change Posted July 22, 2011 Posted July 22, 2011 I haven't been on here in awhile, but I wanted some feedback on dating post-divorce from those that have been there. I've been 'casually dating' one woman for about a month now, and have gone on a couple other dates that were less interesting. Advice that I've read aside, I didn't give the whole process much thought initially, because I wasn't aware that what I was stepping into was any kind of romantic/sexual/intimate relationship until it had already happened. Once it became clear what was transpiring between us, I stated very clearly that I was uninterested in a serious relationship, because I was still seeking a hopeful reconciliation with my wife and just wasn't ready. It's become apparent since that conversation that: (1) my wife has no desire to reconcile, and (2) reconciliation is a bad idea for us. This doesn't mean I'm happy about the divorce -- I'm terrified and saddened! -- but my perspective has greatly evolved. So... the nitty-gritty. Whereas most of the women I've met I'm not particularly interested in, I really like this woman I've been seeing for the last month. We have a lot in common, a lot of chemistry... etc. I'm really terrified of developing an emotional attachment to her, especially since she was fine with casually dating with no obligations/exclusivity, which is what I setup from the start. Although what is dating, really, until you get to know someone over a longer term? It seems juvenile to be "serious" when you've known each other for less than a few months anyway, right? Has anyone that's jumped into the dating (and sex) pool had difficulty with this? I don't know if emotional attachments can even be avoided. It seems like something that just happens... or doesn't. I've never done this "casual" thing before. Experiences, please? The collective wisdom of LS would be greatly appreciated.
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