Kay85 Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 :sick:So where do i begin. I knew this guy for about 5yrs now. We were friends but always liked each other very much. I was married but even though my marriage sucks I never cheated. Anyways recently I finally got a divorce. Knowing it was too early to jump into a relationship right after a divorce...I did it anyways. Its been about 5 months now since we have "officially" been together. It started out fun but things started to get really sad later. He was studying to take the MCAT to go to medical school. This is his 3rd time taking this damn test. He became stressed and just angry all the time. I tryed to be there for him but all he does is treat me like ****. We never go on dates all we do is chill at home and have sex. He is not romantic anymore and doesnt put much effort into making me special anymore. He always say that he loves me very much and does not want to loose me, but his actions are not the same. He would ignore my calls, then when he feels like talking its always "I am so busy with work,volunteering,and MCAT stuff" sometimes I will call him and instead of returning my calls he text me "yeah whats up..I was busy" He talks about other female he use to like or who liked him as if I am just his friend...And when I say I dont like it his response is "you need to chill...youre my girl and I love you" He doesnt want to meet any of my friends or family..he claims its too early I am a plus size women. He loves big girls and all his ex are way bigger than I am, but he makes fun of me sometimes. He makes fun of my stretch marks and at the end of it all he says "I am just kidding...I love your body and your drop dead gorgeous to me" He criticize everything I do. I am a make-up artist and he was looking at some of my photography of my work....he said to me...this is bad and you look like a hooker...who wears make-up like this. O_O I think I am an amazing artist and people love my work. I use to get paid gigs to do make-up and teach people how to apply make-up. I dont get this guy and now im hurt fed up and I cant take it anymore. I came out of a terrible marriage to go into a hurtful relationship. I am emtionally drained from the divorce,this relationship,my finances, I am in nursing school and I am doing terrible. I feel depress and lonely and feel like I am at the end of my ropes right now. Please someone...I could use some advice,suggestions, or encouragement.
betterdeal Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Dear me, it sounds awful. Whatever his story is, your relationship with him is making you unhappy. So why are you sticking to the relationship? Please don't say because you love him - that's a given - but I love my parents; doesn't mean I live with them or put up with any crap from them. I love bacon, but I don't have it every day. You see what I'm getting at? Take stock of your life and decide what will make you happy. You've told him he has hurt your feelings and he continues to do so, which is quite a cruel thing to do, because he definitely knows he's hurting you but chooses to continue to do so. So, leave him. Move into a shared house if you can't afford your own place. And refocus on your nursing course. Talk to your supervisor / tutor and explain you have been having relationship difficulties that may have impeded your progress, and see if they can offer any help with getting you back up to speed on the course. Also, consider seeing your doctor about anti-depressants if you feel depressed, although personally, I think the depression is just a result of feeling trapped in an unhappy, unfulfilled relationship. It's okay to ask for help. And treat yourself. Go and get a haircut, a new top, a massage - something nice that you'll enjoy just for you.
thatone Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 :sick:So where do i begin. I knew this guy for about 5yrs now. We were friends but always liked each other very much. I was married but even though my marriage sucks I never cheated. Anyways recently I finally got a divorce. Knowing it was too early to jump into a relationship right after a divorce...I did it anyways. Its been about 5 months now since we have "officially" been together. It started out fun but things started to get really sad later. He was studying to take the MCAT to go to medical school. This is his 3rd time taking this damn test. He became stressed and just angry all the time. I tryed to be there for him but all he does is treat me like ****. We never go on dates all we do is chill at home and have sex. He is not romantic anymore and doesnt put much effort into making me special anymore. He always say that he loves me very much and does not want to loose me, but his actions are not the same. He would ignore my calls, then when he feels like talking its always "I am so busy with work,volunteering,and MCAT stuff" sometimes I will call him and instead of returning my calls he text me "yeah whats up..I was busy" He talks about other female he use to like or who liked him as if I am just his friend...And when I say I dont like it his response is "you need to chill...youre my girl and I love you" He doesnt want to meet any of my friends or family..he claims its too early I am a plus size women. He loves big girls and all his ex are way bigger than I am, but he makes fun of me sometimes. He makes fun of my stretch marks and at the end of it all he says "I am just kidding...I love your body and your drop dead gorgeous to me" He criticize everything I do. I am a make-up artist and he was looking at some of my photography of my work....he said to me...this is bad and you look like a hooker...who wears make-up like this. O_O I think I am an amazing artist and people love my work. I use to get paid gigs to do make-up and teach people how to apply make-up. I dont get this guy and now im hurt fed up and I cant take it anymore. I came out of a terrible marriage to go into a hurtful relationship. I am emtionally drained from the divorce,this relationship,my finances, I am in nursing school and I am doing terrible. I feel depress and lonely and feel like I am at the end of my ropes right now. Please someone...I could use some advice,suggestions, or encouragement. you can get offended at this if you want, but a man will do a FWB/booty call type relationship with a woman he's not physically attracted to and give the same excuse as the one you have listed in bold every time. and it won't ever change.
temporaryvisa Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Ahh, this is horrible I'm sorry about this. This guy's a jerk...Please stop dating him!
kiss_andmakeup Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 What do you do? Break up with him, obviously. You just got out of a long relationship...take some time to work on yourself, including working out and eating right IF it is something you wish to change. If not, that's fine too, just accept that your dating pool will be smaller. Plus size or not, this guy sounds like an insensitive jerk. No reason to stay with him.
carhill Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Welcome to LS and add my vote to the 'lose the loser' column
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