TheDovic Posted July 29, 2011 Posted July 29, 2011 (edited) My ex broke up with me almost three weeks ago. We had recently bought a house, plus we were due to get married this year. She was working three jobs all year (she didn't have to - was just really stressed about everything in her life and couldn't see we didn't need the money). She has very low self esteem and has cried in the past when getting her photo taken, plus she always said I was too good for her, even though I think she is gorgeous and regularly told her. This got so bad she would freak out and cry if I saw her without make up on, or saw her legs. She is still only 23 and has been with me for four years (I'm 28) and has hinted at never seeing her friends (even though I always encouraged her to - she was just really stressed this year about work, so she worked constantly even at home. She was also stressed about the new house, the wedding, and not feeling good enough for me). I think she was overwhelmed by her life getting too serious too soon! Anyway after we broke up she didn't want to move out but after a few days she finally did. But she kept calling at the house flirting with me, calling me pet names and slapping me on my a**. She hasn't been around as much over the past few days but refuses to take her belongings. She also keeps calling me looking me to go shopping for things to decorate the house with as she wants it to look nice. She tells me all the time she loves me and fancies me more than she will ever fancy anyone, and wants to spend time with me. She has cried a few times saying things like "noone will believe you were my fiance." I haven't text her first yet but she texts me every single day ten times flirting with me telling me I'm hot and looking to know what I'm doing. She still hasn't slept since we broke up (she told me she feels like there's a ton of pressure on her)! When I tried to speak to her about making changes in the relationship (i.e. cancelling the wedding, she can move out, working only one job) to save it she was adamant it would not work. She told me she can only see her getting stressed again and us being miserable again. PLEASE HELP: Is she just leading me on or is there hope? Thanks guys Edited July 29, 2011 by TheDovic
Gema1986 Posted July 29, 2011 Posted July 29, 2011 Hi there, sorry to hear your having a tough time. Personally I think your ex has some serious issues that she needs help with. How can u be married to someone yet not allow them to see your legs or face without make up on. She needs to build her self esteem & learn to love herself. I also think that she doesnt want to let go, shes wanting to keep the contact & by flirting with u, shes keeping you interested. I'd suggest sitting down & talking to her. Either she wants to deal with her issues & u make a go of things or otherwise u cant live like that x
KathyM Posted July 29, 2011 Posted July 29, 2011 Sounds like she's too young and not ready for marriage. If you've been with her since she was 19, she's probably feeling she never experienced single life as an adult, and she got cold feet at the thought of such a big commitment. She still loves you, obviously, just not ready for marriage. If you're sure this girl is the one, then you'll have to wait until she is ready. Maybe a couple of years from now she'll consider marriage again. Just continue to date her, and don't pressure her to get married.
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