coltsfan1 Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 My opinion is yes, unless you get contact along the lines of I made a mistake. Justt depends on how ugly the break up was...
smudge21 Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Every situation is different and it does depend on how bad the dumping was - did they cheat etc. However, sometimes you can break NC if it feels the right thing to do. It's your judgement really. NC is a guideline, not a rule. You follow it so you can heal. I recently broke NC because my ex reached out for help with some issues in her life. The break up was mutual and I still consider her a friend, so in my eyes, breaking NC was the right thing to do. Your choice, but if breaking NC sets you back and makes no changes, then don't do it. Think things through first and alway sleep on a decision.
Author without Posted July 30, 2011 Author Posted July 30, 2011 Honestly I don't want to break it.Cuz I think I deserved a good explanation and I got hurt deeply. And about a week after the BU i sent him an email telling him I love him(I felt maybe he doesn't truely know i do,despite telling him many times before ), and if he is in a bad situation (he told me he was but no whys) I understand It's ok if you want some time alone ,he didn't answer back.
smudge21 Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 He didn't answer back. There's you answer. Sorry, but you have to accept that. If you keep contacting him he will lose all respect for you, simple as that. He knows how you feel, knows how to contact you... so step back and let him make the decision. Believe I was not one for NC, never believed in it. But if there are still feelings there on behalf of the dumper, NC will make them miss you. Constant contact just pushes them further away. I've been nearly 6 months NC and recently my ex has got in touch and some revelations have come up that she has been missing me more than I've been missing her. It's like, just after the breakup, the dumpee does all the missing... but then the dumpee heals via NC and then it's the dumper who starts doing the missing. Now please understand I am not saying this will happen to you and you should not go NC hoping that it will, but you must stay NC and concentrate on your own healing now. I know that's hard, almost impossible at times, but stick with it. No one knows what the future holds.
Author without Posted July 30, 2011 Author Posted July 30, 2011 He didn't answer back. There's you answer. Sorry, but you have to accept that. If you keep contacting him he will lose all respect for you, simple as that. He knows how you feel, knows how to contact you... so step back and let him make the decision. Believe I was not one for NC, never believed in it. But if there are still feelings there on behalf of the dumper, NC will make them miss you. Constant contact just pushes them further away. I've been nearly 6 months NC and recently my ex has got in touch and some revelations have come up that she has been missing me more than I've been missing her. It's like, just after the breakup, the dumpee does all the missing... but then the dumpee heals via NC and then it's the dumper who starts doing the missing. Now please understand I am not saying this will happen to you and you should not go NC hoping that it will, but you must stay NC and concentrate on your own healing now. I know that's hard, almost impossible at times, but stick with it. No one knows what the future holds. Do You agree if someone truly cares for you,they will talk to you and tell you what is wrong and make it work?
smudge21 Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Yeah, I guess, but also people can really care but not be in love. I still cared deeply for my previous ex yet still ended it. The feelings weren't strong enough to maintain the relationship. Whatever is going on with him right now you have to concentrate on yourself. You don't know how he's feeling right now or what is going on, so don't think about it. Doing so will only make you feel worse. As I said, he knows how you feel and how to contact you. Give it a few weeks and then see how you feel.
Author without Posted July 30, 2011 Author Posted July 30, 2011 Yeah, I guess, but also people can really care but not be in love. I still cared deeply for my previous ex yet still ended it. The feelings weren't strong enough to maintain the relationship. Whatever is going on with him right now you have to concentrate on yourself. You don't know how he's feeling right now or what is going on, so don't think about it. Doing so will only make you feel worse. As I said, he knows how you feel and how to contact you. Give it a few weeks and then see how you feel. Thanks,smudge21
smudge21 Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 Stay strong - one thing I've learnt from my 6 months being here and from reading all these posts is that no matter how bad things are, they always get better.
xeros Posted July 30, 2011 Posted July 30, 2011 If you want to get over them as quick as possible get your closure and your stuff and get the hell out of their life in every way possible.
Sugarkane Posted July 31, 2011 Posted July 31, 2011 In my case my ex/ dumper was so completely rude and cruel to me, that it wasn't worth breaking NC over. I was already hurt more than enough.
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