Shaun-Dro Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 I was with a classmate of mine yesterday at the Museum of Bodies Exhibit in the city and it was loaded with people trying to keep cool. Since we're doing our internship together at the hospital we felt we could learn some extra things we can utilize with anatomy and pathology. While there we stopped off at the cafe downstairs on the main level and it was packed with more people, especially women. My classmate is single in his mid 20s so he checked out most of the ladies. I just stood around a bit and looked at a few cute ones, but never bothered to chat any of them up since I'm already taken. My classmate talked to the first 3 that "seemed" to give him the signal. He claimed they were playing with their hair and kept shooting glances at him so he approached. He got shot down all three times. He spotted the cashier behind the counter looking at him so he made one other attempt, but she showed him her wedding band and that took care of that. Lastly, he spotted another cute girl that was reading a magazine or book, so he positioned himself in front of her, but she wouldn't look at him. This annoyed him and he was about to leave, but I told him just talk to her and see what she does because women are "weird" and you just never know. He finally agreed to it and chatted her up. I watched it from the sidelines. I notice she was serious, no smiling like the other girls that rejected him, but when he came back, there was the girl's number and email in his hand! He was shocked and doesn't know what to do because the girl gave him no signals of interest but yet showed immediate interest in giving him the chance he longed for. It even had me scratching my head. I have to admit...women are definitely the "strangest" breed. You can not truly ever read them. Guys, your thoughts?
smudge21 Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 As a guy, my only response is simply "I agree!"... Seriously, just accept that men are not meant to understand women just as women are not meant to understand men. Think how boring things would be if both sexes knew each other perfectly - where would the excitement and challenge be of chatting someone up and hoping that they'll say yes. Life is about challenges and overcoming them, as much as I'd like it to be a little easier when approaching the ladies, I really like how things are. Besides, it allows us guys to have secrets that the girls never know, and allows them to think that we don't know what they're secrets are.
Disillusioned Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 Don't take the word of all those Body Language books as gospel.
Author Shaun-Dro Posted July 24, 2011 Author Posted July 24, 2011 Don't take the word of all those Body Language books as gospel. Those Body Language books are nonsense, because it's only correct about 50% of the time, often less, because what happened with my classmate at the museum yesterday was downright opposite.
zengirl Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 Truth be told, you never KNOW what signals someone was sending unless you ask them. You only know what signals you thought you were receiving. Honestly, I've experienced both sending and receiving errors. I wouldn't read too much into it. I touch my hair all the time. . . because I'm a hair toucher. It has nothing to do with finding a man attractive. However, if I touch a guy on the shoulder (intentionally and for no specific reason---not like if I bump into him on the stairs or something), that means I think he's sexy. Every individual has different random signals they give off. C'est la vie.
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 I was just now reading a book while playing with my hair. Neither was an invitation of any kind, to any body. Just sayin'.
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 A big problem with all this is your choice to view what these girls are doing as "sending signals." If a girl is on a date with you, sitting across the table and playing with her hair, it has a much higher chance of being a "signal" that she is "sending" than it would be if a random girl in a museum was standing around playing with her hair. Sorry to be a buzz killer - but what most of the girls in that crowded public location did or didn't do had nothing to do with "sending signals" to you and your friend.
Author Shaun-Dro Posted July 24, 2011 Author Posted July 24, 2011 Truth be told, you never KNOW what signals someone was sending unless you ask them. You only know what signals you thought you were receiving. Honestly, I've experienced both sending and receiving errors. I wouldn't read too much into it. I touch my hair all the time. . . because I'm a hair toucher. It has nothing to do with finding a man attractive. However, if I touch a guy on the shoulder (intentionally and for no specific reason---not like if I bump into him on the stairs or something), that means I think he's sexy. Every individual has different random signals they give off. C'est la vie. Yes, and some women give off no signals and just sit there, albeit in wait of any man of interest to come along and pursue them. Meanwhile, others tease and flirt with guys they have no interest in dating. Too many cruel ones out there I see.
Disillusioned Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 Those Body Language books are nonsense, because it's only correct about 50% of the time, often less, because what happened with my classmate at the museum yesterday was downright opposite. Just the fact that you're reading those kind of books says you're probably looking for some sort of yes-or-no outright validation. Unfortunately things aren't that simple. Yes, and some women give off no signals and just sit there, albeit in wait of any man of interest to come along and pursue them. Meanwhile, others tease and flirt with guys they have no interest in dating. Too many cruel ones out there I see. And there are others who stay away because they understand those events for what they are: players trying to pick up on other players. Keepers just don't show up at those things, or if they do, they don't show up a second time.
rafallus Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 Body language books are worthless, because they don't really focus on context. Only clue you really need, is that she keeps being around you. Rest makes you vulnerable to overanalyzing and not taking action when you should.
Author Shaun-Dro Posted July 26, 2011 Author Posted July 26, 2011 Body language books are worthless, because they don't really focus on context. Only clue you really need, is that she keeps being around you. Rest makes you vulnerable to overanalyzing and not taking action when you should. I dont read any books about relationships, let's get that straight. I made a statement about the Body Language books based on what another poster had said. Every thing that I do is strictly who I've become through my life and its experiences with people and the opposite gender.
spiderowl Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 Body language is largely rubbish. I rarely give out signals as I like to keep a low profile due to having been harassed by some guys in the past. I would make an effort not to do anything that might attract a guy's attention or make him think I was interested, e.g. catch his eye, twirl hair, lick lips, any of the things that guys are taught are signs. However, if the right guy came along and approached in a nice way, I might be interested. I would wait to see if I liked his manner and his nature. If he asked, I might give him contact details or a hint or where I would be some time in the future, but there would be no hair twirling involved!
Casablanca Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 He finally agreed to it and chatted her up. I watched it from the sidelines. I notice she was serious, no smiling like the other girls that rejected him, but when he came back, there was the girl's number and email in his hand! She could just as easily never respond or gave out fakes to just get him to go away....one of my friends use to give guys she had no interest in the number to the public bus office And I only bring this up based off your description of what you saw as I picture it as her looking bored
Imajerk17 Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 The real test is whether or not she follows through when your friend calls. AND whether or not she is worth getting to know (does she have a personality under her shell).
rafallus Posted July 27, 2011 Posted July 27, 2011 I dont read any books about relationships, let's get that straight. I made a statement about the Body Language books based on what another poster had said. Every thing that I do is strictly who I've become through my life and its experiences with people and the opposite gender. The point is, in the end, small, petty cues are just that... petty cues, and they don't even have to mean anything. That puts you in the mode, where you're busy looking for them, but not much else comes of it. Typical conversation after me reading Allan Pease's book: "This girl was totally playing with her hair, man, she was sooooo interested!!!!" "So, did you get her number/made any move on her?" "Oh, uhhh, well, no, but..."
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