ptp Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 I used to think that chemistry is physical attraction between 2 people but, I have people who are attracted to each other but still don't have chemistry. Is it having a lot of things in common? Is it sharing a sense of humor? When you have had chemistry with some what did it mean?
OldSkool Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Chemistry means "run as fast as you can because they are probably crazy and you are somehow oddly attracted to crazy" Or at least that's what my experience has shown me
Author ptp Posted July 27, 2011 Author Posted July 27, 2011 Chemistry means "run as fast as you can because they are probably crazy and you are somehow oddly attracted to crazy" Or at least that's what my experience has shown me lol, it must be overrated but, I don't think I have ever experienced "chemistry" with a GF. I guess I am weird. I kind of want to experience "chemistry" even it is with a crazy
Sanman Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Part of it may be phyisical. However, I think there is a part that is simply that you like spending time with the person. The same way you may prefer a certain friend over others to spend time with even though there is no physical attraction.
mal129 Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Being able to sit in silence with each other without it feeling awkward. Chemistry.
chelle21689 Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 (edited) Hmm...I'm not entirely sure myself but here is what I think. This guy I'm seeing makes me stick around because of this...that I don't have with other guys. -Right when I first met him I couldn't stop thinking about him...and usually I'm not attracted to Asian guys lol - When I'm with him we have a lot of laughs. He makes me laugh a lot. - I just get happy to see him, it is like the highlight of my day and we don't have to do anything special. Me just sitting next to him doing our own thing being in his company is nice. - You have a feeling when you think of them...fuzzy or butterflies. You just blend well together. There was this one guy I met that I probably had the best chemistry with but we were both taken and in love with someone else. I think if we weren't we'd probably date. We could talk for hours and laugh. With my last ex I wasn't infatuated with him. I grew to love him and I had no eyes for anyone else even though I skipped the infatuation phase. Edited July 27, 2011 by chelle21689
threebyfate Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 This is a personal lens question. Chemistry is like a "click" and for myself, it's not all physical although physicality ends up playing a big role once that "click" happens. YMMV.
Butterflying Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Chemistry between two people is having the same outlook on things you both consider important. It's knowing how the other person feels, sometimes without having to ask. Being in the same presence with each other creates an inexplicable energy that simply feels good and secure like you can talk about anything or do anything with this person. You can say or do nothing with this person and still feel good. Just being with them is enough, sometimes. You miss each other when you're apart. You long for moments to be together again.
rafallus Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Probably that anxious feeling, that you positively have to be around the person, and **** everything else standing in your way.
Author ptp Posted July 27, 2011 Author Posted July 27, 2011 I don't think I have experienced "chemistry" with any past GF. I have taken a new girl out a couple of times. She is beautiful, classy and professional. She is the GF/LTR type of girl. We have a lot in common in terms of our family upbringing and morals but we have very different interests. She likes art, architecture, literature and plays etc.. while I like sports, computers etc.. We have strong physical connection, last Saturday we spent the whole night not sleeping. Is that "chemistry" or just a physical connection. We went to Panera Bread for a low key lunch today and she was fidgety the whole time. We sat in a booth, she was across the table from me and kept touching my leg. Then she started to hold my hands under table like we were in high school or something. Eventually she couldn't sit across from the table from me anymore, she so she got up and she had to sit right next to me to hold my hand. Is that "chemistry", a school girl crush (even though, she is a few years older/more mature than me) or is it just because this is a new relationship?
Emilia Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Chemistry is about wanting to rip each others clothes off, knowing what the other is thinking even when he is not around. It's butterfly in your belly, excitement and strong attraction. Feeling their body heat without needing to touch them. Climaxing in bed at the same time
alphamale Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 chemistry is something that cannot be defined. it just happens. there is no equation or logic or any rhyme or reason. but when two people have it, they both know it...
zengirl Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 For me, chemistry is feeling both comfortable and uncomfortable around someone at the same time. . . .but in such a wonderful way.
alphamale Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 For me, chemistry is feeling both comfortable and uncomfortable around someone at the same time. . . .but in such a wonderful way. why is that zg?
phineas Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Chemistry is a word that makes me flinch when I see it on a dating site. It basically means "i'm very picky so unless you are ZOMG! really,really, like REALLY hot I won't respond to your e-mail."
threebyfate Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Chemistry is a word that makes me flinch when I see it on a dating site. It basically means "i'm very picky so unless you are ZOMG! really,really, like REALLY hot I won't respond to your e-mail." Have you never experienced chemistry? It's an amazing feeling!
zengirl Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 why is that zg? Comfortable because you have a feeling that you've 'known the person forever' but uncomfortable because it's a strong enough connection that something is at stake.
Star Gazer Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 For me, chemistry is feeling both comfortable and uncomfortable around someone at the same time. . . .but in such a wonderful way. Comfortable because you have a feeling that you've 'known the person forever' but uncomfortable because it's a strong enough connection that something is at stake. Beautiful.
Cracker Jack Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Out of curiosity (I've never experienced this), chemistry has to come natural between two people, right? It's not something that can be created based on certain actions you do? I'm guessing it's the former. The reason why I ask is because I've heard the "I didn't feel any chemistry" line a few times and always wondered if it was possible I said (or did) something wrong to make them come to that conclusion. Most likely not, but still curious nonetheless.
threebyfate Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Out of curiosity (I've never experienced this), chemistry has to come natural between two people, right? It's not something that can be created based on certain actions you do? I'm guessing it's the former. The reason why I ask is because I've heard the "I didn't feel any chemistry" line a few times and always wondered if it was possible I said (or did) something wrong to make them come to that conclusion. Most likely not, but still curious nonetheless.I agree that you can't create chemistry but actions or words can stop it in its tracks.
Author ptp Posted July 27, 2011 Author Posted July 27, 2011 Out of curiosity (I've never experienced this), chemistry has to come natural between two people, right? It's not something that can be created based on certain actions you do? I'm guessing it's the former. The reason why I ask is because I've heard the "I didn't feel any chemistry" line a few times and always wondered if it was possible I said (or did) something wrong to make them come to that conclusion. Most likely not, but still curious nonetheless. For some reason its always the girl telling the guy "I don't feel the chemistry". I always thought that meant the girl didn't find the guy attractive but now I am not so sure. Because girls have told me that they find a guy attractive yet feel no chemistry for him.
OliveOyl Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Organic chemistry was the first class I got a C+ in. Chemistry between two people? Good question. In my opinion, there are different kinds of chemistry. There's mental chemistry (the kind you have with that good friend who you can talk all day with and they really "get" you) and there's physical chemistry (the kind you have with that person who you can be in bed with all day...). And then there's emotional chemistry (the person who understands how you really feel about stuff). But overall no matter what type of chemistry I would say it involves an effortlessness, a "click". By definition it is not something that can be created, it is either there, or it is not. Having chemistry does not guarantee the relationship will work, but if there is NO chemistry of any type, then it will be a much more uphill battle to make it work, in my opinion.
alphamale Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Comfortable because you have a feeling that you've 'known the person forever' but uncomfortable because it's a strong enough connection that something is at stake. i see...so its like a double-edged sword
runner Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 Comfortable because you have a feeling that you've 'known the person forever' but uncomfortable because it's a strong enough connection that something is at stake. excellent way to put it ...especially true in the early days.
zengirl Posted July 28, 2011 Posted July 28, 2011 I don't think you can force chemistry, but I certainly don't think it's always instant. Sometimes it's stealthy and emerges later! i see...so its like a double-edged sword Well . . . Except both parts are actually kinda good. We need some discomfort for growth, after all. The discomfort is what makes you reach out and make things happen!
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