irock7777 Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 (edited) Hello. My ex and i were talking and together for a total of almost three years. She is about 10 years younger than me. Shes in her early twenties. We had a great relationship. Shes never really been single though. She has been in two two+ year relationships. About 6 or so months ago she start saying she feels like she needs to be sinlge while she is still young. We always gave each other the right amount of space. I tried to give her more even more space but she said she just wanted to be on her own right now. She said she still loves me very much. So thats a little back story. And heres where we are now. . . We still hang out a lot. Sometime we spend full weekend days together. We still hug and flirt and and she feeds me food etc. We are not sexual at all. She is not having sex with anyone. She is just having fun being young and single with her girlfriends. Im still not sure what she wants from me though. We have been "broken up" for about 4 or 5 months now. Her family lives out of town and last month she brought a bunch of our professionally taken photos from a vacation in Jamaica to show them. I thought that was wierd. They were prints so she had to have packed them with her luggage. Her family did not ask her to bring them. She was looking at them and decided to bring them to show. What do you think about that. Would you show almost year old pictures of you ex to your mom and sister if you still didnt have feelings? She didnt tell me she took the pictures. Her mom told me about it cause she found it wierd given we were broken up Ive told her its getting harder for me to be just friends right now. She said she just a lost soul right now and understands if i need to date others. But doesnt want to hear about it if i do. I knew when we first started dating there would come a period where she would want to be single and play with the girls. I didn't think it would be this hard not being with her though. What do you guys think. I'm gonna try dating but shes on my mind a lot. What do you think about her behavior? Sound like there are still feelings there? Edited August 2, 2011 by irock7777
flitzanu Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 walk away, quickly. i went through basically the same nonsense. and also she is in her early 20s, me being 10 years older. she's been honest though, that she wants to be single, likely because all her friends are her age, or she feels she's missing some big part of life that WE have already been through. honestly dude, i wish i could tell you it will be awesome, but the only way she will ever "come back" and that's a big "IF" she does...is for you to WALK away. she has all the benefits of having a boyfriend with none of the responsibility. and the first moment you ever get jealous, she's gonna go psycho on you and remind you how you are NOT dating and she's free to do what she wants. you'll save yourself continued heartache by leaving now. cut ties, no mutual friends, block her on FB, the whole thing. you two broke up, and she needs to realize that "a break" means you aren't in her life.
radiodarcy Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 she has all the benefits of having a boyfriend with none of the responsibility. and the first moment you ever get jealous, she's gonna go psycho on you and remind you how you are NOT dating and she's free to do what she wants. you'll save yourself continued heartache by leaving now. cut ties, no mutual friends, block her on FB, the whole thing. you two broke up, and she needs to realize that "a break" means you aren't in her life. agreed. this is exactly what happened with my ex and he's a guy in his mid-30's -- you'd think he'd know better by now he loved rubbing my nose in the details of his dating life and got pissed off and threatened to end the friendship if i expressed any signs of jealousy. i saved him the trouble and cut off the friendship myself. it's just a way of them keeping their options open while they look for someone better and get their ego boosted in the meantime. don't give her that satisfaction. go NC and don't look back
Jdw_Icequeen Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 My answer is a bit diffrent.. She said strait out she still loves you so asking us if she still has feelings for you is just pointless.. The question I think you really want to ask is if there is a chance you guys will get back together.. Which of course no one can tell you.. Its obvious she isn't interested right now. If you can continue to be her friend and the option or back up plan knowingly. If you can stand to continue to be her friend even if you never get back together, then remain friends. But you have to accept first that your not getting back together and be ok with it if it never happens.. So you can't start getting all angry and jealous when she does start dating again and I assure you she will. Probably sooner then later. If you can't be ok with all that yes you definetly need to get out and distance yourself from this because your setting yourself up to be heart broken.
Author irock7777 Posted August 2, 2011 Author Posted August 2, 2011 (edited) Well she has never blown up or threatened anything when i ask questions. Shes going to Nursing school in Seattle, to be closer to her family, so we have been talking long distance latley. Well see what happens Edited August 2, 2011 by irock7777
leoc1973 Posted August 3, 2011 Posted August 3, 2011 hey guys I can't believe those stories. I am in the same situation. I have pretty much cut most ties to her in an attempt to move on. She did the same thing I am 10 years older but the thing is that I never tried to stop her from doing anything. She booked a vacation to jamaica with her brand new girlfriends I told her I don't know how i feel about it she then dumped me. Told me that I am not going anywhere in life. I was almost done with school I kinda went back mostly for her because I did wanna be able to be someone she was proud of but she couldn't wait another year at most. She took a job a few hundred miles away and just up and forgot about me. LOL the love of my life who tells me that I am her soulmate just dumped me for a couple brand new girlfriends(total skanks too) she was very classy but now I don't even know if I want her back anymore the longer she waits the more I feel like I can go on without her. I used to think about her and look at her as if she was an angel sent to me from god or something but now I don't know if I would even be able to look at her the same way. Just thinking of how she probably has given herself to some slimeball player just looking to get his dick wet. When I was with her I never even though of another woman... has not ever even crossed my mind. Now I am having the time of my life. I met some new girls and they are great I feel alive again! I am not going to tell you to move on because to be honest I don't even know what I would do right not but the longer she waits the more chance she has of losing me(her soulmate:her words) forever!
Recommended Posts