The Inituition Posted July 31, 2011 Posted July 31, 2011 Okay folks, I need some help. Me and my SO are in a relationship for almost half a year now and while I knew about this for a while now, it only started bothering me more now. My SO's ex is a supposedly good friend of hers, and while I trust her completely when she tells me that, I don't trust her ex one bit. He avoids talking to me, he started coming over to my SO's house to hang out with her/her brother almost every day, and if I talk with my SO over the webcam and he's over there, he starts b*tching about it. Do you think he's planning something? I am almost sure he still has feelings for her (even though he was told it's over by my SO, due to him being such an ass). What should I do about this? Should I just let it be? If so, how do I cope with it myself? Thanks!
SillyS Posted July 31, 2011 Posted July 31, 2011 Why do we all attract so much drama in our lives? He is an ass to her, breaks up with her, and then she lets him come over to her house. What is the point of doing that really? What is she gaining from that, other than upsetting you unnecessarily and putting herself in an awkward position. Tell her how you feel. If she has feelings for him, then she should not waste your time. If she doesn't, then she needs to create boundaries with her ex to allow your relationship space to grow.
HeavenOrHell Posted July 31, 2011 Posted July 31, 2011 From her ex's behaviour I wouldn't trust him, she does need to set boundaries with him now that she is with you. I asked my partner to set boundaries with his ex as she was staying every w/end at his place and other stuff I wasn't happy with, I told him him what I felt was acceptable and what I could deal with, so we have a compromise now, I don't feel my partner's ex wants him back, however, she has been too emotionally dependent on him and I wasn't happy with it. If she wanted him back then I would probably say to him (if she were acting like your partner's ex) that I don't want her seeing him as much as he is clearly disrespecting you, and she is disrespecting you by letting her ex bitch about you, it's out of order and not something you should put up with, nor have to. No, you shouldn't just let it be, you should tell her he's disrespecting you and that it looks like he wants her back, and that you'd rather she saw less of him, but make it clear you trust her. She's being quite naive by the sounds of it, expecting you to be ok with it. Okay folks, I need some help. Me and my SO are in a relationship for almost half a year now and while I knew about this for a while now, it only started bothering me more now. My SO's ex is a supposedly good friend of hers, and while I trust her completely when she tells me that, I don't trust her ex one bit. He avoids talking to me, he started coming over to my SO's house to hang out with her/her brother almost every day, and if I talk with my SO over the webcam and he's over there, he starts b*tching about it. Do you think he's planning something? I am almost sure he still has feelings for her (even though he was told it's over by my SO, due to him being such an ass). What should I do about this? Should I just let it be? If so, how do I cope with it myself? Thanks!
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