nyc_guy2003 Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 Not to be crude, but I agree with the previous posters about the story not adding up, especially the part where you can date a hispanic woman for 2 months without having sex.
Mme. Chaucer Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 She is supposed to cook on command, exactly what you order? Are you a customer? You physically manhandled her because she failed to provide Stove-top Stuffing in a timely manner? If you're for real, I fear for humanity. But anyway, the fiery latin babe dodged a bullet. And I hope for your sake she didn't go home with any bruises on her body from your assault, or else you might have to watch out for her dad and brothers coming after you for retribution. Which would be cool.
sm1tten Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 Issues, you have them. I mean, it's one thing to be disappointed that apparently she can't do this thing you wanted her to do - cooking. It's totally another thing to throw a temper tantrum over it. But I can't say I'm surprised because it was obvious from your other thread (about some guy talking to your girlfriend in Spanish) that you don't know how to handle your temper OR your woman properly.
TaurusTerp Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 On the one hand, you are ****ing bizzare for dumping a woman over this and making it into such a big deal. On the other hand, I do usually lose a little respect for anyone, man or woman, who can't cook at all. It speaks to an inability to take care of oneself. Same with not knowing how to do simple household things.
FitChick Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 Geez, I was expecting "The Big Lie" to be her having kids when she said she didn't have any. Now, that is a lie worth dumping someone for, not for being unable to cook. Nowadays, you don't really need to cook with all the ready meals and frozen meals out there. Perhaps the OP should have offered to pay for cooking classes for his girlfriend. Maybe he should date a culinary student. Brace yourselves everyone for the upcoming threads about how the OP can't meet any women or how all the women who can cook are fat!
KathyM Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 I think the OP has every right to be upset and feel that he has been duped by this woman. He made it clear from the start that a woman who can cook was something that was important to him. She misrepresented herself in order to win him over. That's dishonest, and not a good way to start off a relationship. She should have been honest with him from the start so he can decide if that's a relationship he would want to pursue. And I don't blame a guy for wanting a woman who knows how to cook. If he wants a real relationship where they may eventually get married, cooking is an important skill to bring to the marriage. Nothing worse than having to come home from work to a frozen, prepackaged and microwaved dinner every night, or having to go out every night for dinner. That gets old pretty fast, and men are wise to take into consideration the long term when starting to date someone. I think both partners should be able to at least do basic cooking. If a partner is not even willing to try, that's a deal breaker for a lot of people. Not only does this woman not know how to cook, but wouldn't even try, and lied about it from the start. Not a good risk for a relationship.
snug.bunny Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 The good news is, preparing meals can be learned, with practice. The bad news is, the lie. Is lying about cooking something that can be resolved/forgiven? In this case, it doesn't appear so.... This angered me and an argument ensued with her screaming at me in Spanish, which she knows I don't understand, so I try to contain my temper by telling her to just get out before it escalates. She has a little bit of a temper herself so she tells me to make her get out so I grab her by the arm, which she tries to fight, but it's useless, and I heave her on my shoulders (she's 5' 115lb) and drop her outside the door. After slamming and locking it, she bangs a couple times and screams some more in Spanish, followed by a barrage of silly texts which I ignore.
Feelsgoodman Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 She is supposed to cook on command, exactly what you order? Are you a customer? You physically manhandled her because she failed to provide Stove-top Stuffing in a timely manner? If you're for real, I fear for humanity. But anyway, the fiery latin babe dodged a bullet. And I hope for your sake she didn't go home with any bruises on her body from your assault, or else you might have to watch out for her dad and brothers coming after you for retribution. Which would be cool. Well, technically, she was refusing to leave his house upon being told to do so. By remaining on the premises contrary to the wishes on the owner, she was committing trespass. Under such circumstances, using reasonable force to evict the trespasser is justifiable. Heck, in some U.S. states, you can legally shoot trespassers . As for dad and brothers coming after him for retribution, you can definitely shoot people in self-defence in America. Which would be cool.
KathyM Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 Well, how hard is it to fix a package of stuffing mix? I'm sure he wasn't asking her to prepare something difficult. She should have at least tried. I think that would have gone a long way with the guy if she at least made an attempt. But she couldn't even try to follow simple directions, and then made a big fuss when he was not pleased with her dishonesty and lack of effort. She should have at least apologized at that point for misrepresenting herself. That might have made a difference in his reaction. He maybe should have just cut the date short and not called her again, rather than make a big scene, but I don't blame him for making this a deal breaker.
Lucky_One Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 Dude: I am glad you dumped her. You made her an enormous favor. It was very kind of you to end the relationship. She will be better off with someone else.:sick: LIKE!!! :bunny:
serial muse Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 I thought this was interesting...Tayla is prophetic: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=3462779&postcount=5
Andy_K Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 So we're supposed to believe a guy who is willing to wait 2+ months for sex will dump a girl for not cooking dinner?
Feelsgoodman Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 So we're supposed to believe a guy who is willing to wait 2+ months for sex will dump a girl for not cooking dinner? Everyone snaps at some point Doesn't have sex, doesn't cook dinner...what exactly is the purpose of having a girlfriend like that?
Ross MwcFan Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 Why would anyone want to date a woman that can't cook?? Because most guys can cook themselves.
Ross MwcFan Posted August 15, 2011 Posted August 15, 2011 On the one hand, you are ****ing bizzare for dumping a woman over this and making it into such a big deal. On the other hand, I do usually lose a little respect for anyone, man or woman, who can't cook at all. It speaks to an inability to take care of oneself. Same with not knowing how to do simple household things. What if they're retarded?
Mme. Chaucer Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 A person saying that they "can cook" does not equate to a person being willing to cook on demand exactly what is "ordered." I certainly can cook, and do most every day - and a hilarious scene would certainly ensue at my house if S were to hand me a box of Stove Top Stuffing and demand that I prepare it and quick because he is "famish" and he wants to watch a game and go to a park! Oh ho ho ho! Shaundro, you showed this girl that you are still the very creepy jerk who tried to intimidate her during her workday a while back. I hope she knows that she doesn't need this kind of crap. Nobody does.
Author Shaun-Dro Posted August 16, 2011 Author Posted August 16, 2011 Wait, I thought you already did. So you're saying you're not really over her? You guys didn't even have sex! We only dated 2 months. Who wants a dame that lays down so quickly? I certainly don't! And I'll admit it, I'm not over her. I wanted to make love to her eventually and I wanted it to be special between us with nothing but honesty but it's clear that it was a fantasy built in my head since she lied. I know it seems like a white lie to you guys, but a lie is a lie no matter the situation and because I have a bad temper (which I'm trying to control) as well as she, things blew up pretty quickly. I'm at the crossroads right now on what to do with her because I had a dream about her last night. Damn, I wish I hadn't.
Zaphod B Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 (edited) You seem like a sexist pig. I agree with another poster here, you're doing her a favour. Hopefully she'll find someone more respectful towards her not someone who demands she cook for him at 3pm in the afternoon. Edited August 16, 2011 by Zaphod B
Author Shaun-Dro Posted August 16, 2011 Author Posted August 16, 2011 You seem like a sexist pig. I agree with another poster here, you're doing her a favour. Hopefully she'll find someone more respectful towards her not someone who demands she cook for him at 3pm in the afternoon. Go back to New Zealand and grow crops before you starve.
SoleMate Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 Everyone snaps at some point...."Doesn't have sex, doesn't cook dinner"...what exactly is the purpose of having a girlfriend like that? Ermm... companionship? Is that even a possibility at this point?
Feelsgoodman Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 Ermm... companionship? Is that even a possibility at this point? Companionship? Isn't that what friends and family are for?
BetheButterfly Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 (edited) Many Latinas do not cook from boxes... they tend to use family recipes where they don't even use measuring cups... they just know how much of what to put in based on taste and experience, and watching their loved ones cook. It is possible your ex girlfriend knows how to cook food that her family likes, based on her roots. She probably never saw your box of stuffing before, and probably was not particularly pleased at making it, hence her question if you were sure. Many Latinos I know would sniff at a box of stuffing, but would be highly pleased with fajitas... nicely cooked meat with veggies, corn tortillas, and rice/beans on the side. A box of stuffing wouldn't cut it for many people, including me. So, I think you did wrong. About her lie... so maybe she doesn't know how to cook, not even ethnic food, but maybe she does. I would highly suggest calling her, apologizing for throwing her out of the house, and see if she would like to talk to you about it. Maybe she will say she doesn't know how to cook anything, or maybe she will say that she knows how to cook food her family likes, and not stuff in a box... Anyways, you really got to work at that temper, and learn how to resolve conflict without taking extremes. Throwing a women out of the house just for not cooking a box of stuffing is really sad. On a second thought, I think it's best if you don't call her, and get some counseling, cause seriously, I worry for any woman who has a boyfriend who would be so callous as to do something like that. I'd be worried you might hurt her in other ways. Throwing anybody out of the house is a very harsh emotional hit. I'd be traumatized if my fiance ever did that to me. Edited August 16, 2011 by BetheButterfly
musemaj11 Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 And real men know how to fix the pipes, drive a tractor and build a house from scratch, am I right? Sounds like someone gets offended because she is one of those 'I can cook you anything as long as its instant food' women.
Stung Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 Many Latinas do not cook from boxes... they tend to use family recipes where they don't even use measuring cups... they just know how much of what to put in based on taste and experience, and watching their loved ones cook. It is possible your ex girlfriend knows how to cook food that her family likes, based on her roots. She probably never saw your box of stuffing before, and probably was not particularly pleased at making it, hence her question if you were sure. The above is my experience with many Latina cooks as well. Also my former Asian girlfriend was a phenomenal Thai and Chinese cook and would laugh at anyone who expected her to cook up a box of rice, because that is not the "right" way to make rice for good Asian food--and if you gave her a box of stuffing, she would be like, ugh, wtf. OP, I would have sympathy for your being upset that she lied--if her cooking is important to you, fine, that's one of your preferences, and I'm not on board with lying as a general rule. However, it's totally unclear whether you actually questioned her about her style of cooking and what was actually going on in that kitchen, or just made assumptions and then started yelling because she was unfamiliar with your stuffing. Not every culture and kitchen embraces boxes of bread stuffing, FYI, and the girl is twenty years old, it wouldn't be that weird for her to only know a few tried-and-true family dishes. In any case you escalated things way beyond where they needed to go by yelling at her and picking her up bodily to throw her out of your house. If I were her, I would never speak to you again, and if you came into MY house you would very possibly be greeted by something pointy.
sally4sara Posted August 16, 2011 Posted August 16, 2011 I'm sorry but what kind of grown ass person can't figure out how to make abox of stuffing? It is so easy and the directions are on the box with pictures to aid you I don't even have a box in front of me and I could still explain it to an 8year old. A cup and three fourths water, a tablespoon of butter, heat to a boil and add the stuff in the packet to the water and put the lid on the pot. Turn off the heat and wait. I don't care what ethnicity you are, you can't excuse that level of stupidity with your ethnic background. But the stupidity kept going as the OP and his GF went on to act like unruly children over it all. Neither is ready for a grown up relationship.
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