SarahBerry Posted July 23, 2011 Posted July 23, 2011 (edited) I am currently moving out of my apartment into a flat , i have lived with my boyfriend for a year -we have been together for a year and 5 months. In the time i have known my boyfriend he has always spoken of wanting to move to australia and i intern have agreed i would also look at moving because i have thought (before we met) that i would like to move to i have visited and loved it). However i recently started a new job which is a contract role for 8 months -i have only been in the role for 2 months and hate it, yes no i actually do hate it, it just turned out to be the completely wrong role for me which has been incredibly stressful and i want to leave asap and am required to give a months notice. I previously had been working in a role that was permanent and i asked my boyfriend at the time knowing he wanted to move to australia soon if he would be ok to move at the end of the 8 month contract which he was ok with but then unfortunately his job became terrible the management mainly and he left early and took a settlement and decided that it would be the best time to move to australia to go with $ which does make sense, however it put me in a slightly awkward position because i had just started a job and besides all of these dramas i have been having quite a few arguments with my boyfriend in our relationship as he can say some rude/sick things around me which he says is a bad habit and is annoying sometimes and i have asked him to not say rude or sick things cause it makes me feel uncomfortable and he only has changed a bit but not much which has made me question the relationship for the last 3 months .... so i have got advice from a few people of how to deal with all this and decided to let him go to australia which he has done and just flown out to move permanently and although he has told me many many times he reallly wants me to go with him because i feel a bit unsure about us recently and having just started a new job i told him i will move into a flat and get my head straight and think about what i want to do and if i want to move it happens if i dont then it doesnt happen... for me its just hard making that decision of is it the right decision to move.... i do love him and today and yesterday i have been crying about him going cause ill miss him heaps and i just need advise as how to best make a decision that is going to work for me. He did say that because i have told him that i feel unsure the last few months he is feeling unsure but he still really wants me to move with him. I just feel confused...please anyone advice would be much appreciated. Edited July 23, 2011 by SarahBerry
fallenenvy Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 Uprooting your life and moving to be with a guy you are having serious doubts about? Do you really need an answer for that? Let me talk from my own personal experiance. I've had not one but 2 guys move across the county and into my place with me. I broke up with the first one and guess what? He's still here....in my house. He had nowhere to go so we went through an incredibly awkward time before we just got used to it... honestly i wouldn't wish that on anyone and im not sure many people could even deal with that. Did i learn my lesson? Yes and no. Guy #2 moved here.. the problem was we couldn't manage the distance anymore...and he couldn't afford his own place here.. so in he came; even with my hesitations. Now things are a bit rocky at times.. and if things go bad.... idk what's going to happen and i don't want to think about it right now. You do owe it to yourself to think long and hard about this. Say you move in with him.. and things go sour.. what are you going to do? where are you going to go? Where are you gonna do for work/money? I know you have feelings for him but if you are already having doubts....you may want to try to let it go... sorry if that isn't what you want to hear :-( best of luck to you ~Fallen
Author SarahBerry Posted July 24, 2011 Author Posted July 24, 2011 I wouldn't say they are serious doubts just a couple of things that i have got upset about that have annoyed or upset me at times... and i guess i am thinking for the long term will i want to live with these attitudes.. but thanks i think it is true that you have to think what would happen if it did go sour..
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