Sweetheartt Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Hey do u ppl remember that guy that came up to me out of the blue and asked me out? This happened earlier this month & I tried to just be friends & and he rejected it so its like w/e right? Anyway, my friend called me last night & told me that he spoke to her around the way because he lives in our neighborhood & asked questions about me???? This really freaked me out because ever since he didnt wanna be friends & stuff he starts ignoring me & pretending to not see me but now out of the blue again he's staring at me hard! Im like omg wtf is this? This happened earlier this morning when I was out watering the yard, he was across the street sitting on a car staring at me. I turned my back, ran back inside & called my friend about it. She said if he tries to approach me again to just call the police. I havent told anyone else yet because Im so confused! I mean, whats his problem? Please help!
mooseman Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 His asking questions about you was odd, and the sitting in the car thing is disturbing. Yes, treat this as though he is stalking you, until you are sure he's gone away for good. Do call the police if he shows up somewhere, if for no other reason than to get these instances documented. Ultimately, if it continues, consider getting an order of protection from a court.
Enchanted Girl Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 How angry was he when you rejected him? Did he seem like he could become violent? If so, then he's an emotionally unstable individual who could hurt you and probably is stalking you. If not, I wouldn't jump to conclusions that he is stalking you yet.
Author Sweetheartt Posted July 30, 2011 Author Posted July 30, 2011 How angry was he when you rejected him? Did he seem like he could become violent? If so, then he's an emotionally unstable individual who could hurt you and probably is stalking you. If not, I wouldn't jump to conclusions that he is stalking you yet. Um, Idk, he kinda seemed surprised that I said no but I had to because I didnt know who he was at first & he just asked me out on the spot. After I told him we could just be friends that was really my way of trying to get to know him a little bit before I decide whats what later he flatout shook his head & said no thanks & just walked away. I saw him a few times in the mall where I go because we live close to the mall in CT & he pretended to not see me. I said ok w/e & just went on w/ my life until I saw him today & he just sat there on the car & watched me really hard w/o saying anything ??? Im kinda scared because lots of guys are acting creepy lately like staring at me & never saying anything but I never see them again so Im like w/e, but this guy lives close by so Im a little worried right now. Its kinda like he changed his mind again or something Idk.
mooseman Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Always obey your instincts. If you feel worried about your safety, always err on the side of caution and get the police involved.
Shaun-Dro Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 I know exactly what's going on here. The loser finally got over things and is now starting up again. See, the thing is, I feel he's built you up within his mind to be the "one" which explains why he just walked up to you and asked you out so bluntly, without getting to know you. His mental build up of you was probably strictly physical attraction as you might've fit the exact mold of what he's looking for. I'm sure he liked you a long time before getting the courage to approach. When he did, that was when you rejected him, which he couldn't handle, so friendship was out! Why? Because he needed time to process the rejection. He was hurt by it because he probably doesn't ask girls out usually, so the pain stings where he isn't used to it. If he dealt with women on a regular basis he would've known that women look for any silly, nonexistent reason to reject men. I think he's young, like you (19 right?) and doesn't put himself out there like he ought to in order to experience how you women operate. Over the past few weeks since your encounter, he hasn't gotten you out of his head, so he began asking questions about you to your friend. This guy doesn't have the sense to do things right because he's obsessed with you now, and since he knows there's no chance of ever being with you as your boyfriend, etc. he's gonna just sit there, watch you, and sulk. So yes, be alert and keep an eye on him. He's definitely unstable. I don't advise getting the police involved until he actually approaches you again to your extreme discomfort, and harasses you. Only then will the cops come into the matter for your safety. Other than that, just try to stay away, be vigilant, and mindful. Another thing: try to tone down the cute little outfits you like to wear out here in the summer. I know you want attention and all, you're young, but if this is getting "creepy" guys staring at you and not saying anything, you would be smart to lessen the cock-teasing maneuver.
Enchanted Girl Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Um, Idk, he kinda seemed surprised that I said no but I had to because I didnt know who he was at first & he just asked me out on the spot. After I told him we could just be friends that was really my way of trying to get to know him a little bit before I decide whats what later he flatout shook his head & said no thanks & just walked away. I saw him a few times in the mall where I go because we live close to the mall in CT & he pretended to not see me. I said ok w/e & just went on w/ my life until I saw him today & he just sat there on the car & watched me really hard w/o saying anything ??? Im kinda scared because lots of guys are acting creepy lately like staring at me & never saying anything but I never see them again so Im like w/e, but this guy lives close by so Im a little worried right now. Its kinda like he changed his mind again or something Idk. People look at people they find attractive. It doesn't make them creepy or stalkers. The reason stalkers are bad is because they are emotionally and physically abusive to their victims. So far, I wouldn't say he's done anything too alarming. He's just an idiot. A guy *I* rejected calls me in the middle of the night at least once a week and asks me sexual questions and *I* don't even consider him a stalker even though I have to tell him all the time to knock it off and that I'm not interested in him. He's just feeling desperate. Until it gets to the point where he's literally only obsessed with just me and will try to physically hurt me or emotionally hurt me if I say no, I'm not worried. It's not really a big deal. And I agree with the ending of what Shaun-Dro said. I wore a top yesterday that shows a lot of cleavage because I was hanging out with my boyfriend and wanted to do it for his sake. Several men stared at my chest during the day, but I didn't make a big deal about it. No, they weren't the intended audience, but if I'm going to put them out there, it's not the end of the world that they noticed they were there.
daphne Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Another thing: try to tone down the cute little outfits you like to wear out here in the summer. I know you want attention and all, you're young, but if this is getting "creepy" guys staring at you and not saying anything, you would be smart to lessen the cock-teasing maneuver. Your entire post was elaborate and disturbing. This was the most. How about you back off the creepy when giving a girl advice?
Author Sweetheartt Posted July 30, 2011 Author Posted July 30, 2011 Your entire post was elaborate and disturbing. This was the most. How about you back off the creepy when giving a girl advice? No his post actually sounds almost right I think. Were u like that before? I wonder but obviously your not now from the things u say. But anyway, Im not a cocktease. I dont smile & flirt w/ guys & then leave them there like a mean bitch. I just like to dress nice & cool because its hot out here. Its like 85-90 degrees right now & Im going out tonight w/ my friends so Im gonna look nice then to. I dont think its fair to have to change my clothes because some guys cant handle it lol. Im gonna follow some advices on watching out for this other guy in case he tries anything. My friends already knows & I told my sister about it so we're in this together
daphne Posted July 31, 2011 Posted July 31, 2011 No his post actually sounds almost right I think. Were u like that before? I wonder but obviously your not now from the things u say. But anyway, Im not a cocktease. I dont smile & flirt w/ guys & then leave them there like a mean bitch. I just like to dress nice & cool because its hot out here. Its like 85-90 degrees right now & Im going out tonight w/ my friends so Im gonna look nice then to. I dont think its fair to have to change my clothes because some guys cant handle it lol. Im gonna follow some advices on watching out for this other guy in case he tries anything. My friends already knows & I told my sister about it so we're in this together I think you're missing the point. A guy that can give you a detailed play by play on what the "stalker" guy's thinking, is one that has the same twisted thoughts. And him suggesting that a girl getting stalked could be a cocktease is most disturbing of all.
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