Can't Find Love Where I Am. Should I Look for an LDR?

[BellydancerRen]

Has anyone else here sought to specifically find partners long distance for failure to find anyone where you are?

 

I live in the southeastern U.S. I'm from the midwest originally and I have lived in my current city for 14 years.

 

It is very difficult for many single women in this town to find someone to date and I am no exception. A girlfriend of mine who has lived here almost as long as I have, it took her going to Scotland last year for a friend's wedding to find a boyfriend after dating locally for over a decade.

 

I've tried everything over the last 14 years to find a serious relationship but to no avail. Sure I've dated locally but for me dates are very few and far between. I go on a couple of dates once every 2-3 years. The few men I've met locally never wanted anything more than causal dating/casual sex. The only time I've had long-term boyfriends were with men in other states many years ago. Those relationships didn't last either but at least they dated me long-term.

 

I go out, I have an out going personality and I am friendly with everyone. I've done online dating for my city but I simply can't find anyone who wants to date me seriously. As far as looks, I'm 5'6" and a size 4. All I am told is how gorgeous, sexy, smart, and funny I am; and people are surprised when they learn that I don't have anyone.

 

I'm to the point that I'd like to be married. Quite frankly I thought I would have found someone by now and it saddens me that all these years I've been alone.

 

I'm to the point now that I'm considering joining online dating and pen pal sites for the sole purpose of finding someone to date long distance in other states and even other countries. I feel that I don't have an appreciative audience where I am and that perhaps I'd have better luck looking elsewhere.

[eidolon]

I wouldn't look specifically for a LDR. They can be very painful, even at your happiest. Worse than being alone. Online dating is fine, but please look for someone who isn't too far from you. A state or two away at the most. I appreciate that you're looking for something real and serious, and that you're being selective. Good for you.

So go ahead and look through online dating sites like OkCupid, but start local. You never know.

[FitChick]

I want to move so always check out the guys in different places I might like to live. Anyone know which websites Canadians use? I'd like to move to the Calgary area, I think, because of the active outdoor lifestyle. Canada seems more stable economically and safer, too. Ideally, finding a British guy in Canada cuz I love Brits. I'd like to move to the UK but they seem to be in dire straits themselves lately. Who knew that politics and economics would negatively impact my social life?

[Audrina]

I'm in a LDR and it's nothing I would actively look for. It takes a TON of work and is extremely hard. The only reason I'm in one now is because the man I'm with is extraordinary and everything I everything I ever looked for and never thought I would find. He's worth the wait and the patience that goes into this.

[HeavenOrHell]

I wouldn't recommend an LDR, although some do work out, they're really not ideal.

I've found facebook a good way to meet like minded people, if you join groups there with the same interests as yours and chat to people, get involved. Also the Passions sites (PM me if you want the URL).

Sorry you've had no luck so far.

[FitChick]

I'm in a LDR and it's nothing I would actively look for. It takes a TON of work and is extremely hard. The only reason I'm in one now is because the man I'm with is extraordinary and everything I everything I ever looked for and never thought I would find. He's worth the wait and the patience that goes into this.

 

I totally agree.