somewhere eventually, but do you really want to act like that?
Pelican Paw Posted August 6, 2011 Posted August 6, 2011 I read your other post and quite honestly, to me it sounds like the two of you had a friends with benefits relationship - well, that's the way you saw it, she may have seen more into the relationship - and when things started to get a bit too close for comfort - her declaring that she loved you - you bolted and are using the reason that you had been thinking about your relationship and didn't see anything there. Bit odd that you if you had been thinking this before she made the declaration, that you didn't tell her sooner. I'm assuming she must have been given certain signals from you to make such a rather big statement. Either way, I think you need to mature a bit and give your treatment of people a second thought. Even after reading your first post I still dont' know why you are using this platform to seek advice. Bizarre.
Author Desensitized Posted August 6, 2011 Author Posted August 6, 2011 I read your other post and quite honestly, to me it sounds like the two of you had a friends with benefits relationship - well, that's the way you saw it, she may have seen more into the relationship - and when things started to get a bit too close for comfort - her declaring that she loved you - you bolted and are using the reason that you had been thinking about your relationship and didn't see anything there. We did have a FWB thing going on for a while. But honestly, when she told me that she loved me, it didn't make me uncomfortable... Bit odd that you if you had been thinking this before she made the declaration, that you didn't tell her sooner. I'm assuming she must have been given certain signals from you to make such a rather big statement. I would've told her sooner that I felt this way, but like I said, a REVELATION happened. It's just one of those things when you wake up one morning and decide to change something in your life for the better. Like I said, it may sound odd, but it happened. Either way, I know what I'm going to do. I'm just going to keep NC until she finally decides to quit contacting me. Thanks all for the advice, appreciate it. Apologies since this isn't really where this post belongs. - Desensitized
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