zengirl Posted July 24, 2011 Posted July 24, 2011 No I can still do things like going to movies, dinner with family or friends but not the things below Dating Amusement Parks Constant Ordering Out Right, but we're saying dating can be as cheap as dinner with family or friends. My BF and I stayed in and made a pizza on our 4th date (rolled out the dough, etc) and it probably cost about $15 for the meal + a few microbrews. And it was very fun. There are "going out" dates that are nearly free. There's an art walk in our city twice a month -- totally free fun + free drinks or snacks sometimes. There are loads of free or cheap events.
morethanconfused Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 If I would be the girl I would be more concerned about why it takes the guy 3 weeks to go with me on another date. I mean what did you tell her why you won’t be able to go out with her any time soon? Did you tell her that you are too busy or is she the one who doesn’t have time right now? If I would have been on 4 great dates with a guy that I am interested in I would start to wonder why I should just text with him for 3-4 weeks until we would go on another date. Have you ever thought about that?
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 If I would be the girl I would be more concerned about why it takes the guy 3 weeks to go with me on another date. I mean what did you tell her why you won’t be able to go out with her any time soon? Did you tell her that you are too busy or is she the one who doesn’t have time right now? If I would have been on 4 great dates with a guy that I am interested in I would start to wonder why I should just text with him for 3-4 weeks until we would go on another date. Have you ever thought about that? Because I have to get my finances in order. Why would I be going out on a date before I receive my first bi-weekly unemployment check?????????
Philosoraptor Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 You don't need money to date. I consider myself quite frugal and have never had any issues finding enjoyable things to do. Parks are free, hikes are free, so many options out there. Heck probably 20% of the country is out of work (I know the statistics say lower but really now?) and they keep busy. Join a meetup.com group and find something fun and free to do there. No reason to put anything on hold with someone you like just because you are out of work. Be honest, continue the job search, and try to make time with her enjoyable.
morethanconfused Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 Because I have to get my finances in order. Why would I be going out on a date before I receive my first bi-weekly unemployment check????????? I know that and I understand why you are doing that but she doesn't. Or have you explained to her what happened?
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 I know that and I understand why you are doing that but she doesn't. Or have you explained to her what happened? If we talked on the phone for 2 weeks when I had a job, then i see no reason why we wouldn't be able to talk on the phone for 3 weeks if I had no job
alphamale Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 Let's see if we stay in contact dude, you shouldn't have told her you got layed off
misssmartypants Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 Damm, why did this have to happen this year? Last year I worked all year and didn't meet anyone but now I meet someone this year and get laid off. So I really can't afford to treat her to dinner more than twice a month if that. So I don't even know when I next date will be but she is still interested in getting to know me after hearing what happened to me today. My plan is to go on a movie and dinner date the first week in August. Let's see if we stay in contact So sorry to hear about your job, the timing blows! Can you try to transition to fixing dinner at home and watching a rented movie or playing cards or a game instead of "going out"? I know the idea of having someone in your house can seem more intimate and forward than an out on the town date, but you need to be a little selfish and take care of yourself. Good luck, I hope things work out.
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 dude, you shouldn't have told her you got layed off I had too because I have no money to spend until aug 3rd. So she would have been wondering why I couldn;t go out
alphamale Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 I had too because I have no money to spend until aug 3rd. So she would have been wondering why I couldn;t go out why do you have to spend money to go out? you can go for a walk in the park and buy her an ice cream for $2.00. I sure you can find that much change in your sofa or under your car seat...
misssmartypants Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 I had too because I have no money to spend until aug 3rd. So she would have been wondering why I couldn;t go out That, and dishonesty is never a good thing at any stage of a relationship.
alphamale Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 That, and dishonesty is never a good thing at any stage of a relationship. don't give me that baloney
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 why do you have to spend money to go out? you can go for a walk in the park and buy her an ice cream for $2.00. I sure you can find that much change in your sofa or under your car seat... I'm not leaving my APT until I get a bi-weekly unemployment check. And noice I said bi-weekly because you have to receive a weely check first before you get a bi-weekly. So I will see her in mid august, if she can't wait then I will move on
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 I aso told her today that my computer shutdown down and that I had to pay $180 to get it fix. So these are things she needs to know if she is going to understand my situation.
morethanconfused Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 If we talked on the phone for 2 weeks when I had a job, then i see no reason why we wouldn't be able to talk on the phone for 3 weeks if I had no job Because if I would be her I wouldn’t understand why you couldn’t just spend some time with me. I would probably understand that you would really like to take care of your financial situation and I would appreciate that but I wouldn’t understand why we couldn’t just do something nice and cheap (like the things that some of us already suggested) in the meantime. Don’t forget that she could also think that you are using your situation as an excuse for not dating her right now. Sometimes a lot of weird stuff is going on in a mind of a woman. Almost everyone here already told you there are a lot of things that could do with her without spending too much money. If none of us here understand why you can’t just take her to a walk in park or such so what makes you think that she would be the only one who would understand without starting to wonder?
zengirl Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 I'm not leaving my APT until I get a bi-weekly unemployment check. And noice I said bi-weekly because you have to receive a weely check first before you get a bi-weekly. So I will see her in mid august, if she can't wait then I will move on Do what you will, but this seems needlessly sad to me. I understand not spending money but not "not leaving [your] APT." I wouldn't understand that. I'd understand the layoff and the money. I wouldn't understand not wanting to see me at all for three weeks because of that if a guy really liked me.
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 Do what you will, but this seems needlessly sad to me. I understand not spending money but not "not leaving [your] APT." I wouldn't understand that. I'd understand the layoff and the money. I wouldn't understand not wanting to see me at all for three weeks because of that if a guy really liked me. I do like her because I had a dream last night that she started dating another guy since I had no job-lol
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 I probaly will suggest something cheap or free to do next week. But right now it's too much going on Laptop is being repaired at a repair shop which means job search is on FREEEZE Waiting to see if Obama and the Senate will come to an agreement so I can know for a fact I will receive unemployment checks The Food is my Fridge has to last me until atleast July 31st So hopefully by next Wednesday I will be ok
zengirl Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 I probaly will suggest something cheap or free to do next week. But right now it's too much going on Laptop is being repaired at a repair shop which means job search is on FREEEZE Waiting to see if Obama and the Senate will come to an agreement so I can know for a fact I will receive unemployment checks The Food is my Fridge has to last me until atleast July 31st So hopefully by next Wednesday I will be ok I think a week or even two is maybe understandable. I would understand a brief delay like that, since getting laid off isn't just financial but just basically sucks all around. I hope she understands, your laptop gets repaired soon, and things get better for you, PD.
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 I think a week or even two is maybe understandable. I would understand a brief delay like that, since getting laid off isn't just financial but just basically sucks all around. I hope she understands, your laptop gets repaired soon, and things get better for you, PD. I ddnt enjoy hearing that my laptop wouldn't be ready until next Tuesday since it's a $180. For a $180 I would expect it to be ready this week. And yes being laid off is more is not just financial but mentally u may not be ready to go out and paint the town red
misssmartypants Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 don't give me that baloney So, you think lying to the person you are dating is the way to go? I know why I'm single, now we know why you are as well. I do like her because I had a dream last night that she started dating another guy since I had no job-lol This is a huge life change and I am sure its sent you for a loop. I understand how the political situation can make things like this feel even worse. I can tell that a lot if going on just with you at the moment. So I have another suggestion. Instead of hiding in your apartment from her and brooding over your food stores (believe me, I know that feeling), and leaving her out in limbo, be honest with her. Tell her you don't know what next month will bring and you are feeling very insecure at the moment. And then offer to break things off with her. I think that's more fair than having her waiting and wondering what the heck is going on.
zengirl Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 So, you think lying to the person you are dating is the way to go? I know why I'm single, now we know why you are as well. This is a huge life change and I am sure its sent you for a loop. I understand how the political situation can make things like this feel even worse. I can tell that a lot if going on just with you at the moment. So I have another suggestion. Instead of hiding in your apartment from her and brooding over your food stores (believe me, I know that feeling), and leaving her out in limbo, be honest with her. Tell her you don't know what next month will bring and you are feeling very insecure at the moment. And then offer to break things off with her. I think that's more fair than having her waiting and wondering what the heck is going on. I don't think he should "offer to break things off" --- apparently he's told her what's going on. He doesn't NEED to say "I feel insecure." Any girl is going to get that he might. And offering to break it off is weird/bad-insecure. He should just tell her he needs a little time to himself and hopefully do something with her next week, as he said, later in the week after he begins to absorb the shock of all this. If she's the girl for PD, she'll hang in. But not for weeks at a time with no information . . . I agree with you on that.
Author PhillyDude Posted July 25, 2011 Author Posted July 25, 2011 I don't think he should "offer to break things off" --- apparently he's told her what's going on. He doesn't NEED to say "I feel insecure." Any girl is going to get that he might. And offering to break it off is weird/bad-insecure. He should just tell her he needs a little time to himself and hopefully do something with her next week, as he said, later in the week after he begins to absorb the shock of all this. If she's the girl for PD, she'll hang in. But not for weeks at a time with no information . . . I agree with you on that. hShe did call today around 1pm to see how I was doing so I thought that was nice.
misssmartypants Posted July 25, 2011 Posted July 25, 2011 hShe did call today around 1pm to see how I was doing so I thought that was nice. Take it easy, I wish this wasn't happening to you.
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