BorisIAm Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Hi y'all. My dating skills aren't all that great, so I'm hoping for some advice here. A woman I recently began seeing pushed for a date and then cancelled an hour before we were supposed to hang out. I haven't heard from her in the 2 weeks since. The woman is in her mid 20s, and I've seen her a few times over a four-week span. Things seemed to be going well. She laughed hysterically at many of my lame jokes, and she would act kind of goofy -- which she didn't do around people she wasn't close to. I got the sense she was a little nervous, since she'd always be doing something like scratching her arm or face. She wouldn't initiate calls or text messages, but she would always respond to mine within 5 minutes or so. She'd also suggest going to events together. She'd also send out some mixed signals, though. Once in a while, she'd mention a boyfriend, then quickly add "ex-" to it and recover with something like, "Feels so weird to say that." Anyway, a few weeks ago we were talking about a museum we were both interested in, and she suggested that we go. We set a date, and a day before we were to go, she suggested lunch as well. An hour before we were supposed to meet, however, she said she wasn't feeling well and asked to reschedule. I haven't heard from her since, and I know -- through the facebook news feed -- that she's no longer sick. Basically, I'm pretty confused. I assume she might still be tied up over her ex, whom she dated for a couple years, but I just wondered what everyone else thought.
thatone Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 the only reason she gave you the time of day was to make the ex jealous. she'll run back to him over and over again. cut your losses. do not be 'friends', do not set up any more dates, do not give her the time of day. if she contacts you, tell her to be happy with her ex, that's who she chose when she stood you up and she needs to live with her choices.
grkBoy Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Basically, I'm pretty confused. I assume she might still be tied up over her ex, whom she dated for a couple years, but I just wondered what everyone else thought. I'd probably agree. Forget that she blew you off...look at the rest of her behavior. She's not giving you much reason to push for her. Make someone a priority when they make you one...and don't let lust cloud judgement. Never make someone a priority when you're only an option to them. The time before the date she might have danced with the idea of you, but I'll bet she can't let go of her ex, and I would not be surprised if she's still banging him in the hopes the RL will kick back up.
samspade Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Flakiness is a sign of interest level and options. Forget the ostensible 'reasons.' Unless she counter-offered with a different date (read: really wasn't feeling well/really wants to see you) then her IL is not high enough to make the effort. Par for the course these days. Women have options and don't NEED to show up to meet you. I'm not complaining about it - that's the way it is. As a man, always have a Plan B - even if it's to go to the museum alone (you can hit on girls there).
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