OhItsADisaster Posted July 22, 2011 Posted July 22, 2011 Here's the story. I met a great guy on my first day at a new school in high school. He was sweet, really cute, and taken. We kidded around a few times about him liking me, but he's one of those guys that can't always been taken seriously, so I assumed that he was always kidding. Lets call him "John". I met another guy, who was also taken at the time, later that year. He acted like he had no interest in me whatsoever. I'll call him "Sean" I dated a few people throughout high school, neither of which was either of the guys I mentioned. After high school, I broke up with my "high school sweetheart" and started working. About a year after graduation, "Sean" came into the restaurant I worked at, and before he left, he asked me for my number. We went on a date that weekend and started dating a few weeks later. I found out after about a month of us "being official" that when we had gone on our first date, he was still dating the girl he had been in high school, but he had broken up with her the morning after our date. I didn't find out until after we had been dating a few months that "John" was one of his best friends. After six months of me and "Sean" dating, we moved in together. Everything seemed fine for awhile until his ex's friend sent me a message on FB saying that he thought I needed to know that my boyfriend was cheating on me. I was in denial for awhile, but a few months later, he admitted that they had slept together several times. We broke up for a few weeks, but we ended up getting back together after a lot of talking and working things out. He has not slept with his ex since that I know of (and I know that he hasn't even had the opportunity since then). Anyways, it's been about a year since this has all happened. I have to admit that I have been tempted a few times to get back at "Sean" and cheat right back, but I've never done so. But a few days ago we were at a party with a few of his friends (including "John"). While "Sean" and a few others were outside smoking, me and "John" sat inside talking (we had all been drinking). I forget what exactly was said leading up to this, but he ended up telling me that he wished he was with me. Throughout the night, I found myself going out of my way to get his attention. This is not like myself at all, but I find him very, very attractive. More attractive than my boyfriend, though I'm not trying to be mean. The next day, he acted like he couldn't remember what had been said, so I ended up telling him what had been said on FB. He acted surprised and said he wasn't sure why he had said that because he knew he could have gotten in a fight with "Sean" if he had overheard. I assured him that "Sean" had heard none of what had been said. The problem is that, since then, I have not been able to get "John" out of my head. I think about him constantly and I find myself checking his status updates to see if there is any indication that he really does have feelings for me, though I know it would be stupid of either of us to post something online where "Sean" would be able to see it. I know its wrong, but I have the strongest urge to get with "John". Though my current boyfriend hasn't been loyal, I can't see "John" sleeping with me because "Sean" is his best friend, though several times he has mentioned that "he would have never cheated on me and he can't see why 'Sean' would risk losing me". My emotions are so messed up. "Sean" is leaving for the military next month and I know temptation will be high for me to call up "John" and invite him over. I need some advice. I love "Sean", but I have always felt a connection to "John". I know I'm rambling now, so please just tell me what I should do.
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