donelly1 Posted August 1, 2011 Posted August 1, 2011 I dated my ex for about 1 and a half years and after being broken up for 3 months I have recently been hanging out with her again. Its been several weeks since I met up with my ex and I still havent cut contact with my ex. The only reason I got back in contact with her was because she said she wanted to get back together but she is lately confused and wont commit to dating again. I have made it a point to always put friends and other things as a priority instead of my ex. I thought that as long as she didnt get in the way of other things like me developing a social circle in my new city that it would be alright to be in touch with her but I am finding out that even that is not working Things are going well for me other than my situation with my ex but lately it has been on my mind so much which is why I wanted to post here. She has been still acting confused towards me sending me late night texts that she misses me and calling me every so often sending flirty messages but not ever saying she wants to get back together. Lately I had a talk with one of her best friends who Im also friends with. She brought up the topic of me and my ex and it was good to talk to her, but she told me that she thought my ex was being kinda flaky about the whole thing too. The next time I see her its gonna be 2 weeks from now and I think that will be the last time. She booked this bus tour thing and so Im gonna do that with her and then afterwards I plan to finally say goodbye to her. I know I could just go cold turkey and not talk to her now but I feel like it would be best to say it to her in person and then leave it at that. I wanna be mature about it and tell her that I really had a great time while I was with her but that obviously we both feel differently now so its probably best not to talk or stay in touch for a long time. I gave it another shot and really put a lot on the line as I have been in touch with her now for a few weeks but things are not improving and I feel like I basically was burned yet again by her. I guess I was just hoping that things would come around but I now think that I need to just cut lose. I cant move on or date anyone new if I always have this weird sort of friends with benefits situation with my ex. Ultimatly its my situation but I was curious if anyone has any advice or similar experience. Its been on my mind all the time for the last week or so... I thought that love deserved a 2nd chance so I tried. In some cases maybe it deserves many chances but Im not sure I can give it a 3rd chance because of how bad it feels. Its just hard to say goodbye. How do you say good-bye for good to someone you love, and what do you say to them when it might be the last time that you will ever see them?
wilsonx Posted August 1, 2011 Posted August 1, 2011 You don't need to, she broke up with you and said Good bye. That should be the end of it. I see nothing there but her using you as a plan B just incase her plan A doesn't work. She gets to have her cake and eat it to because you wont go NC and start to heal and move on. Shes not your friend anymore. She terminated the friendship the second she broke up with you. Whatever she has to say to your or her wants are no longer relevant. Dont be her security blanket and move on. If you would have gone NC when she broke up with you, you would be a month a head of me in the healing process. Now your still at day 0.
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