ziggue Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 Last year. My ex boyfriend and I were living together, talking about having a life together. I was financially supporting him while he was on a Traineeship getting he's **** together. It was too hard for us living together in the City while he was on Trainee wage so he quits and gets a job with full wage. Get made to believe that this guy has no money. He at first was only giving me $150 for everything while I was paying the rest. For Rent, Food and Bills. After he gets this full time job. I am still being told he can't afford **** and still get stuck paying for our joint bills. When things were supposed to be split down the middle between us. I supported him through all this last year. Never nagged, pushed or forced him to do stuff. We only have a few arguments. Going through a bit of a rough patch. Some over things that were even hypocritical on he's part. This all started two months after he started working at he's new job. All of a sudden, after another fight, he and walks out. Not wanting to talk it through it or anything. This went on in December 2010. It is now August 2011 and I now find out he is married to someone else. 8 months later. What a slap in the face. Weird though. 4 months earlier he was texting me he loved me and wanted me back. . After all I did for him. He never took any of the good I did into consideration after walking out on me. He just gives up. Feel pretty duped. I helped him to help our future together. Not just for him to have a future with some other chick. It just feels like I got shafted. I helped him when he was struggling and he never gave a ****. Now everything is so much better for him. I mean. He was living at he's Mum's place with a ****ty job before. Now look at him. Just hate how I helped get him there in a way and he never appreciated it. I do not even know how he could afford a wedding and all this stuff while apparently, being in dept with me. How do I cope with the feelings of being betrayed and used like this?
coltsfan1 Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 How do I cope with the feelings of being betrayed and used like this? The answer to this question is simple yet can be very difficult. You first have to forgive your ex and yourself, no healing will occur if you do not do these two things first. Then my advice is to start putting goals together for yourself, begin with small ones then move to a larger goal. Time and a simple plan will replace the feelings you have for your ex. Please listen to the advice on this forum, it will help you, and if you do not do this you will end up writing a thread like the one below. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t290214/
shayla Posted August 2, 2011 Posted August 2, 2011 Except his wedding was 3 months later.... HA I funded his other relationship! I was the reason he could afford a ring for that other woman, yeah, I was very pissed for a long time. This happened 10 months ago and I am just now to the point that he can cross my mind and I don't get fighting mad. I didn't forgive him or her. I forgave myself for allowing myself to ignore the feelings in the pit of my stomach, the premonitions, the nightmares that were screaming at me to get out of this relationship. But I was sooo sure that I'd never meet another man "at my age" so I had to just soldier on... But just know that in time, and it may be a long time, but you will get through all this, and look back on it as a speed bump and nothing more. Your anger will burn off. One thing that you don't want to do is get into the habit of being angry. That probably doesn't make sense. But you can be angry for so long, that you continue to be negative, and you don't realize that you aren't angry any more. Just like anything else that you do for a long time, you can be at autopilot because it's what you are used to. If you get into that habit, you can become bitter, and it will affect every other relationship you get into, and the man that betrayed you stays in power of your life. He does not deserve that satisfaction. Good luck.
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