Orchidea Posted July 26, 2011 Posted July 26, 2011 Yesterday morning, my boyfriend gave a lift to a female friend he said he has supposedley known for many years. Later that night, as i was adjusting his call alerts in his mobile (at his request), i came across his messages folder. I jokingly said to him that i was going to look through his messages. I dont know if he immediately registered what i said, but as i pressed the inbox folder i noticed a female name there which was recent and asked him who this person was. He quickly grabbed the phone and we grappled with it awhile til it was removed from my grasp. After conversing many hours over the incident, i am still not convinced that he doesn't know why this particular female would send such a message to him if they were just friends. Apparently, they haven't had any sexual relations, and have never induldged in such converstaions, neither has he given her any impression that he is attracted to her (his claims). So why would she send such a message? I dont believe him. The message read "When i come back from holiday, I will thife you one night." I can only imagine what that may mean. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, but this is not sitting well with me . When he came around me this afternoon, i just didn't feel right. I'm ready to let him go if i can know for certain. What do you guys make of this? Do you think im being naive to even offer him the benefit of the doubt..?We've been together 7 months. If it makes any difference, he's 59 yrs.
Andy_K Posted July 26, 2011 Posted July 26, 2011 He's 59, you're presumably in a similar ballpark, and you fought over a mobile phone? Proof that age does not always bring maturity
sm1tten Posted July 26, 2011 Posted July 26, 2011 I'm trying to figure out what the hell "thife" could possibly be a misspelling for. At any rate, the fact that you were grappling over the phone means he didn't intend for you to see it. It could be that you are jealous person who misinterprets things and he didn't want the drama. Or it could be that he's doing something that you would not be okay with. The only person who can tell you which is him. If your relationship is otherwise solid I would probably give him the benefit of the doubt, but if this is going to eat away at you then that's not really an option.
Author Orchidea Posted July 26, 2011 Author Posted July 26, 2011 sm1tten, I can be quite a jealous person, but him fighting for the phone has made me even more suspect. He did just hand it to me though, after he saw how upset i was. I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but the message keeps creeping back into my head. But i guess his word is all i have right now :-(.
azsinglegal Posted July 26, 2011 Posted July 26, 2011 sm1tten, I can be quite a jealous person, but him fighting for the phone has made me even more suspect. He did just hand it to me though, after he saw how upset i was. I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but the message keeps creeping back into my head. But i guess his word is all i have right now :-(. Ask him what it means. He knows you've already seen it. I don't think I'd be too happy if my man went thru my phone, but then again, I don't want to go thru his either. Not that I have anything to hide, but it's an invasion of privacy IMO. I've never gone thru someone else's phone as I fear I'll see something I either don't want to, or it'll cause a fight as it's taken out of context. I let my man play "words with friends" for me over the weekend, and when he was done, he handed my phone back w/out even looking at it. I told him I have NOTHING to hide but it was a courtesy thing for him. I have male friends, he has female friends. As long as when he's with me, he's with ME, I'm good. We both turn our phones on silent when we're together and if we respond to a txt or call we tell each other who it is. When we're apart, if he's talking to other women, that's fine. As long as he's not sleeping with them, I'm ok with it. People flirt with the opposite sex, it's normal. As my mom always said, "I don't care where he gets his appetite from, as long as he comes home for dinner."
betterdeal Posted July 26, 2011 Posted July 26, 2011 And when you're on a diet you can still look in the fridge.
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