EDC Posted July 21, 2011 Posted July 21, 2011 Do people pretend to not like the person they have a crush on? Do they even go as far as encouraging their crush to pursue other people? I do all of the above, but for a long time I didn't understand why I keep doing it. I finally realized that I was lying to myself, that I fear rejection, that my standards were too high, and lastly, that I based her on my ideal/fantasy of a perfect girlfriend. That is why when I talk to her, or any other girls that I have an interest in, I end up comparing them to a perfect girlfriend, or worst, to my first love. I hate the fact that I have to be around them and act friendly with them all because I keep lying to myself. I hate the fact that I encourage them to pursue the hot guys or guys they like just because I keep telling myself that I'm just their friend. That is why I now want to seek change. I want to stop lying to myself. I want affirm that the fact that I want a girlfriend who is not a perfect person, who has personal issues, and often struggles in life. I want to stop myself from becoming friends with the females I have interest in because I don't want to convince myself that they are not girlfriend material. I want a girlfriend, but I make it hard for myself and for others as well. Be careful how you treat females because how you treat them can come back and treat you just as how you treat them...as a friend. That's my two cents.
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