bigdgsr Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Weird Break Up Little background info: We started dating back in October. We had been friends for 10 years. We took things slowly from the beginning because we were putting a 10 year friendship on the line. We wanted to have an emotional connection before anything became physical. We waited 3 1/2 months before we slept together. Things started off great and we've had a good relationship since then. She has a 3 year old son and we have hit it off great. He is a part of my life now. We had our normal disagreements but nothing major until about 2 months ago, when she thought I was ready to break up with her. She was mad because she couldn't believe that I was ready to give up without even having our first real argument. We worked through it and I thought we were OK. A few weeks pass and I see, she is a little distant. We talk about it and she has put a wall up because of that argument, and how I was so quick to bring up breaking up. So we work on getting past this. The month of July was crazy for us. Her family was visiting for one week and she had to give up her house for them to stay in. It was a stressful week for her entire family. So there really wasn't any us time that week, and then last week we went on vacation together with her family (18 people in one house). We had a good time, but there wasn't any alone time. I look back and realize we haven't done anything with just the 2 of us since the beginning of June. So this past Tuesday, we are having dinner and a few drinks and we get on the topic of us and what is going on. Probably not the best time to have this conversation. We were both feeling pretty good. We end up talking for 4 hours. There is no arguing or yelling. She tells me the spark has disappeared and she doesn't know what to do to get it back. That she has been trying things and she doesn't know what to do and for her the spark is a lot of the relationship. She tells me she and her son both love me. That she wants me in their lives. She tells me all she has known in relationships is dysfunction and our relationship is functional and healthy. She tells me that she has issues and that she needs to talk to someone. I tell her, I am behind her 100% and whatever it takes, I will go through it with her. She doesn't want me to leave her alone. There is no angry or hatred between us. I left that night and we gave each other a big hug and kiss. I woke up yesterday and realized what had happened. I called her at work and asked her if we could chat at night. She agreed and I went over to chat last night. We were both tired and when we put her son to bed, we all ended up falling asleep. I woke up, said goodbye this morning and she said, lets chat tonight, I will call you later. No here is my dilemma. What do I do? My break-ups have never been like this. Usually I know that it is the end. I don't feel like this is the end for us. Should I cut off all contact and let her be? Should I stay around and spend time with her, and still do things with her and her son? I know we've hit a stagnant period and we need to do things with just the 2 of us, to get those feelings back.
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