otherfish Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 (edited) History: - 2.5 year relationship. - "ended" late March of this year over a stupid fight about walking the dog. - NO CONTACT for 3.5 months, not a text, not an email, not a phonecall, nothing! In early July, I sent her a Happy Birthday text to which she responded "TY." I then asked her if I could take her to dinner to which she declined. One week passed with NC until she sends me a "blank" text. I questioned the blank text and she says, "sorry, it was an accident." Continue with NC until the following week when I receive another "blank" text. I question the text again and she says, "Im not playing games Im sorry it was an accident." I continue with NC.... Until later that afternoon when she sends a text saying, "Do you really not know the reason we ended?" I responded and said, "I really dont." I told her that I was out of town and driving through the night and if she wanted to talk it would be nice." About 1230am while driving through Atlanta she sends me a looooong text. I was driving and didnt feel comfortable texting her back a book so I just sent a text back asking her if I could call her. She said, "Yes." I called her and we talked for 2.5hrs and it was a fantastic conversation. I opened my heart to her about the pain that I had been feeling living without her for the past 3mos. To my surprise, she was open with me and told me how she spent the first 2mos in the fetal position unable to get out of bed and just not wanting to "live" life. How she didnt want to go outside or be with her friends or family. Her friends were trying to set her up with new guys to which she firmly declined. She didnt want to do anything but be with me. I asked her if I could come see her and take her for that birthday dinner. She said, "yes". So the next day I drove to her house and we spent the next 3 days together in an incredible fashion. We just finished a week in Cooperstown, NY for her sons baseball tournament and we had the best time. Its like we picked up exactly where we left off and the 3 month break without question only brought us closer together. So, I know there are many on LS that say stick to NO CONTACT. I broke NO CONTACT and it worked for me. All I can say to those who are in a heart-breaking situation...If you love him/her....FIGHT for him/her and make sure that they know you love them! Edited July 28, 2011 by otherfish
HeartOfAPhoenix Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Quite the love story you have there, sort of reminds me of how it works out in the movies... Although don't give advice saying "Fight for them", I tried this several times after my breakup. The only thing it lead to was an ego boost for her, and emotional suicide for me. I'm glad it worked out for you, I really am but you should know you are one of probably 10,000,000,000 breakups where it worked out and got stronger. Again Congratulations to your happy ending, as for the others... Proceed with caution and know when to throw in the towel.
Author otherfish Posted July 28, 2011 Author Posted July 28, 2011 Agreed. Maybe "fight for them" wasnt the best wording because actually I didnt fight for her at all. I just had a feeling, for my particular relationship, I needed to give her ample time to miss what I brought to her and the relationship. I rolled the dice and I won. Unbelievable how much she has changed during the 3mos NC. She is so open, loose and stress-free now. I really love this girl with all my heart. We are both 41. She has taken my breath away from Day 1........ Thank you for your words of encouragement.......
2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Good for you. I think though that your case is the exception to the rule. I tried similar things and got blank, zilch, nada and still to this day nothing but complete silence and ignorance. As phoenix said it is a big big risk to take because of the emotional suicide and subsequent ego boost to her that can set your healing back months, I know it did with me every time. Again well done and good luck. 2011
0hpenelope Posted July 29, 2011 Posted July 29, 2011 Mmm... I still say your experience contributed to the benefits of NC. Had you spent all of those 3.5 months begging for a way in with your ex again & blasting her w/ text messages, phone calls, e-mails, etc., I'm not sure if she would be as favorable to hearing from you. Congratulations and good luck!
Johnny85 Posted July 29, 2011 Posted July 29, 2011 This is a really great story. I kept wondering when the heartbreak would appear in your story, but there was actually a happy ending for once, which is a nice thing in this forum. Congratulations!
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