a womans worth

[luvsickpuppy]

Okay, so no one replied to my previous post, so I made a decision on my own. For those who don't know after a very bumpy relationship, he and I are on a very awkward break. I say its awkward because, I don't want it, he claims he doesn't want it, but here we are. I've been stressing that I think he doesn't want a relationship any more, just doesnt want to say it out loud.

Well the other night I was hoping to lay my insecurity to rest I... well I spied on him. I waited outside of a movie theater, and to my dismay there was girl who exited with him.. he called me immediately after dropping her off. Yea, he just dropped her off. I don't know if it was platonic or like a test date to see that he really wasn't ready to let us go. Because that night he told me things he hadn't said in a while. He bluntly said he loved me, he needs me and he really wants us to work out, but the break is still much needed.

With that said I decided not to tell him what I saw.

I'm confused though, because I know distance is needed, but is being cold? When we talk on the phone he sounds irritable, he lives next to my mother as I was leaving I saw him sitting out side. I drove up and gave him our special wave, and he just looked down. I called him, and he was angry because from the time I drove to her house the back by his was too short so it looked like I was "watching him" we talked for a moment and he said he loves seeing me, he loves hearing from me, it truly makes his day, but he's really busy with his day off and I'm slowing him down... He was sitting outside playing with his dogs. Any who shortly later I was in Walmart, and saw him we both looked at eachother, and I smiled and he looked at me almost angry to see me. I text him saying, you looked really upset. He replied. Busy. Too busy to smile?

A previous ex was in town and asked to spend the day with me. It's been years since we've been together, but he's never fallen out of love with me. We went to lunch, took the kids to the park, and he knows I don't feel for him any more but I wanted to cry because it felt so good to be treated like a lady, treated with respect, and appreciation for the little things I do. I miss when my love treated me like that. Ive been told over and over that I can do better. Today I started to think maybe their right. I love him with every beat of my heart, I quite literally would do anything for him, but when is it going to come back to me

[SincereOnlineGuy]

It sounds like the best thing you can do is to stay with the program and continue to respect the 'break" request.

 

Far too often, the party who did NOT initiate the break reacts in ways that further aggravate the one who did initiate the break-up. That results in a stronger resolve on behalf of the one who initiated the break-up, to end the relationship.

 

As to what you 'saw', until such time as when you find that woman to be 'significant', I would just stop dwelling on her.

 

Just be strong, for the time being, and hope for the best. (I know there will be some tough challenges that way)

[coltsfan1]

It sounds like the best thing you can do is to stay with the program and continue to respect the 'break" request.

 

Far too often, the party who did NOT initiate the break reacts in ways that further aggravate the one who did initiate the break-up. That results in a stronger resolve on behalf of the one who initiated the break-up, to end the relationship.

 

As to what you 'saw', until such time as when you find that woman to be 'significant', I would just stop dwelling on her.

 

Just be strong, for the time being, and hope for the best. (I know there will be some tough challenges that way)

 

 

This is very good advice and has been proven true in my situation.

[luvsickpuppy]

First off, thank you for replying I didn't think anyone would. I'm trying to push myself away, beside the fact that he wants me to, I want him to miss all the good things that come along with being with me. And hopefully he will see what he's been doing wrong too. I know I'm not perfect, I know I have a fair share in this, but forgetting his contribution makes me feel... kinda low.

[KathyM]

Okay, so no one replied to my previous post, so I made a decision on my own. For those who don't know after a very bumpy relationship, he and I are on a very awkward break. I say its awkward because, I don't want it, he claims he doesn't want it, but here we are. I've been stressing that I think he doesn't want a relationship any more, just doesnt want to say it out loud.

Well the other night I was hoping to lay my insecurity to rest I... well I spied on him. I waited outside of a movie theater, and to my dismay there was girl who exited with him.. he called me immediately after dropping her off. Yea, he just dropped her off. I don't know if it was platonic or like a test date to see that he really wasn't ready to let us go. Because that night he told me things he hadn't said in a while. He bluntly said he loved me, he needs me and he really wants us to work out, but the break is still much needed.

With that said I decided not to tell him what I saw.

I'm confused though, because I know distance is needed, but is being cold? When we talk on the phone he sounds irritable, he lives next to my mother as I was leaving I saw him sitting out side. I drove up and gave him our special wave, and he just looked down. I called him, and he was angry because from the time I drove to her house the back by his was too short so it looked like I was "watching him" we talked for a moment and he said he loves seeing me, he loves hearing from me, it truly makes his day, but he's really busy with his day off and I'm slowing him down... He was sitting outside playing with his dogs. Any who shortly later I was in Walmart, and saw him we both looked at eachother, and I smiled and he looked at me almost angry to see me. I text him saying, you looked really upset. He replied. Busy. Too busy to smile?

A previous ex was in town and asked to spend the day with me. It's been years since we've been together, but he's never fallen out of love with me. We went to lunch, took the kids to the park, and he knows I don't feel for him any more but I wanted to cry because it felt so good to be treated like a lady, treated with respect, and appreciation for the little things I do. I miss when my love treated me like that. Ive been told over and over that I can do better. Today I started to think maybe their right. I love him with every beat of my heart, I quite literally would do anything for him, but when is it going to come back to me

I think he doesn't know what he wants. It looks like he intends to date other girls to try to determine what he wants. He still wants to keep you strung along while he "finds himself". He gets irritated with you sometimes because he is trying to keep you at arm's length until he figures out what he wants.

[flitzanu]

you do understand "break" means "breakup" right? why do you think he is treating you like an acquaintance everytime you run into him or try to talk to him?

 

break = i want to sleep with other people.